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28

The simple answer, although I suspect it is the answer you don't want to hear, is that you need to limit your son's exposure to your friend's daughter, and make sure that the interactions are supervised (by you, not just your friend!). I have to admit I'm not familiar with the "Conscious and Peaceful Parenting Approach", but this has all the earmarks of ...


22

We take pictures or scan images to save digitally. We also have a set amount of space for saving artwork and crafts, a flat box about the size of a pizza box and a small shelf in her room. When those spaces get full, we weed some things out. I've found with my child that after she has had a little distance from her creations she is able to let go more ...


15

My daughter is 16 months (the "terrible twos" begin in the second year of life, remember) and we've always been conscious about discouraging, politely but firmly, any behaviors that cause physical injury. She may not understand all of the words we say, but a firm "no" is pretty well-ingrained as a signal that she's about to get plunked in her crib for 15 ...


13

I would tell her that just because we’re interested in someone and mean them well, we don’t have a right to invade their privacy, or involve ourselves in their sensitive affairs. The three exceptions I can think of would be if the other person is a close friend. (Your daughter can’t be that close to Jon or she would know about Jack.) if doing so would ...


12

It's a good idea to give her as much choice as feasible, but it sounds like you're already doing that, perhaps too much, and it seems you're mostly concerned with the exception cases where it's not okay to give her the decision. It's a good idea to make your reasons as specific as possible. If you know she will make a mess beyond her capacity to clean on ...


12

To me, the most complicated part of this is explaining a) why you don't want to forgive, or trust (or both) your uncle, and b) why you don't trust your mother's judgement on the matter enough to allow her to see your son. (Not that I'm questioning either element - you know the situation - but explaining the above to your child.) Presumably your child has ...


11

Your friend is being inconsistent. Her daughter doesn't like having her hand restrained? Does she think perhaps your son enjoys being hit? Talk about "violates bodily boundaries"! It's true that toddlers will naturally hit and bite. One of the roles of a parent is to intervene and to teach other ways of expressing feelings. Without that help, a toddler can ...


11

We have put a curtain wire from IKEA on the wall and use it to have a constantly changing exhibition of the latest works. The pictures that we take down are labeled with name and date/age and some of them go into our filing cabinet under "Drawings by [name]". Some of them we will throw away. Typically in any given period there are lots of very similar ...


11

My nine year old boy constantly had soap in his hair after showering, despite being in there long enough to rinse Chewbacca (of Star Wars fame) thoroughly. We installed a hand held shower head (so he could get it right up close to his head,) and it solved the problem. This might work for you too, since your daughter will be able have enough control to rinse ...


10

Three ideas (one you might not like, but if it works...): Make sure he goes to the bathroom just before bed. Did wonders for our daughter. Try some higher-absorbency pullups. Since he's almost 6, maybe move to GoodNights or something similar for older kids with bladder control issues. You might just be overloading the capacity of the diaper. If you can ...


10

I would provide much less information to your children than you have listed here. It would go something like this. Uncle Joe has a problem in his head and he hurts people on purpose. Not just people, but children like you. I won't allow him near you in case he decides to hurt you. (Optionally: it's a very small chance, but even a small chance is too ...


9

You recognize already that this is a developmental issue. It takes time, work, and maturity to develop. In addition, I think what you are describing is more than an appreciation issue. It can also be about control. A five-year-old has very little control in her life - she doesn't get to choose how the money is spent, what time she goes to bed, what she ...


8

I don't think she is stereotyping so much as learning to classify, which is appropriate for her age. As children engage with the world, they are constantly looking for how they fit in. They look for the differences in others in order to sort out who they are in contrast. We continue to do this throughout our lives, with increasing levels of sophistication. ...


8

You have a wonderful set of conflicting goals here that I'm sure many parents have grappled with - I know I have. I think your question really has three parts to it (so my answer is quite long - sorry, but I really hope it helps), the most obvious question is, should I make him apologize? but there are two other key ingredients here too: Will my coldness ...


8

Let me begin by reassuring you that you are far from alone. Many kids are far better behaved for their teachers, day care workers, other family members etc. etc. They test the ones that are with them most, love them the dearest etc (they know your buttons better than anyone's after all). At five and a half, your daughter is also experiencing a big year ...


