Hot answers tagged primary-schooler
43
You absolutely need to seek professional help.
The fact that he is forcing other children to perform sexual activities indicates that this is a VERY serious problem that you need to address immediately.
Try to find a psychologist, councilor, or social worker who specializes in working with children. If they feel they aren't the right people to help you, ...
35
As an atheist, how should I explain theism to my children?
Treat all religions the same way: explain that they exist, and that you don't believe in them, but you do believe that everybody should make up his own mind on what to believe / believe in. As a non-believer, this can be hard to pull off without sounding dismissive toward the concept of religion ...
30
Encourage her! Ask her, What do you think is the reason?
I think it's a sign of excellent perception that she realizes that other people do things that she would not do, or that she would do differently. She is trying to understand her world, and she wants your help to make her able to "read others' minds" (make her understand their way of thought).
Let ...
22
As a former math tutor to children in middle and high school, and now a father, I can tell you a way to avoid the problem completely. Gain an understanding of the concept yourself, and make an equivalent problem that uses the same steps/ideas. Walk them through step by step, explaining as you go. One or two examples like that should be enough for them to ...
18
We've always taught our children that Santa is a game that people play, not something real -- it's important for us not to lie to our children. They still enjoy playing the game.
We also find that this helps when interacting with other children who very much believe in Santa -- encouraging our children not to spoil the game.
17
From my own and others' experience, I'd say around 6-9 years of age is the time when they figure it out. Most will probably have a sneaking suspicion for a year or two, which they spend probing and observing. Isn't it odd that Dad always misses Santa because he's chatting with the neighbors just then, every year?
When he does figure it out, try to praise ...
15
4-H (homepage, Wikipedia) worked for me and my siblings. I won awards in local, district, and state competitions in public speaking, showing cattle, and cooking while holding various offices in the organization, attend camps and participating in special events and activities. The choices of activities are much less "farm centered" and varied in recent years. ...
14
It is important to recognize that even though we, as adults, know that there are no such things as ghosts, to the child they are real. And no amount of logic will convince them otherwise. You have to accept, for a while, that what they think is real, is actually real, and then you can deal with making it not scary.
So rather than trying to reverse their ...
14
There is nothing wrong with his mind. The first time I fell in love was before my 4th birthday. I fell in love all the time in the following years, both with girls I hadn't previously known and with girls I had known for some time.
There is nothing wrong with him telling you about this experience, either. On the contrary.
The only thing that slightly ...
13
Definitely don't let it slide, but also don't overreact. We used a consistent timeout policy (warning, ultimatum, timeout) with our teenager when he was younger, and despite the fact that he cusses like there is no tomorrow with his friends now, he will almost never cuss in front of us. With our four younger kids, all under 6yo, we also use a consistent ...
13
The biggest problem with the whole system is that it's categorized as two opposing sides, when, in reality, most people agree with some points on both sides.
I would simply explain specific issues in as neutral a way as possible: "Some people believe X for these reasons, and other people believe Y for these other reasons." If you try to cover the ...
13
It sounds like you are trying to provide an objective definition to a subjective characterization.
In point of fact, your definition as-is seems rather bias-heavy, simply because the meaning of "left" and "right" are so subjective.
For example, you characterize "right" as believing that the government should stay out of people's lives as much as possible, ...
12
Consider your premise for a moment; you are claiming that it is desirable for your children to seek social approval from people who engage in activity you consider mindless and bad. I would change your focus slightly. Teach children that it's okay to be left out of things and that they don't need another's approval to engage in or abstain from an activity.
...
12
Well, it came from somewhere. Someone, at some point, showed him those things in the best case or did such things to him in the worst case.
Can't throw accusations around and it doesn't really matter now - the damage has been done, and must be fixed as soon as possible by professional help as Beofett suggested.
What I wanted to add is that in such age this ...
11
First, I suggest you check out the excellent book Parenting Beyond Belief.
Second, I suggest you might visit a Unitarian-Universalist congregation if there is one near you, as my family has done recently. UUs believe that each person is responsible for exploring and discovering their own beliefs in a responsible way. Historically it was a Christian ...
11
There are many reasons for prioritizing social development over academics. Just letting kids be kids-- learning social skills in an environment where they feel accepted-- is a critical part of development.
