5,259 reputation
622
bio website tomjedrz.com
location California
age 48
visits member for 2 years, 10 months
seen Mar 30 at 22:49
Husband, Father, Catholic ... also a corporate IT stooge, just waiting for the scorn and ridicule to be heaped upon me.

Jun
14
comment How do you teach a child religious views?
@Hairy .. for some things, absolute, unquestioning compliance is necessary. No stepping off the sidewalk. No wandering away from Dad in the store. Personal hygiene is required. Negotiating/persuading for these kinds of things is the wrong approach. Not being diligent and disciplined in making these things happen is lazy, ineffectual parenting. The trick is deciding what things to force and what to not force. Force personal hygiene. Force common courtesy and treating others with respect. Don't try to force feelings, or likes, or beliefs.
Jun
14
comment How do you teach a child religious views?
@Hairy .. quips aside .. do you take issue with the concept that sometimes compliance is the only acceptable alternative?
Jun
14
comment How do you teach a child religious views?
@Hairy .. seriously? Washing of hands after visiting the rest room is optional in your family? Remind me not to shake hands if we ever meet.
Jun
14
comment How do you teach a child religious views?
-1 (if I could) for the "don't teach them your faith", don't send them to religious education nonsense. Parents are supposed to teach. Sometimes teaching happens when the child asks. Sometimes it happens when the teacher makes it happen. Both are important.
Jun
14
comment How do you teach a child religious views?
+1 - I upvoted to offset a downvote, because I sense some religious hostility in the comments. You all are forgetting that to those of us who believe, our beliefs are the truth. So we teach them as the truth, the truth to us, and hope our children come to the same understanding.
Jun
14
comment How do you teach a child religious views?
+1 - Nicely written.
Jun
14
comment How do you teach a child religious views?
@Hairy Parenting by negotiation and persuasion doesn't work with toddlers. For heavens sake, washing of hands after visiting the rest room is not negotiable. If they don't, take a baby wipe to their hands and punish them.
Jun
14
comment What is the least problematic age difference between siblings?
You are overthinking the matter. Good parenting will produce good children regardless of the spacing, and vice versa. You want another child ... have another child. The last thing you want to do is make it about the other child(ren).
Jun
14
awarded  Commentator
Jun
14
comment How can we discipline a strong-willed, misbehaving 5 year-old?
+1 for the clear and actionable response! However, don't get carried away with the warnings. Once the child knows that (for instance) shouting in public is not OK, stop warning and go directly to punishment.
Jun
14
answered How do I stop my daughter from hitting another child?
Jun
14
awarded  Citizen Patrol
Jun
13
awarded  Teacher
Jun
10
comment How can you deal with tantrums without spanking?
@Ilari ... Being able to express emotions doesn't mean being free to express emotions in any way desired at any time desired. Parents must teach kids when and how such expression is appropriate. Tantrums are about power. Most come about in an attempt to get an unsatisfied want of one form or another satisfied. Kids are smart and learn quickly. If a kid figures out that a tantrum gets Mom to give them a cookie, tantrums become a tool to get cookies. If instead a tantrum gets the kid a whack on the bottom and a seat in the time out chair, tantrums won't happen too often.
Jun
10
comment How can you deal with tantrums without spanking?
@Ilari .. OK .. we can't hurt the kid's self esteem with the bad label .. we might damage them permanently. Call it "undesired" behavior. But your "no alternative" idea is nonsense .. the "desired" behavior is to not throw the tantrum. Oh my heavens .. leaving an emotion unexpressed .. we can't have that .. our kid might become repressed.
Jun
1
awarded  Editor
Jun
1
comment How do we help our toddler to sleep through the night?
Fixed the number of thoughts. I had a third but thought better of it.
Jun
1
revised How do we help our toddler to sleep through the night?
Only two thoughts.
Jun
1
comment How can you deal with tantrums without spanking?
I agree with punishing the undesired behavior, but you also mentioned distraction and ignoring, with which I don't agree.
May
31
answered How do we help our toddler to sleep through the night?