Hot answers tagged

99

Kids that age learn a lot by imaginative play. It's how they make sense of the world and experiment with different responses to events. Pretending to be an adult is very common. Playing along is a good opportunity to show empathy and teach better responses. You might say, I'm Eric. I'm sad because I couldn't find my toy. I wonder if I should cry or ask ...


99

In my experience, he often doesn't know himself what he means. I've heard a lot of four-year-olds ask "Why?" ad infinitum -- sometimes it's just a way of saying, "Tell me more." I would suspect that for most four-year-olds, asking "Why?" is a way of trying to learn more about the things around them, but I think that they are often looking for a simple ...


62

I think your instincts of jealousy are spot-on. My daughter did this starting when her little brother arrived home from the hospital, and every time she felt like he was getting more of Mama's attention, out came the verbal knives. Our fix was to schedule special one-on-one time with her when we could. And when things were just too crazy to carve very ...


44

Rest assured that science and religion are not neccessarily a contradiction. Some of the best scientists of past and present time were deeply religious - and came from different religious backgrounds. As one commenter wrote, Georges LemaƮtre being one relatively modern example. The question of how to connect religious beliefs and teachings and scientific ...


31

Step 1: See a dentist, have cavities treated asap. Yes, these teeth will fall out, but until then, they act as placeholders for the permanent teeth. There are also sources that claim the deciduous teeth are important for the development of the permanent teeth. (Which will start to appear at around five to seven, that's quite different between kids.) And ...


28

Often the solution here is as simple as reframing the request. So if he is playing with blocks and it's time to leave for school, no matter how much advance notice you give and no matter that you leave for school at the same time every day, when you announce "time to leave for school!" he may well resist and refuse and generally push back. So try asking ...


26

It tells just how much he sees you as role model. Instead of seeing this as abnormal you should be the role model he deserves. Other than that do understand that this behaviour will stop after some time. You only need to worry if this does not stop and causes complications. Hope I helped. P.S.: When I was a child I used to wear my father's army uniform. ...


20

My experience is that, yes, first of all, a small child's "Why?" is usually "Please keep talking." However, I have also found that sometimes they do have particular questions, and that they learn to ask clearer questions if you help them realize that there are many possible questions. While it probably won't work the first time, try offering them options ...


19

I personally don't think that science is inimical to faith and faith-based values. It can be a magnificent way to explore the intricacies of creation. You're probably versed in Ancient Near Eastern culture. There is nothing deceitful about a God who communicates with His people in a way they can understand, and in the ANE, that was through stories. ...


19

There are a couple of things going on here, and both will probably be due to attention. You said that mum finds it difficult. That means that she probably reacts slightly. This means that your daughter knows that she can say something that: Gets noticed. Gets a reaction. Brings attention. All attention, positive or negative is attention to a child. If ...


15

A 3-year old should be able understand that you are sick and that something hurts - unless you have an exceptionally healthy child he should have experienced this himself. You need to explain what hurts and what you need to do or can't do. Repeat the explanation as often as needed: You can't do X because your back hurts a lot. This is actually a good ...


14

At the age you're talking about, teacher:student ratio seems more important than student count. If the larger class you're looking at has a poorer ratio, I wouldn't choose that (absent other reasons for choosing). Teacher to student ratio of 1:8 is a reasonable ratio at 3; at 2.5 I'd say it's even a little low. 2.5 year olds want - need - attention from ...


13

I don't know if it's the case for you, but one thing I see a lot of parents of strong-willed children do repeatedly is ask a question, then get frustrated when the child answers in the negative. If a negative answer is not acceptable, then don't ask a question! Reserve questions for when you are honestly okay with any response. Bad: Do you want to go ...


13

In addition to the previous answers, which are good, it's also important to understand that small children live in a different world than adults (one full of mysteries) and that many words have different meaning to them. When you think of your daughter's love for her mother you probably think of the kind of relation that would leave a huge sore wound if her ...


13

TL; DR: We've been through the same thing, and we tried to explain to my daughter what was going to happen ahead of time, without hiding anything. Overall, it was a painless process, and after a month in the new flat, she seems to have adapted to her new environment. We went through exactly the same situation a few months ago with my 2.5 year old daughter. ...