If your child is happy at their current school, and their friends are nice kids - easy going, well mannered, the type of personalities that you don't ...
10
Disclaimer: I have a daughter, so I usually refer to "the child" as a she. I don't mean to offend anyone, I just think typing "he or she" everywhere is silly.
Teaching Politics to a Ten-Year Old:
Define Politics
I would say the first thing is to explain what "politics" is. You have a set of issues, and a set of people who have an opinion on those issues. ...
10
What I have done in the past with similar things is enroll the kids in developing the program. Tell them you want to reward them for good behavior. Let them know you think they are great kids and want to reward them for what they are already doing (again focus on the positive).
Kids want to be good, but it is hard for them to work with their developing ...
10
I found this entry at Michigan's Health System with lots of valuable information and links to more information: http://www.med.umich.edu/yourchild/topics/puberty.htm
Having read this article on Precocious Puberty if it were my son I would take him to the doctor. There is some concern that Precocious Puberty, puberty earlier than 9 years on in boys, can be ...
10
I would be more concerned about your son's potential being wasted by being bored than about how the teacher might feel if he acts up out of boredom. Fortunately, either way, the solution is the same: explore options that would allow him to be challenged or at least entertained without being disruptive. Possibilities include:
Talk to the teacher and let ...
10
Before school starts, have a sit down meeting with your child's prospective teacher. Bring an example of what he's already capable of for reading and writing, and explain your concerns both about him, and his possible impact on the class should he be bored to tears. See if you can't come to an agreement about finding ways to challenge him that won't disrupt ...
10
Oh gosh. You want your son to be motivated by rewards, rather by the intrinsic value of something? (Basically, your child has a stronger sense of dignity than he has an interest in whatever rewards you are offering. I'd be thanking my lucky stars.) Besides, What happens when he is an adult? How will he keep his room clean if no one is there to give him ...
9
According to Parenting.com, improving your son's fine motor skills can be a fun activity you do together:
Peel away -- Have him try to peel a clementine or small orange. This will give him practice grasping something small with his fingers while pulling at the same time, a skill he's going to need for writing. (Plus, he's rewarded with a sweet treat when ...
9
First of all, as monsto pointed out, your child being eight means that they have a bit more emotional maturity, and so might be able to understand better.
Rainbowkids mentions that life for adopted children is often very different from ours here on the "outside."
Life in institutions is often based on submissive/dominance models; therefore, your ...
9
Kids go through periods where sleep is hard to come by from time to time.
I would suggest taking a few steps with him.
First. Does he have a routine for bed-time still? They still need a calming ritual. My own daughter is allowed to read to herself for about twenty minutes and then she has to turn the light out to try sleeping.
Next,
Ask him what ...
8
I think that computers are incredibly powerful tools for learning, and getting them in the hands of as many children as possible is a good thing.
Certainly, supervising your children, especially when they have internet access, is a good idea. My 8yo keeps his netbook on a small work table in my office, so we have our computer time together. I do like that ...
8
For me, the answer depends on the age of the child.
Younger Children
For a child who is, say, 3 years old or under, just ignoring it is a best practice. At that point, if they don't get a reaction, they probably won't use those words again.
Another technique at that age is to morph what they've said into a different word. If they say "fuck" for example, ...
8
Letting go of things can be difficult, even for adults. Culling possessions is a necessary part of consumerism. This particular scenario sounds extreme and I agree with Bill's comment that medical advice is required.
That being said, this is how I encourage my kids to get rid of things:
foundation of generosity - What can they share? What don't they need ...
8
If you're near water, an alternative might be a sailing club?
I have great personal experiences with joining a sailing club as a child, learning and working with others, and eventually becoming a volunteer sailing instructor myself. That sailing club was in a rural area and had a very relaxed social atmosphere -- not at all the snobbish pseudo-golfer ...
7
By far the most effective way to teach self-control and the accepting of delayed gratification is to model it.
Model Restraint. Not getting the candy they want, but getting the Starbucks you want doesn't teach them anything. Noting that you want your latte or the nice shirt but are choosing not to get it teaches a lot.
Model Discipline. Eat well, exercise ...
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