5,407 reputation
822
bio website tomjedrz.com
location California
age 49
visits member for 3 years, 2 months
seen Jul 24 at 16:22
Husband, Father, Catholic ... also a corporate IT stooge, just waiting for the scorn and ridicule to be heaped upon me.

Mar
31
comment Fostering a relationship with a relative your child doesn't like
@PéterTörök Of course courtesy is a means, not an end. But it is most necessary when it is most difficult. The (nonsensical IMHO) concern about "repressing inner feelings" essentially gives one an excuse to be rude at the times when courtesy is most needed!
Mar
30
comment Fostering a relationship with a relative your child doesn't like
@morahhochman Keeping ones feelings to oneself at inappropriate times is exactly the skill that you need to be teaching. It is a truly necessary skill for getting along with others.
Mar
30
comment Fostering a relationship with a relative your child doesn't like
@PéterTörök When one is uncomfortable or irritated or angry are the times when politeness and courtesy are most necessary. It is easy to be friendly and polite to someone you like. The real test of character is our ability to be courteous and polite to people we do not like or do not respect.
Mar
30
answered Fostering a relationship with a relative your child doesn't like
Mar
30
comment Guided Meditation for Children
I am sure you can figure something out ...
Mar
28
answered How to promote individual play for a toddler?
Mar
28
comment How can you deal with tantrums without spanking?
And in the meantime your kid inflicts all manner of unpleasantness on those around you unable to ignore it. Who exactly is in charge in your family? Part of parenting is teaching your child respect for your authority and that inappropriate actions have consequences. Your child is learning neither when you ignore his tantrums.
Mar
28
comment How can you deal with tantrums without spanking?
@JeffAtwood ... it has been 10 months, and you said "we try ...". Has it worked?
Mar
28
comment How do you wash a toddler's hands in a public restroom?
+1 Nice idea .. I hadn't thought of that.
Mar
27
comment What do we do when timeouts are not effective?
A friend once told me that as parents, you get "lots of at bats". You don't have to get it right every time, but you have to keep trying. A single error does little harm, but consistent errors do great harm.
Mar
27
comment What do we do when timeouts are not effective?
@AskBjørnHansen You miss my point. You need to parent, to exercise authority, and to be in control when your child is young. The police officer who gives you a traffic citation for driving too fast is not "resolving conflict", he is enforcing the rules and exercising authority. And next time, you are going to slow down on the that street.
Mar
26
comment What do we do when timeouts are not effective?
Parental discipline is not about resolving conflict, it is about managing behavior and teaching proper responses to parental authority. The child learning that yelling at Mommy results in a shoulder pinch does not translate into child thinking it is OK to punch an irritating classmate. Mine didn't.
Mar
26
comment What do we do when timeouts are not effective?
@mmr The methods can be applied independent of one's religiosity ... they are entirely behavioral. Corporal punishment is advocated because, in his view, when properly done it is effective. My experience confirms this. Be aware that properly done includes never, ever, using corporal punishment when angry.
Mar
26
comment What do we do when timeouts are not effective?
The kid is THREE .. discussion, persuasion and explanation do not work. The chart isn't a bad idea though.
Mar
25
revised My toddler is waking up with crust on the inside of her eyes, should I be concerned?
added 838 characters in body
Mar
25
answered My toddler is waking up with crust on the inside of her eyes, should I be concerned?
Mar
25
comment How do you prepare for the “terrible twos”?
Disagree .. this isn't about teaching the kid to express themselves .. it is about teaching the child to control their behavior. I never had any trouble knowing what my two-year-old daughter wanted.
Mar
25
comment How do you prepare for the “terrible twos”?
You don't. There is no preparation. Be afraid, be very afraid. ;-) Seriously .. search the site for "tantrum". Remember .. parenting requires courage! Good luck.
Mar
25
comment How can we avoid tantrums over sweets and cakes?
-1 .. doesn't even pretend to answer the question, just lectures about the evils of sweets.
Mar
25
answered Guided Meditation for Children