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552140
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location Pennsylvania
age 40
visits member for 3 years
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Moderator Pro Tem on Parenting.Stackexchange.com.

Web developer, business analyst, project manager, and proud father.

profile for Beofett on Stack Exchange, a network of free, community-driven Q&A sites


Oct
3
comment What are the pros and cons of a chicken-pox party vs immunization?
Irony: My wife and I opted to give our son the vaccine at his first year checkup. Two weeks later and he now has a mild case of chicken pox :(
Sep
29
comment Is there any scientific evidence in favor of co-sleeping with children?
I don't think it is a bad answer, just not as good as the votes would indicate (as-is). Adding some references to it would be a great help... thanks!
Sep
29
comment Is there any scientific evidence in favor of co-sleeping with children?
Quite frankly, I don't understand why this answer has so many upvotes. The question is asking for scientific evidence. Saying that a google search shows that lots of people think co-sleeping is a good idea doesn't actually answer the question at all.
Sep
27
comment How do my wife and I stop our son from learning to swear from us?
Great answer, thanks!
Sep
24
comment Can temper tantrums indicate a behavior problem?
The question was "can tantrums indicate a problem". Your answer seems to be taking a clear stance that if a child is throwing tantrums, then it is because the parents taught them that tantrums are an effective way to get what they want. Your answer, particularly with your comment about how none of your children ever had a tantrum, seems to be denying that tantrums are ever normal. I think your advice is good for many parents but I suspect there are lots tantrums that arent the result of parents "giving in". I didnt downvote, but I think you make too many assumptions.
Sep
23
comment How should we cope with 12 month old waking in the night?
@Dan we were lucky, and it took us less than an hour. However, I understand some parents go several hours in the first few nights. Rather than duration, I'd go by your son's level of distress. If he's getting to the point where he sounds like he's crying so hard he's gagging, I'd stop (although many pediatricians will say gagging is not something that will physically endanger a child). If he's just sobbing, but not hard enough that he's at the point of breathlessness, I'd be inclined to continue until he sleeps, or it is time to get up.
Sep
23
comment Can temper tantrums indicate a behavior problem?
I fully agree that a range of "23%-83%" is, well, bizarre. I can only guess that it reflects a range resulting from multiple studies. Unfortunately, the source, while referencing many of its statements, does not reference that one. However, the point was that many (even the low-end of that range I would consider common enough to argue that "relatively normal" would be accurate) children have temper tantrums, and I believe it is unfair to take 100% of the parents of children who have had even a single tantrum and say "you're doing it wrong!"
Sep
23
comment Can temper tantrums indicate a behavior problem?
"Normal" != "every single child has them". "Twenty-three to 83 percent of all 2- to 4-year-olds have occasional temper tantrums."
Sep
22
comment How should we cope with 12 month old waking in the night?
@Dan that's perfectly normal at that age. Our son (who just turned 1) stands at the edge of his crib whenever we put him to bed, and literally bounces up and down laughing until he gets tired and lays down to go to sleep. Standing the whole time only means that he'll get tired a little more quickly.
Sep
21
comment How do my wife and I stop our son from learning to swear from us?
I have edited to address the issues raised, and hopefully make this question more on-target for parenting.
Sep
21
comment How do my wife and I stop our son from learning to swear from us?
Please refer to my question on meta and voice your opinion!
Sep
21
comment How do my wife and I stop our son from learning to swear from us?
That being said, I am open to feedback for either improving the question, or, alternately, opening a new question that is more firmly on-topic (although a new question would have to avoid duplicating this one).
Sep
21
comment How do my wife and I stop our son from learning to swear from us?
@William not at all. I appreciate your feedback, and I feel this is a question that is rather on the edge of our guidelines. On the one hand, it deals with an issue raised specifically for parenting (best way to avoid teaching a child to swear), and is looking for strategies that will be specifically helpful to parents in general. On the other hand, it is, as you point out, geared towards changing the behavior of the parents, and therefore could be just as valid in non-parenting situations.
Sep
21
comment How do my wife and I stop our son from learning to swear from us?
@William that's perfectly valid, and I had actually just commented in chat that I could see it as being only tangentially related to parenting.
Sep
21
comment How do my wife and I stop our son from learning to swear from us?
I think so, but my cousin's son's kindergarten teacher apparently didn't find the f-bomb being dropped in class as amusing as either of us did! :)
Sep
21
comment How do my wife and I stop our son from learning to swear from us?
Ah, that makes sense. I agree about teaching about appropriate use being the best strategy. However, I think that between the ages of 1 and maybe 4-5 (guesses, since I'm not there yet) it seems that it will be easier for my son to learn to parrot what we say than to grasp the concept that "some words shouldn't be said in front of teachers or other children".
Sep
21
comment How do my wife and I stop our son from learning to swear from us?
@ChristopherBibbs If they happen to be the "right" words to express what you are feeling, of course it will be difficult to switch to something less expressive :)
Sep
21
comment Recommended reading for first-time father?
On these Stack Exchange sites, questions are usually about specific problems you are facing. This is a very broad, generalized poll of the community and not really appropriate for this type of Q&A site. I have to close this, but if you have other questions about parenting, please feel free to try again. Thanks.
Sep
21
comment At what age is it safe to have toys in a baby's crib?
@William If you would like to continue this discussion, I would be happy to continue in chat.
Sep
20
comment At what age is it safe to have toys in a baby's crib?
@WilliamGrobman That is exactly the point that seems to be causing confusion. SIDS has an unknown cause. Suffocating on toys is a known cause of death (as is suffocating on anything else). The point isn't "toys are safe and you can't possibly suffocate on them". Nowhere did I claim, or even imply that. Instead, I am commenting on the confusion between suffocating on toys, and SIDS, which are two completely different things. Which is exactly what I said in my first comment that you disputed.