12

Ask yourself: How do children experience their world? Most languages have words like "grasp", that mean to understand something and to touch it. Good schools/educators try to incorporate as many sensory channels and as many different ways to teach as possible. In my child's primary school letters and numbers are taught by having the children walk the ...


12

I'm not a parent myself, but two points: 1) You could argue that no, it's not just 'cute'. Imagining yourself in someone else's position is the very basis of empathy and all that is worthwhile in humanity :-) 2) Describing himself in the third person, from the POV of you or someone else, can sometimes be a mechanism to put distance between himself and ...


12

There are a few things we consider when kids are pushing to do certain activities. My daughter has taken ballet for years, and will be starting pre-pointe lessons soon. This sounds less frightening than motocross, but there are risks of both short-term injury and long-term foot structure damage if she doesn't practice, wear properly fitted shoes, and listen ...


12

We have a 3.5 year old with a similar problem. We took him to a dentist who gave us a $2000+ recommendation, 4 root canals. We went to get a second opinion. The second dentist suggested we do the following: No sugar. This means no juice, no chocolate milk, no candy, etc. Brush after each meal, make certain the decaying teeth get brushed. This can be hard ...


11

The sample behaviors you describe seem to concern different issues, not all of which I would perceive as materialistic behavior. I would suggest that you explore your feelings of discomfort to find out what is going on with you, what your values are and how you respond to the possibility that your daughter may not share them. It can be hard, I know. In the ...


11

Science is a tool. Whether it is good or bad depends on who wields it. For all the controversy, things that allegedly conflict between science and religion rarely come up in practice. Personally, I find an evolutionary process to be a rather logical way to effect a creation for someone with infinite time and insight. Even if I didn't, I had to spend all ...


10

I suffer from some chronic pain issues, which occasionally make it impossible or very uncomfortable for me to get down and play with my son, who is just over 2 years old. My wife has also had some issues, recently. She sprained her foot during her last trimester, and just delivered our second son and has quite a few tender spots. The solution we use with ...


10

--- Disclaimer: Some might feel this answer to be hard to digest. --- Have you ever thought about what is happening in your kid's brains while they are watching TV? I mean, from a neuroscientistic perspective? Basically a fireworks of impressions without any chance to influence what is happening. A child in front of TV will absorb a flood of pictures, ...


9

But, he's been asked to be the ring bearer in my cousin's wedding. If we accept, the event is going to require a suit. No, it shouldn't be if you accept, it should be if he accepts. If you haven't, then do tell him about the occasion and then do tell him in detail what exactly is he going to do there. Tell him that he can't back out if he says yes ...


8

Have you had her evaluated to see if she has any sensory issues? Sensory disorder can cause issues with clothing, as the clothes can feel extremely uncomfortable. If you think this might be the issue, try seeing if the few clothing items she can tolerate have anything in common, and build on that. Some general guidelines that commonly help are: Super ...


8

Bothersome But Normal OK, the good news first - this is totally normal. I've seen this in my kids and I've seen this in other people's kids. Lots. If this is the only indication of possible ADD/ADHD then I don't think you have anything to worry about (particularly as the doctor says they're ok). You're In Control So the first thing is to realise that you ...


8

Firstly, you have done a fantastic thing caring for your granddaughter. I would say use age appropriate responses as near to the truth without making it too much and only when she asks, making sure your granddaughter does not feel blame or responsibility for her mother. At 4, maybe a response could be, "your other mommy is not feeling very well and has to ...


8

It could be that the open-ended question of "what do you want to eat" is too difficult for him, and listing everything in the cupboard is overwhelming. See if he could more easily answer a choice type of question like "do you want peas or broccoli? and with that do you want rice or pasta? And if he still doesn't answer, provide him with a variety (4 or 5) ...


8

Based on the additional information provided in the comments and to paraphrase the question: You are concerned that an unknown male parent in a public park and with their own child of a similar age might abduct/harm your child from right under your nose while you are watching them play a game that has no inappropriate content whatsoever. All this while ...


8

I personally would choose the smaller over the larger group for small children. Social interaction always occurs between a few children at a time. Admittedly, the choice of "friends" is somewhat reduced in smaller classes, but there are significant benefits: More attention from the teacher. Even the best teacher can only spend on average [time per school ...



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