Is it drying by towel? As a kid I hated having someone else wiping my face clean, it felt so invasive, demeaning and uncomfortable (and to be honest I think I just got used to fighting it).

The washing... I don't know. Maybe give him the option to do it himself?

The towel might be a bit to vigorous for his taste (not an accusation! I'm sure you're gentle). Here's some thoughts:

• I've seen head band towels, like an over sized cotton headband with loose elastic. Would he be willing to just wear that like a hat for 10 mins? Explain that it's an alternative, and he gets to choose the lesser evil (I think it's a woman's beauty product, but don't tell him!)
• Buzz cut the hair and let the drying situation subside, maybe in a few months he'll feel more comfortable with it.
• Try patting the hair instead of rubbing it (if that's not already what you're doing)
• See a doctor if maybe he has a scalp condition that might be making the washing and hair drying process somewhat painful. Is brushing the hair ok?

Is it drying by towel? As a kid I hated having someone else wiping my face clean, it felt so invasive, demeaning and uncomfortable (and to be honest I think I just got used to fighting it).

The washing... I don't know. Maybe give him the option to do it himself?

The towel might be a bit too vigorous for his taste (not an accusation! I'm sure you're gentle). Here are some thoughts:

• I've seen head band towels, like an oversized cotton headband with loose elastic. Would he be willing to just wear that like a hat for ten minutes? Explain that it's an alternative, and he gets to choose the lesser evil. (I think it's a woman's beauty product, but don't tell him!)
• Buzz cut the hair and let the drying situation subside, maybe in a few months he'll feel more comfortable with it.
• Try patting the hair instead of rubbing it (if that's not already what you're doing).
• See a doctor if maybe he has a scalp condition that might be making the washing and hair drying process somewhat painful. Is brushing the hair okay?