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Is “hot saucing” bad parenting?
@a_hardin and Adam Davis, I completely agree with you. Developmentally, four year olds can understand simple cause and effect. Children can understand that at far younger ages, and it is incorrect to assume that even a child with "lazy parents" doesn't understand cause and effect.
What should children call a step-grandparent?
Dunk, after reading your question and all of the comments you have made, it really seems like this is a personal issue for you which can't be solved in this arena. As I see it, you want a new name for Mr. Joe to endear him to the family, but not welcome him in enough to give him the name of "grandpa", or any of the other variants of that name. Michael F. made some great points, but if tltles mean that much to you, I would suggest you just stick with "Mr. Joe" and explain to your mother why a marriage doesn't make a grandfather.