Timeline for As a teenager, how do I communicate with my mom about her yelling?
Current License: CC BY-SA 3.0
15 events
| when toggle format | what | by | license | comment | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Sep 21, 2016 at 18:49 | comment | added | Pharap | @ThorbjørnRavnAndersen No it isn't, you simply stop heading where you're going and either make her drive instead or find another means to reach your destination. | |
| Sep 21, 2016 at 10:00 | comment | added | Thorbjørn Ravn Andersen | If you cannot drive the car without her in the seat "get out of the car" is quite an empty threat. | |
| Oct 28, 2015 at 14:54 | history | undeleted | Pharap | ||
| Oct 28, 2015 at 14:53 | history | deleted | Pharap | via Vote | |
| Mar 20, 2015 at 9:53 | comment | added | Pharap | @Joe I'm just going to chalk this difference of opinion up to cultural differences. We could discuss it for days but that's not what the comment section is for. | |
| Mar 19, 2015 at 17:20 | comment | added | Joe | Being a mother does give you some rights to tell your children what to do. It doesn't make this right, but it is unwise to ignore the power relationship when considering conflict. | |
| Mar 19, 2015 at 16:25 | comment | added | user11394 | I don't think it's okay to insist that someone gets out of your vehicle unless they are being a physical danger to the driver. To me, it's reactive and immature. I won't give this a -1, but I would suggest saying something more along the lines of "Either you can drive, or you can stop yelling at me and I can drive." rather than "Get of the the car". This way you're suggesting a solution rather than a new problem. | |
| Mar 19, 2015 at 15:28 | comment | added | Pharap | @Joe I wouldn't think twice about it if my own mother was acting the way the OP describes. Being a mother doesn't give her the right to bark out orders like that. | |
| Mar 19, 2015 at 15:03 | comment | added | Joe | I think that telling your mother to get out of the car is probably inappropriate, because it's your mother: she does have a position of responsibility here. I very much agree with pulling over, though, and getting out yourself. | |
| Mar 19, 2015 at 11:48 | comment | added | Acire | True -- there could be a lot of different reasons why she is yelling (nervous about riding as a passenger with a still-learning driver, had a bad day and feeling stressed, authentically angry...) and the appropriate response would depend on that root cause. Definitely not an easy thing to judge from a few paragraphs on the internet, but the OP should be better able to evaluate the situation :) | |
| Mar 19, 2015 at 11:45 | comment | added | Pharap | @Erica It depends entirely on how reasonable she is. I'm presuming that if she's not reasonable enough to accept simply being told that her yelling is a problem then a bit of shock factor could be what she needs. | |
| Mar 19, 2015 at 11:40 | comment | added | Acire | I don't know if I'd tell her to get out, but I absolutely do suggest pulling over at the earliest opportunity and keeping the car stopped until she acknowledges that her yelling is causing a dangerous driving situation. This turns it from confrontational ("get out of the car") into proof of responsible driving ("I need to concentrate on being a safe driver and yelling causes a dangerous distraction"). | |
| Mar 19, 2015 at 9:49 | history | edited | Pharap | CC BY-SA 3.0 |
Alternative option
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| Mar 19, 2015 at 9:48 | comment | added | Layna | I do consider this a quiet aggressive way to put the point across but.. my mom did that to HER father. and it DID work. | |
| Mar 19, 2015 at 9:44 | history | answered | Pharap | CC BY-SA 3.0 |