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49

Our first couple months were... bad. From that experience I can give you these pieces of advice: Realize that you are most likely not in this alone. Friends and family are a wonderful thing. Especially those that have kids, they'll know and understand. If one of them calls to say they want to come over and see the baby, and asks if you need anything... ...


19

Breastfeeding is hard For all the talk about how "natural" breastfeeding is, nothing quite prepares you for the feeling of being a complete and total failure as a mother quite like having trouble with breastfeeding. It's not easy, you don't "naturally" know exactly how to hold the baby, and he doesn't "naturally" know how to latch on. If your baby latches ...


13

You're not doing it wrong, it is that bad! No matter how much you are warned, nothing can prepare you for the tiredness, on top of the tiredness, on top of even more tiredness, plus the stress of new responsibility and holding down a job. All the parents I've met after the birth of their first share a certain look when talking about this 'special' time. ...


11

Don't be afraid to choose to not breastfeed. I had twins and tried to breastfeed them. It lasted 2 weeks and I gave up and started pumping instead. I got my sanity back and was still able to feed my boys breast milk. I was making enough that they got exclusively breastmilk for 9 of their first 12 months. I felt lucky that I was able to do that. But if ...


10

It's perfectly natural to be somewhat panicked, or worried about losing your sanity. Here is what I learned from the first few months of being a father. Accept that you're in a new situation right now. Becoming parents is the single biggest change in your life, ever. Many of your habits (chores, interests, hobbies) will have to be adapted, and while you ...


8

I spent the majority of my time in NICU, when I could not hold my son, holding his little hand in the incubator. (Probably helped me more than him, but who knows?) Soon as the docs will allow it, ask for some kangaroo time. Physical contact is a great bonding facilitator. Sing to them. My son, now 30 months old and out of NICU for QUITE a while, still ...


6

My son was born 3 weeks early, just on the line for being considered a premature birth. According to some measures, he was "behind" developmentally early on. I'd say that you should evaluate what you read based on your direct experience with your child. Most books provide ranges for development in any case. If your question could be restated as "Should I ...


5

Be Patient Be patient with yourselves, with each other, and with your baby. After the birth of our second child, it took some time for me to decompress her birth not going how I had planned, feeling like a failure because I couldn't take care of both children on my own, feeling overwhelmed, etc. On top of all of those normal feelings, I dealt with ...


5

First of all, you have my congratulations for your new arrival and condolences for the grief of uncertainty you're experiencing. A lot of your questions you should be asking your doctor. This isn't easy to do when he first gives you the news because you are still processing the shock of it. Make an appointment to discuss it with him. Bring paper to take ...


4

It's going to depend a bit on how medically complex your kiddo is. My twins (born at 26-and-6, 1,000 grams / 2 pounds 3 ounces) came home on feeding tubes but otherwise were pretty straightforwards medically. I wouldn't worry about toys etc., ours slept about 20 hours a day and wanted to snuggle the other four for the first month or two. They're not ...


4

Dry Washcloths And I remember that the nurses refer to them as washcloths--I didn't think that's what they were actually called, so I never bothered to search on that word. But my wife did and found them on Amazon (Quickables Dry Washcloths).


3

If you can, use some holiday time and take wednesdays off work. I did this in the first few weeks after paternity leave finished. The effect is that you get a little 'mini weekend' to break up the week, so that its only 2 days without help around the house for your other half, rather than 5 days.


3

One thing to remember is that some babies cry more than others, and the amount of crying doesn't necessarily reflect on how well/poorly you are doing as a parent. At least for their first few months, no amount of picking up and calming the child is going to spoil them, so I would definitely recommend doing so when you can (as opposed to the "let them cry it ...


3

I'm not aware of any studies either way, but it seems unlikely. Most four year olds are lively and impatient. My twins were born 13 weeks premature and one is firey, the other is as mellow as can be.


3

The first thing, as a matter of urgency, would be to rule out any medical conditions that may be developing for your son. Fussiness could be a sign that he is developing an infection or other condition that may be causing discomfort or pain. Have there been any other recent changes? Is your son feeding as normal? Is he pooing/peeing as normal? Has he had ...


2

WARNING! This response may contain discussion of breastmilk that some may find 'icky'. Yet most people are usually ok with drinking milk intended for baby cows... Getting milk Probably the most pressing thing is the supply issue - how do you obtain breastmilk for a premature baby. The odds are good that you aren't producing any useful milk yourself. ...


2

Be sure to have added baby to insurance Sometimes the baby gets discharged but requires a monitor to bring home (that I assume you return later). The staff will teach you how to read it. When you get a better sense of the date you might get discharged, schedule pediatrician appointments. Maybe just schedule some a few weeks in advance just so you are in the ...


2

When our twins came home at 5 pounds, we didn't have to make any changes due to the fact that they were small/premature. If I recall correctly, the only difficulty was finding size "P" preemie diapers. We'd sometimes have to visit 3 stores as they only stocked a small quantity in that not-frequently used size. Having twins, we were going through 20 a day. ...


2

Keep a muslin by every seat - you will get through several in a day and baby wipes will become your best friend, accept any and all offers of vests and babygro's as they will likely be changed almost hourly - ensure you have a washing machine and tumble dryer/ space for drying as it will be running almost daily. Don't beat yourself up for feeling resentful ...


2

I'm not sure Muslins are what the OP is looking for. I don't consider those disposable -- at least not the ones I've seen. I found this in our bathroom a while back, and was surprised to find that they are what appear to be dry wipes: They are unscented and hypo-allergenic. The box I have has Aloe, but I have to imagine you can get them without, if ...


2

Muslins. And yes, they are commercially available, couple of examples at that link address.


1

This is a special case, so it is best to consult your doctor about it. I agree with the earlier comment, that only your doctor can give you sound and professional advice regarding this matter, since he knows your baby's condition. It is also best to read stuff on how you can help your baby to gain weight and so on, so you can fully support their growing up ...



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