8

The next time he does that, remove him from the situation (eg leave the classroom and go into the hall; leave the hall and go outside; whatever.) As a parent, nobody will challenge you doing this; just say "Excuse us for a moment," and to the child say "Come out here with me for a moment." When you get out of earshot of everyone, stay calm and say: That ...


7

Things you can do right now: get the dogs away from him. Don't tell him you're doing so, don't tell him it's because of how he treated them, but no more access to the dogs stop hitting him. Start to learn how to get through in other ways (it will take a while to learn this and it's hard.) tell the school you want an IEP - Individualized Education Plan - ...


7

My view is that it is my responsibility to protect and to teach my child. I have been in the situation you've described, faced with the results of the rather permissive parenting style of your friend. I stopped the younger child hitting my son, saying out loud that hitting is wrong and saying to my child that to respond with violence is also wrong. ...


7

I agree with Beofett. This particular parenting style seems to be the latest fad among some groups of parents--one of my sisters-in-law happens to be one of those parents. She makes excuses for her sons' behaviors explaining them as "developmentally appropriate" and making little to no attempt to discipline her kids even when their behavior is obviously ...


7

I live in Texas - much empathy! When we moved here our children were in middle school, and one of the first things my children's new friends asked was "What religion are you?" They had never encountered this before, but here in Texas many families, including children, identify heavily with a particular religion, most often a Christian religion. There were ...


7

It seems your daughter has developed a strong will. And while I understand that not listening to the parents is be a problem, the situation you are describing does not seem to be very worrying. Perhaps an example of her behavior where she puts herself in danger or which can have bad side effects would help understand your problem better. Having a ...


7

Your rules are not too difficult for a 7-year-old to remember and follow on her own. When I was that age, I was allowed to go visit my friend who lived down the road, but my mom's rules were explicit. You have permission to go to X person's house. You are NOT to be anywhere else and you are to be home by X time. If I find out otherwise, you are in ...


7

The issues with left-handed writing can be organised in 3 categories: Posture Physics (pulling versus pushing) Miscellaneous Posture handedness.org/action/leftwrite.html explains the posture quite well. As a left-hander, I was never taught this and as a result I kept changing my posture for most of my life (with the obvious negative effect on the ...


7

There are any number of conditions that might describe your granddaughter's behaviour but none that would be helped by the school's actions. It is seems quite common for children to have low level issues that remain hidden until they reach school. These can be managed if diagnosed correctly, even if the diagnosis is simply that the child is a bit young and ...


7

What a horrible dilemma! As I see it, your problem comprises three distinct elements: Your mother has little or no sense of what reasonable boundaries consist of. She also lies when it suits her purposes, and for some reason has prioritized her relationship with her son over the safety of her grandchildren Your uncle has even less sense of boundaries than ...


7

keeping your children physically active will greatly help their ability to sit still and concentrate. This has been shown scientifically in study after study. "Regular exercise releases brain chemicals key for memory, concentration, and mental sharpness [...] exercise also stimulates brain regions that are involved in memory function to release a chemical ...


7

First of all, keep in mind that many if not most children are not really developmentally ready for formal academics until age 7 or so. I don't know where you're located, but here in the U.S., recent academic standards are set mostly by politicians, and don't always line up very well with early childhood research. It used to be that schools didn't even ...


6

My daughter had problems with shutting down and crying especially if she got something wrong or failed at something. When she was 8, I enrolled her in a local kung fu afterschool program (combo child care/martial arts class). The master taught them pride in themselves via real achievement and didn't take any crap (where to be fair, this behavior falls in ...


6

I know this sounds strange... but instead of trying to figure out what to say, I would instead listen to her - what is going on inside her, in her head and in her heart - her fears and her longings. And then validate them. It's real for her. Telling her more information isn't going to stop her from being afraid. Daughter - mommy I'm terrified I'm going to ...


6

First of all, recognize that the refusal itself wasn't inappropriate, just the manner of the refusal. It's okay for people to not want to actively participate in activities that are contrary to their beliefs, whatever the source of those beliefs. religious or secular. Jesus actually faced similar criticism many times. Just look for any stories mentioning ...



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