Hot answers tagged

39

As the other answers suggested, it's very likely that whatever you put will come of as weird. Still, it's an honest and reasonable sentiment, so it's kind of frustrating that it can't be expressed as such. Here's my best effort (to be placed in relatively small print at the bottom of the invitation): Gifts are welcome, but not necessary. If you would like ...


24

I don't think you can really tactfully put it on the invitation. In fact, many would say the invitation shouldn't refer to gifts at all. Registries are quite often communicated by family members and not the invitation - although I find that silly, personally, and certainly would add it to mine. However, what I would typically do is ask your parents or ...


21

I personally don't think it's polite to invite people to a celebration while telling them how they should and shouldn't gift you. While I am not an atheist, I would still be somewhat taken aback by that kind of announcement on an invitation. The gifts at celebrations are certainly appreciated, and baby showers in particular are supposed to be oriented ...


14

While you should not lie, you can tell half truths. So rather than telling them about your lack of religious belief, you could instead tell them you were raised Jewish just like them. I would however suggest that you talk to your sister about it, tell her that you don't want to lie but want to respect her wishes, so if they do ask, how does she want you to ...


12

Live and let live. While you will obviously want to go along with the show at the bar mitzvah, if the nephews ever ask about your beliefs, I see no reason to lie, even by omission. If your sister's feelings are hurt because you tell your nephews that you do not believe in God, then quite frankly that's your sister's problem, not yours. Also, I'll disagree ...


8

If you have a registry, I assume that you will simply not include religious items on it. If people mostly buy from the registry, problem solved. I think it would be rude to say you don't want a certain type of gift, whether that is religious or whatever. Like if you said, "Please, no orange shirts, because I hate the color orange", I think that would be ...


8

The title of your post "How can I..." asks a slightly different question from the content, "should we say..." I will answer the latter. In a word, no. You should not mention it. Look at your fundamental motivation. You want to avoid causing your friends and family to waste money. That is an admirable desire, but how your extended family does or doesn't ...


8

I wonder, does your mom have other things to talk about? Clearly she used to. Have things changed? If they have, you can find things to do and talk about together. A book you're both reading, etc. You can't control how your mother speaks, how she thinks, what she believes, etc. You can only control your own actions. But you can talk to her about it, and you ...


6

At the moment its just a ritual like saying "please" or brushing hair; she is too young to understand the theology. Later you can discuss your beliefs (or lack of them) and the extent to which she should continue respecting her grandparents beliefs. If she notices that you don't follow this ritual then thats probably a good time to start explaining that you ...


5

"No religious gifts thanks!" I don't know what your friends are like, but I think many religious people would not be offended by knowing your preferences.


4

It is likely that at some point, children will naturally become interested in questions like "where did we come from", "why are we here" or even "why do people think there's a magical man in the sky" (It depends on who they hang out with.) Probably the best way to let them pick without imposing, is by telling them "lots of people believe lots of different ...


4

Possibly something along the lines of: Gift are welcome, but not necessary. If you do wish to bring a gift, please consider something from our Baby Shower Registry or a contribution to the baby college fund.


3

Hmm, if you have to have things for a baby, I would recommend a gift list for the baby, along with the following : Donations to baby college fund A donation to a hospital of gifts for newborns and moms in need. All gift-givers can either get gifts from the gift list , or even donate to the fund, since the child would want to get to a good college one ...


3

Money to start the college fund is a simple gesture that crosses all of the boundaries and leaves everyone unoffended. Not to mention, it is always the perfect size, regardless of who and where it comes from.


3

I think there are deep and fundamental questions that most of us ask at some point in our life, such as "Who am I?", "Where did I come from?", "What is my purpose?", etc. Most religions, and even science and philosophy, try to provide an answer to these questions I think it is best to let your child search for these answers on their own, by seeing what each ...


3

How do we cope with the inevitable talk about my grandmother having 'gone to heaven' during the eventual funeral and afterwards when will have explained things differently to my daughter? I would simply tell her the truth, and be prepared to tell her again and again, because she will ask/wonder about it again and again. The truth is that things die. ...


3

A great way not to offend religious attendees would be to adopt a religion yourself, preferably one that isn't culturally compatible with theirs. This might help others refrain from procuring gifts of their own religion, whilst not offending them all the same: My wife and I would like to thank you for attending. We would like to use this opportunity to ...


2

Since you self-identify as a Christian, I will presume to give you a Christian parenting answer on a secular site. You should primarily SHOW, not TELL your Christianity. In the Epistle from James we are told, "Pure religion and undefiled in the sight of God is this: to help widows and orphans in their distress, and to keep oneself unspotted by the ...


2

This problem seems to come up a lot, and I think it comes for a large part from what stuffe mentioned in his answer. People put religion on a special pedestal, like it's a more important/valid/respectable/believable thing than any other opinion people hold. This causes the situation to be approached very differently from most other discussions, because both ...


2

If you are mainly concerned about your child learning about religion, there is no need to baptize them for that purpose. You can not only teach them all you want them to learn about religion at home, you can also go to church with them without having made the promise of raising them Catholic (which is what a baptism is). Nobody will stop you from telling ...


2

Baptism is not an inculcation, but an expression of a commitment. If your child has not had their skills of knowledge between right and wrong developed, how can they commit (Hebrews 5:14)? More so, how can they follow the instruction to love with all their heart and soul (Deuteronomy 6:5)? If you must force your child to believe through any means, then ...


1

Explain it to him as it is, in such abusive environment where they rip the childhood out of the children you have no choice but to be honest as the damage has already been done. You should explain to him that he might get executed and those whom he love might get hanged, if he is smart enough to ask questions about Allah then he is smart enough to figure ...


1

You don't mention the ages of your children, but from my (extremely limited) understanding of Catholicism, I presume you are referring to baptism while they are still very young. My wife is christian. I am not (I'm not really religious at all, and have both specific and general concerns about most organized religions). My son was baptized as an infant. ...


1

First, it's extremely unlikely that a 2 year old really understands the issues and the logical, scientific, and historical arguments for and against any given religion or non-religion. I wouldn't try to burden her with difficult subjects beyond her understanding. Second, you have to consider just how far you want to go with this, considering that it will ...


1

I know many people who were raised religious and are atheists, and many others who grew up atheist and are religious. I'm personally religious despite grown up in a fairly skeptical household, and judging by your question, you are agnostic despite having been raised religious. Given that your child (and mine) will grow up in a world with both religious ...


1

Treat it like any other rule where you and society disagree on how to raise your child. Imagine if you said "I don't want my child to drink soda until she is 20", and go from there. Setting the rule Obviously in your own home, explain the rule and don't break it yourself (this should be fairly easy) For people your child is around a lot and who might ...


1

For a structured approach, the Unitarian Church has a good childhood education program that covers the beliefs of many different religions. You can find this online at their web site. That's probably a good place to start in terms of how to introduce children to the variety of human beliefs without emphasizing any particular one.


1

Speaking as a person from an extended family whose religion is different from my own, I think you have to decide whether you want to bring out into the forefront the fact that you have "strayed from the faith". In my case, my family is Catholic and I'm Protestant. Our cases are similar; Catholics don't believe anyone is going to heaven unless they are ...


1

Hmm, that seems a strange question to me. I'm a software developer and a scientifically-minded person, and I'm also a Fundamentalist Christian and a creationist. I don't see any contradiction there, it's more "I study and respect science, and THEREFORE I am a Christian". I have studied the evidence and this is where it leads me. Many of the greatest ...



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