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1

In the case below, "it," is an action or behavior that is undesired/wrong. Blackmailing is: The person who did "it" knows they did something wrong. You know the person did "it," and that "it" is wrong. The person who did "it" knows that you know. Blackmailing--> You coerce behavior from the person who did "it" by threatening to expose the the person for ...


4

My principle is to try to stick to "natural consequences". That is, I do not punish my children in a way that makes me seem to be peeved, and therefore I punish them. Rather than that, I focus on why I want to correct my children's behavior, and try to let them feel what the consequences are if they behave incorrect. Mostly that's just not shielding the ...


4

I think that what your sister is getting at is the distinction between several kinds of discipline. Let's say that I want my child (let's call him Tommy) to eat a healthy dinner. How can I do that? "Tommy, if you eat (all of) your spinach, I'll let you have a cookie." "Tommy, if you don't eat your spinach, you can't have a cookie." These are inverses ...


2

The only really bad thing would be to threaten a punishment that you don't intend to carry through on or that is disproportionate to the offense. Punishment is not blackmail. The law does not blackmail us in to not stealing from other people. It tells us that if we do bad thing x, bad thing y will happen to us. This is a natural and important part of ...


13

The thing is, it sounds like blackmailing, but you are teaching that actions have consequences. "If you don't go to bed now you will be tired tomorrow" is a fact; however one that children won't get. Tomorrow is ages away and child cares mostly about now. But you actually know more about the child than it does when it is small, so you need to be able to ...


1

In my household I simply expect everybody to contribute. Of course, that's only according to their abilities, and of course children should have lots of free time left. But there are chores to be done, and some of them are done by the kids. Their sole incentive doing them is that they contribute to the community they live in. Over the years we have ...



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