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You absolutely need to seek professional help. The fact that he is forcing other children to perform sexual activities indicates that this is a VERY serious problem that you need to address immediately. Try to find a psychologist, councilor, or social worker who specializes in working with children. If they feel they aren't the right people to help you, ...

Well, I went the carrot/condom route with my daughter when she was 12, along with discussing the following: Condoms are only effective when used properly. This means, no baby oil for lube, no vaseline or anything petroleum - as it will rot the rubber and cause it to break. Insist that a condom is used! If he's not willing to see to your safety and health ...

Make discussions age appropriate. Scale up the detail as they get older. NEVER LIE TO THEM. Just leave out details. My kids were all born about 3 years apart. This left ample time for each of the previous children to ask questions typical of their age group. Answering their question on the same level is always best. An almost-3-year-old asking, "how ...

I've typically seen condom use demonstrated on (unpeeled) bananas, but I think @MichaelF's suggestion of a carrot is a better one. I'd even consider purchasing a ("regular" size) realistic-looking dildo, since what you lose in giggle factor you more than make up for with realism. As for storage precautions, I'd point out that carrying a condom in a wallet ...

My immediate thought is that a sex movie is like any other movie: It's fake and make-believe, created only to provide entertainment to the viewer. Take Notting Hill as an example. Just like in any other movie, the actors are paid to follow a script. They must perform actions and pretend to have emotions and reactions. Just because it looks real in the movie ...

Well, it came from somewhere. Someone, at some point, showed him those things in the best case or did such things to him in the worst case. Can't throw accusations around and it doesn't really matter now - the damage has been done, and must be fixed as soon as possible by professional help as Beofett suggested. What I wanted to add is that in such age this ...

With the current state of the internet, children are increasingly exposed to all levels of pornography whether they mean to or not. A simple mis-spelling of common websites such as "Fecabook.com" (easy to mis-type, not what you expected) can result in children seeing graphic pictures and videos. Pornography is often the first time young people have seen ...

First, you need to do the whole birds and the bees talk. You can't run before you can walk, and if a child hasn't received a suitable grounding in this then the rest will be a real problem to distinguish. On the asumption that the purely biological process is understood by the child (not something I have done yet with mine, but that's a whole other ...

If the kids are that young, they're not likely to understand enough of the "rules" around showing affection to be confused. This is coming from the dual experience of being the child in that situation, and from being around while a friend of mine (with two kids around the same age) split from her husband to start dating again. In the second case, the ...

If he is 12 then it is a PERFECT time to have the sex talks with him. When my boy was 4 he walked in on us in the middle of the night, should have still been asleep. He is now 12 and still remembers but he doesn't seem to be any more or less interested or disturbed about that subject matter than other kids his age. He talks about it as if it was mater of ...

I'm answering as someone who was involved in sex play as a child. I feel that my experience is particularly useful in this discussion because it was fully benign (or so it seemed) and consensual. Struggling with the memory was complicated beyond what I can easily explain here. To begin with, I had lots of sexual thoughts through the ages of 4 to 12 and ...

As soon as they start asking questions or show curiosity. Younger kids don't understand psychological aspects of sex, so wording might be different, when you talk about sex with six-year old and with a teenager. But it is perfectly OK to explain ehm... basic mechanics of sex, or pregnancy 101, as soon as the kid asks questions.

I have been in a simular situation with my daughter and a female friend when they were 5 and 4. The friend wanted to see what could fit into my daughter. I am also not in a situation to keep them from playing together. I took my daughter to the doctor because she was complaining afterward that it hurt. the doctor and I together had a discussion with her ...

When teaching the practical use of condoms I suggest one takes the opportunity to teach the life skill of deciding in advance as well. Maybe these points will be helpful to cover. Use of condoms, if used properly: prevents pregnancies; pregnancy is life altering, take a moment to imagine your life pregnant (or with a pregnant girlfriend) and with a ...

One item everyone seems to forget to cover, is how to take one OFF without making a huge mess. And to wash hands before applying a new one after removing a used one for those back to back sessions we all wish we were able to have back when we had the stamina but not the wisdom to make them worth it.

Since she is asking, this may be a good opportunity to discuss with her the mechanics of human reproduction in detail: naming the body parts properly and explaining their functions in the process. You can also discuss with here what Auntie did wrong and how this could have been avoided. At this age kids a very non-sexual, so this may actually turn out to ...

You should be aware that shying away from any physical affection will be noticed by the children, and while they may not understand it, they will take something away from it. This may make them less comfortable of physical affection in the future, it may make them register that you are always uncomfortable - which could make them less comfortable around you, ...

Playing doctor is something all kids want to try at some point. Being kids, there's no harm in that as long as it's literally innocent play and they didn't get any ideas from others in advance. The answer about seeing "what can fit inside" sounds like one of those girls has seen more about purpose of the private parts than what a 4yo should know. If ...

This is completely normal, and it's not sexual for the kids. Kids don't know about sex, but they are curious and bodily things fascinate them. Ask any 4-year-old about the difference between boys and girls, and she will immediately tell you about penises and vaginas and boobs, cause as far as kids are concerned, those are the only differences (isn't that ...

This is my first post on this site. I don't have children, but I think I can speak from the perspective of having grown up with the internet in my house. You ask, "How to effectively explain pornography to a child". You mention that you are specifically concerned about your children being exposed to it on the internet. I think that before you can even ...

As a former sex-ed teacher (I don't know why the Science and PE teachers are ALWAYS relegated to this job, I would also add to some of the already wonderful and complete answers, that a lot of kids these days do not consider oral sex a form of sex. As awkward as it may be to discuss - do it bring it up. Even this form of sex requires certain protections ...

I would tackle it this way: Make sure that my children understand enough about sex to know that coitus serves a human reproductive function. Explain that sex is engaged in for non-reproductive reasons as well-- that it can be highly pleasurable and also can be an expression of deep sharing and intimacy between people, but that these are not necessarily ...

Apparently I have a slightly different take to many of the other posters, possibly because of an different age/culture background. The analogy I'd use is "Stunt Person". It's a job where you can get really badly hurt (i.e. diseases/pregnant), where it's not as much fun as it looks, where you often deal with slightly nasty people, and you should really only ...

Children are curious. This behavior is not necessarily "mimicking some behaviour that he probably shouldn't be witnessing". Humans are geared for sex, our brains are geared to think about sex and we have strong instincts toward sex. And children are sexual beings too. They are obviously not mature enough for it, but they do have curiosity towards it. It is ...

As for "what else": Teach them that there's nothing shameful about carrying condoms. That carrying condoms doesn't mean they'll definitely be using them. And that you (Dad) won't assume that they're having sex just because they take condoms with them when they're out. Yes, this is my story - I was a fairly convinced Christian back then, and it was ...