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Jan
10
answered How to break the cycle of lies?
Jan
9
comment How to break the cycle of lies?
What is his attitude while he is lying, and what is his attitude at other times? Does he seem generally happy when he does it? resentful? fearful? stubborn? teasing? Does he look right at you with wide eyes? Most importantly, does it seem like he thinks he is fooling you? (You see where I'm going with this... wondering whether he's caught up in the cycle himself, is unaware there is a cycle, or feels he is being kept on too tight a leash and has found this way to push your buttons/get some freedom.)
Jan
9
revised Helping my Whirling Dervish to slow down
added 681 characters in body
Jan
7
revised How can self-consciousness be taught?
added 670 characters in body
Jan
7
comment How can self-consciousness be taught?
You are not specifically trying to get your child to want the approval of whoever-happens-to-be-around-him-right-now at all. You want to teach a child to be a good friend, and in general to be kind and considerate, the same way you teach a child to be honest and brave. If you teach your child these things, he will be a pleasure to be around, and other children will want to be friends with him.
Jan
6
comment What to do when an eight-year old says “sorry” in a not sorry voice
+1 for "Should I believe you right now? What are you actually apologizing for and what promise are you making right now?" I like that instead of accusing the child of not sounding sorry (a sure way to start a "verbal fight"), you are asking the child for more information -- less in that for the child to take umbrage at, but not letting it go, either.
Jan
6
awarded  Critic
Jan
6
comment What do you say when your child says “You're mean!”
I have a work friend who also says this, very cheerfully, whenever she gets this, but I've never seen her with her kids, so I can't tell whether I like it or not. By which I mean: for her kids; I know it doesn't fit my daughter's personality. (I thought it sounded cool, so I tried it, and she asked, with tears in her eyes, "Why would you want to be mean to me?" I thought "Good question" and apologized, backtracked, and tried something else. But I can see it might fit some other parent-kid personality combination.
Jan
3
comment How do you respond to your pre-schooler when they tell you that you're on Santa's Naughty List?
I hope you don't mind: I just broadened this question (I think... though maybe that's not the part you were interested in?) and posted it in that form. I'm really interested in this, so I hope you'll keep us up to date on how your "naughty parent" situation turns out.
Jan
3
asked What do you say when your child says “You're mean!”
Jan
3
comment How do I convince a stubborn 8 year old that the parents are supposed to be in charge?
Poking around, I found the following related question; you could see if it helps... parenting.stackexchange.com/q/3628/4975
Jan
3
answered How do you respond to your pre-schooler when they tell you that you're on Santa's Naughty List?
Jan
2
comment How do I convince a stubborn 8 year old that the parents are supposed to be in charge?
Is it that she always does what you say if you give her a reason? Can you come up with quick standard reasons to give her ("It's not safe." "It's healthy for you." "It's too much work for me.") that will work when you want to say, "Because I said so?"
Jan
2
comment When a child only gets enthused about books above his reading level
I truly believe that few kids actually enjoy reading at this learning stage. Even the reading prodigies among us, who only seem like they skip this stage because they go through it so young (no one is giving a 36-month old reading homework they must do). If you still read to them, and they love that, and they see that you love to read, then they will in their hearts believe you (no matter what they say when frustrated) when you tell them that they will love it too, once their reading pathways have formed. The "I hate reading" I got was not pleasant, but by 2nd grade I had a reader.
Jan
1
answered When a child only gets enthused about books above his reading level
Dec
25
awarded  Nice Question
Dec
24
comment How to stop my 8 year old from crying every time she's frustrated?
It could also be that she just learned that one of her friends does this with her parents and it works (a lot of the time) to get what she wants.
Dec
24
awarded  Enlightened
Dec
24
awarded  Nice Answer
Dec
24
comment Should I tell my 11-year-old daughter that Santa isn't real?
+1 for suggesting she might already know the deal, and thinks that talking about Santa is an okay way to ask for more stuff. However, I might poll her friends' parents to get a feel for how likely this is before I had any discussion that relied on it. And even then I would be gentle.