Sep 27, 2023: Apparently our washer is only running cold water no matter the temperature setting I select... no wonder the diapers aren't getting clean.
Update Aug 8, 2024:
I feel that we have tried “everything” yet we cannot get these pocket diapers clean. We have used them exclusively (except for a trip or two) for 1.5 years and have been dealing with recurring stink and leaks for significantly more than a year. We retired the cloth this week and are using disposables, which at this point is a relief. But I still want to know why we can't get our diapers clean.
Let me describe all we have tried to fix the stinky pocket diaper problem.
@MonicaWasMistreated suggested we're using too much detergent. I think she was right. I began using less detergent and repeating rinse cycles until no more bubbles remained, trying to be careful to use only so much detergent as required one extra rinse. The diapers still stink.
We strip intermittently (every several months when the stink becomes absolutely atrocious) with RLR in the bathtub. We use this guide: https://clothdiapersforbeginners.com/faq/what-is-rlr/. This is a full 24 hour process with our ~38-46 pocket diapers. It worked the first few times. When we stripped a couple weeks ago, the stink was back in a day. So frustrating after all that work!
@Mast asked what temperature we wash. We have replaced our washer since last year and I have been using the “hot” cycle this year, at 120F / 50C. Our old washer from last year seemed to be malfunctioning and always using cold water regardless of my temperature selection. The diapers have not improved despite all these hot water washes. I'm unwilling to set our water heater higher and risk scalding us and our child when running the water.
@j4nd3r53n mentioned cloth nappies, boiling, and vinegar as a water softener. We have been placing about a cup of white vinegar in each wash for the past several months. This seemed to be helping for a while (the diapers still stunk but didn't seem to be worsening as fast) but in the end, the vinegar did not prevent increased stink and we gave up adding it.
I have some prefolds and flour sack towels we use intermittently when stripping the pocket diapers. I find these a big pain to use. They don't stay in place and they are a process to put on. Bottom line they don't work for me. I wish they did and then I could try boiling diapers as suggested.
@anongoodnurse suggested Borax as a water softener. I haven't tried Borax due to concerns about risks that resulted in it being banned in the UK and EU.
I have not tried baking soda as a water softener / additive.
In sum, adding vinegar (acidic element) doesn't work. Hot (120F/50C) water doesn't work. Adjusting (lowering) the detergent doesn't work, and associated fiddling with number of rinsing cycles doesn't work. Now even stripping with RLR doesn't work.
It's possible I don't have a detergent buildup problem like I thought, at least maybe not anymore. There isn't really suds in the water when stripping. The water does turn pale brown-yellow though.
Despite the pocket diapers' obvious filth, our daughter has not had any issues with rashes from the diapers.
Struggling with our wash routine has been a very frustrating and futile experience. Maybe the water is too hard or too cool, but it's all guesswork anyway.
If anyone can direct me to some research on how to wash pocket diapers... instead of guesses about what's wrong... I'd appreciate it.