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age 28
visits member for 2 years, 10 months
seen Apr 6 at 3:40

the cows are here to take me home now...


Oct
29
comment How can I prevent my 8-year-old from spending time with his bad friend?
@balancedmama Hm, well, maybe things are different in the States. Here in Canada they definitely go straight for reckless interventions and separations.
Oct
29
comment How can I prevent my 8-year-old from spending time with his bad friend?
@balancedmama Ultimately it may be that what really needs to change in child services is the way they're funded. It needs to be ensured that they won't ever be out of work just because neighborhoods and societies improve and their services aren't required as often as they might be now. Until that happens, child services to me is an absolute last resort -- not someone that I'd consult with casually the way I might a school counselor, or even the police.
Oct
29
comment How can I prevent my 8-year-old from spending time with his bad friend?
@balancedmama Obviously if I see my neighbor mercilessly flogging his kid, I'd call child services (or the cops), and they'd be hard-pressed to overreact to that. But I'm not letting child services off the hook for repeatedly going after the wrong families "because they're human"; certain organizations are more predisposed to making mistakes than they should be as an inherent result of their business model. My parents have considered fostering a teenager once as well, and having gone through CS, both their humanistic side and their businessman-like opportunist side were clear to see.
Jun
6
comment How can I prevent my 8-year-old from spending time with his bad friend?
@Werner -- I normally hate this phrase, but it's apposite now: times have changed. Talk of suicide and murder and terrorism is everywhere. Even games approved for kids like Worms or Portal are full of macabre humor. There's very little control over what kids see on the Internet, and even Wikipedia is chock full of shocking information and photos. Until you can find out for sure whether this kid's saying all this stuff because he's seen it on TV or because he's on his way to becoming a murderer, it's a responsibility to first do no harm. Pattern without context are just constellations.
Jun
6
comment How can I prevent my 8-year-old from spending time with his bad friend?
-1 -- jumping the gun. I would call the cops if and when it comes to that; I would never call child services. I'm not a parent myself, but from my parenting-like experiences, it's been my observation that their reputation for wrecking families by overreacting is well deserved. My suspicion is that it's a tendency they picked up in order to legitimize their work and ensure funding. It doesn't seem to be motivated by a family's best interests half the time.