Timeline for How to persuade my father to stop physically abusing my mother?
Current License: CC BY-SA 3.0
33 events
| when toggle format | what | by | license | comment | |
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| S Mar 17, 2016 at 12:00 | history | suggested | paradigmBreaking | CC BY-SA 3.0 |
Removed unimportant information
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| Mar 15, 2016 at 1:08 | review | Suggested edits | |||
| S Mar 17, 2016 at 12:00 | |||||
| Dec 29, 2014 at 8:07 | answer | added | ilea | timeline score: 2 | |
| Oct 24, 2014 at 16:02 | answer | added | Tiffany | timeline score: 1 | |
| Aug 6, 2014 at 23:56 | answer | added | user9526 | timeline score: 4 | |
| Jul 11, 2014 at 5:55 | comment | added | Erik Kowal | What is the country in question? | |
| Jul 10, 2014 at 16:34 | comment | added | Marc | Many problems have no easy answer, and some have no answer at all. I expect this problem has no answer at all. If you can get your mother to leave him and join you, that would probably be best, but if she won't and would cut off communication with you, then it isn't a solution, and there is no other. You can't help someone who doesn't want help and is in a position to refuse it. | |
| Jul 10, 2014 at 8:37 | answer | added | Thomas | timeline score: 1 | |
| Jul 10, 2014 at 8:32 | answer | added | Thomas | timeline score: 4 | |
| Jul 9, 2014 at 15:46 | comment | added | Mason Wheeler | You can see no way forward because there isn't one, not within the parameters you've set. I grew up in a similar environment, and if he's been doing it for years, the only thing that will actually work is to get him out of her life, preferably with the help of law enforcement. If you can get him locked up until he's too old to hurt her anymore, everyone wins, even your mom, even if she doesn't agree. I have painful and acute memories of what it's like to love an abuser, and I didn't understand why we had to leave until a lot later, but it was the best thing that ever happened for my life. | |
| S Jul 9, 2014 at 12:07 | history | suggested | Muhd | CC BY-SA 3.0 |
Better title
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| Jul 9, 2014 at 10:36 | comment | added | Michael Borgwardt | @SalvadorDali: no, no, a hundred times NO!!! That is the most dangerously idiotic thing I have read all day! Escalating the violence is NOT a solution in any sense unless you're willing to kill the guy and go to prison over it. Otherwise you're just as likely to cause him to use lethal violence as to scare him into stopping. Oh, and of course as Tim says that "crap" people like this usually were made so by their own parents through the application of violence. | |
| Jul 9, 2014 at 1:50 | review | Suggested edits | |||
| S Jul 9, 2014 at 12:07 | |||||
| Jul 8, 2014 at 22:27 | comment | added | Salvador Dali | I assume that my comment will not have much of a support, but nonetheless. People like this are crap. Mostly they are weak and try to show their strength by hurting others. They can not understand anything else except of violence (any normal negotiation they count as weakness and will try to exploit it). If I were you I would find some people in a nearby boxing club who could beat the stupidity out of him. Only fear can stop this guy. I know that this is kind of illegal but if options like speaking with your mother or calling a police does not suit you, in my opinion this is an option. | |
| Jul 8, 2014 at 17:14 | answer | added | user9340 | timeline score: 1 | |
| Jul 8, 2014 at 15:17 | answer | added | Marcus Hansson | timeline score: 7 | |
| Jul 8, 2014 at 12:43 | comment | added | Tim Seguine | I would caution you that statistically children who had abusive parents are more likely to become abusive parents. I sincerely hope you can help your mother, but at the very least do your best to not live by his example. | |
| Jul 8, 2014 at 11:02 | vote | accept | gone-tomorrow | ||
| Jul 8, 2014 at 10:53 | history | edited | gone-tomorrow | CC BY-SA 3.0 |
more info, again
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| Jul 8, 2014 at 10:46 | history | edited | gone-tomorrow | CC BY-SA 3.0 |
more info
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| Jul 8, 2014 at 7:57 | answer | added | nickalh | timeline score: 19 | |
| Jul 8, 2014 at 7:57 | history | edited | Shadow Wizard | CC BY-SA 3.0 |
added 1 character in body; edited tags; edited title
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| Jul 8, 2014 at 5:45 | answer | added | Erran Morad | timeline score: 1 | |
| Jul 7, 2014 at 21:30 | comment | added | domokun | I don't have a solution for you, but I can tell you that giving him a monthly fee would not do any good. A cousin of mine have been in this situation (she was the bride), and provided a steady cash flow to this "man". Every month he wanted more, and nothing else changed. I can only agree with @kleineg, it's more merciful to let her suffer from the separation than from the beatings. | |
| Jul 7, 2014 at 19:35 | comment | added | kleineg | Your mother will be hurt by being convinced to leave or having him removed, but she will be hurt a lot less than enduring his abuse. The level and frequency you suggest makes it unlikely that he can be reformed, getting her out of that situation is the best thing you can do. | |
| Jul 7, 2014 at 19:33 | comment | added | kleineg | The domestic violence helpline (as suggested below) is a good start, I would start with them but do not be surprised if they recommend taking legal action by contacting the police. It dos not sound like your mother is safe in that situation. | |
| S Jul 7, 2014 at 18:40 | history | suggested | CommunityBot | CC BY-SA 3.0 |
fixing typos and tenses
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| Jul 7, 2014 at 18:36 | review | Suggested edits | |||
| S Jul 7, 2014 at 18:40 | |||||
| Jul 7, 2014 at 18:16 | history | edited | user420 | CC BY-SA 3.0 |
deleted 528 characters in body
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| Jul 7, 2014 at 17:24 | history | tweeted | twitter.com/#!/StackParenting/status/486199199076462593 | ||
| Jul 7, 2014 at 16:28 | answer | added | Karl Bielefeldt | timeline score: 27 | |
| Jul 7, 2014 at 15:33 | review | First posts | |||
| Jul 7, 2014 at 18:32 | |||||
| Jul 7, 2014 at 15:17 | history | asked | gone-tomorrow | CC BY-SA 3.0 |