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Jan
25
comment How to deal with a teenage daughter who refuses to dress modestly
"Sex is about power, not sexual desire": That gets repeated like a matra, but never with a justification. Maybe prison rape is such a case, and probably there are perverts out there who rape for the fun of humiliating and hurting. On the other hand, many rape cases, especially date rape, are about one party wanting to have sex while the other doesn't. I strongly suspect that most guys picking up drunk girls do it because they have a sexual desire, not because they have a desire to humiliate someone. If they didn't want sex, they would leave and find someone else if the girl is consenting.
Jan
25
comment How to deal with a teenage daughter who refuses to dress modestly
@Ida: I like your comment on being taking seriously by adults. That won't work with all of the peers though. What I've seen is that there is a lot of peer pressure to dress a certain way. Many girls suffer terribly because they think they are not attractive enough. A teenage girl should begin to understand the signals she is sending, and she should know that certain things are very very attractive to men and will overshadow her other values. I really hate seeing people defined by their looks, and we have to teach that while it is the easiest way to get attention, it is not a good way (alone).
Jan
25
comment How to deal with a teenage daughter who refuses to dress modestly
There are several strategies for crime reduction, these are Avoidance (risk aversion), Defense (guns, no good), Detection (open talks with your kids so you know when something bad is going on) and Denial (chaperone). Being honest and open about ones sexuality does not exclude being careful and avoiding bad situations. For example, I have no moral reason against going home with someone you just met in a bar. I would not like my daughter to do this, but it is not immoral and I would not blame her for the sexual aspect. While not morally wrong, it is still bloody stupid because it is dangerous.
Jan
25
comment How to deal with a teenage daughter who refuses to dress modestly
Hi dbmag9: We all want our loved ones to be save, this is why we 'blame' and 'shame' unsafe behavior. Just as we would blame someone who got mugged jogging through Central Park at night, or someone (myself), who forgot to close the car window. Giving advice to people to avoid becoming victims doesn't make the criminal act or the criminal less despicable, but we cannot control those people, only punish them after the fact. I don't know if (some) men just can't control themselves, or don't care about the suffering of their victims, probably both. Why risk it?
Mar
7
comment How can you preserve old teddy bear for eternity?
You can put him in a bell jar with an airtight lid to keep out humidity and insects. Add some desiccant bags. Don't put the glass in the sun, or the colors will bleach out.
Dec
12
awarded  Teacher
Dec
12
awarded  Custodian
Dec
12
reviewed Approve Are “glow in the dark” bedsheet safe
Dec
12
answered Are “glow in the dark” bedsheet safe
Dec
2
comment How should I wake up my 4 year old?
Make it a funny story: the washcloth lives at the north pole, hides on a ship to visit relatives in the south. On his way, he sees a nice and cozy bed and decides to take a little nap and warm up. In the future, you won't need to get the washcloth out of the freezer, the story will be enough.
Nov
23
answered How should I wake up my 4 year old?