Hot answers tagged middle-schooler
22
As a former math tutor to children in middle and high school, and now a father, I can tell you a way to avoid the problem completely. Gain an understanding of the concept yourself, and make an equivalent problem that uses the same steps/ideas. Walk them through step by step, explaining as you go. One or two examples like that should be enough for them to ...
18
We've always taught our children that Santa is a game that people play, not something real -- it's important for us not to lie to our children. They still enjoy playing the game.
We also find that this helps when interacting with other children who very much believe in Santa -- encouraging our children not to spoil the game.
17
From my own and others' experience, I'd say around 6-9 years of age is the time when they figure it out. Most will probably have a sneaking suspicion for a year or two, which they spend probing and observing. Isn't it odd that Dad always misses Santa because he's chatting with the neighbors just then, every year?
When he does figure it out, try to praise ...
15
4-H (homepage, Wikipedia) worked for me and my siblings. I won awards in local, district, and state competitions in public speaking, showing cattle, and cooking while holding various offices in the organization, attend camps and participating in special events and activities. The choices of activities are much less "farm centered" and varied in recent years. ...
9
I think it's normal for a child this age to be embarrassed by his parents in general.
In this case, I think it depends on how his classmates arrive at school. Are they all walking to school? Are others dropped by their parents? Do you do anything at drop-off that may embarrass him like a kiss/hug/shout across the school yard?
You can do a few things:
...
8
If you're near water, an alternative might be a sailing club?
I have great personal experiences with joining a sailing club as a child, learning and working with others, and eventually becoming a volunteer sailing instructor myself. That sailing club was in a rural area and had a very relaxed social atmosphere -- not at all the snobbish pseudo-golfer ...
8
Don't make this about your feelings. You're an adult, you can handle it, and I'm sure there are bigger emotional minefields than the school run. Focus on your son:
Safety: Letting the child walk two blocks alone can be perfectly safe, or totally irresponsibe, or even illegal (ask your school if in doubt). It depends on the neighborhood (evil people) and ...
7
There's a pretty clear line between "doing the work" and "helping someone understand how to do the work".
One technique is to ask the child to explain to you how a problem would be tackled; or if the child is baffled to ask the child if the problem can be split into smaller bits, and how one of those smaller bits would be tackled. That makes them do some ...
7
If it were one of my children, I would absolutely seek the advice of a medical professional. All the school specialists have been able to tell you is that her short term memory is not functioning properly, but they have not told you why and they won't be able to. A neurologist should be able to help you understand better what is going on with your ...
7
I would start out by handling primary-schooler tantrums the same way as toddler tantrums -- basically, don't let his tantrums succeed.
Immediate and natural consequence. Deny him whatever it was he threw the tantrum over, end your current activity, abort your planned activity, or whatever else is appropriate.
Don't give in, ever. A tantrum never wins. He ...
5
What about Campfire? http://www.campfireusa.org/index.aspx It isn't secular, but there is no religious agenda. It is co-ed and offers outdoor programs.
Another option would be your local YMCA. I think they sometimes have programs for kids.
5
Answer -watch your kid. Every kid might need something different. You know your kids. Strangers don't.
On this don't lie to your kids thing ---Seriously? There is an age range where magical thinking is good for kids.
Santa? I figured out it didn't make sense when I was 4, though I didn't tell anyone and staged an elaborate catch the parents trap to ...
4
Don't lie to your child. Santa is a poor reason to ruin trust between you and your child. If your child is coming to you asking about santa being real, it's because they trust you and they want to know what the truth is.
You stand to gain NOTHING from lying to your son. Sit him down today and break the news to him, he'll trust you more when you're done.
4
You could also try a local Boys/Girls Club, they often have activities like that as well. Though its been awhile since I have been to one. http://www.bgca.org/Pages/index.aspx
Not for primary age kids, but when they get older you may want to keep Outward Bound in mind: http://www.outwardbound.org
Often I like to have ideas for things to do in the future ...
4
I'd like to offer an alternative, which is the B-PSA (Baden-Powell Service Association) (http://bpsa-us.org). I'm commissioner for the association, and we are open to everyone, without exception, youth and adult, boys and girls. Our policy of inclusion provides an environment for both secular (myself included) and non-secular participation. We are a ...
4
Are you sure that memory and not attention span is the problem here? I'd try some of the classic games, like "Memory" (tile matching) with some extra incentives to find out.
For instance, with every match she gets, daddy does something extremely silly. Make the reward as creative and fun as you can. The game itself is not likely to engross her, but -you ...
4
You could try connecting with him. Often, parenting isn't about seeking obedience, it is about building connection. Children will follow leaders they trust and respect, and feel trusted and respected by. Just like the rest of us.
And, yes, you are right, not all children are the same. He is an individual with his own triggers, sensitivities, etc, as well as ...
3
My brother is 10 years old, and he is in that (i don't think he's real, but i still want to get presents, so i say he is) stage. I myself found out when i was 11, My 2nd brother found out when he was 9, and the youngest is getting there. And for those who say "don't lie to your kids about santa, that makes them not trust you" please, keep that stuff to ...
3
You know you're doing the problem FOR them when they continue to ask you to 'do the next step(s) for me' - and you do them, repeatedly - the same 'type' of problem. It becomes obvious that they haven't learned the concept behind the homework.
I worked with my daughter to help her understand how to start working on a problem, most notably word problems for ...
3
The way I have looked at it is if I am writing anything down I am doing it, I will coach my son into trying to work out the answer giving him more hints if he is not getting it. Sometimes it will take a bit with certain subjects, but usually we work it out. Writing is harder, and we do Chinese characters for his Chinese School, so for that if I must write ...
3
As for ages, I don't know. I figured out that Santa was my sister when I was four, I'm told. I don't think my younger siblings ever believed in Santa. So I have no experience in when kids in general figure it out.
As for transition, my answer to "Is Santa real?" will be: "Well, what do you think?" Teach the kids to think for themselves.
Then again, I ...
3
The first thing I thought of while reading your question was that this might be an attention issue and not a memory issue. So I agree with @Tim regarding making sure this is the case. My son has attention problems and you would think he has absolutely zero short term memory sometimes. Really, he's just not listening (even though he might repeat what you ...
3
Before you go and seek the neurologist I'd ask several questions:
What kind of specialist did they show her to and what did that specialist do?
Does your daughter learn better by sight or by ear?
Does your daughter have problems retaining information that is not reading or math such as current events?
The problem may not be the short term memory but the ...
3
I've worked at a school for kids with learning differences (mostly ADHD), and here are some suggestions that we've used:
1) Try to have the child seated as close to the teacher as possible. It makes paying attention come more naturally, and makes is easier for the teacher to refocus the child without singling them out. A simple tap on the desk or eye ...
3
I think when it comes to kids with ADD/ADHD, it's important to teach them coping mechanisms. I've known kids who memorized baseball stats because they were REALLY into baseball and this was able to help them focus. I've taught students who would doodle/draw to help keep them focused, but they were still listening and paying attention. Generally, a good ...
3
The solution is to develop a curriculum that's less about sitting still and reading quietly and more about hands-on discovery and invention.
In the US, that can be tricky, depending on where you live. In major cities, you may have luck finding schools that cater more to that type of learning style.
While not specifically about ADD, this article in SLATE ...
2
When do Kids Stop Believing?
There is no right answer to this question. Kids will believe based on their experience, the evidence they've witnessed, and other factors like the testimony of their friends at school. Certainly there are different Christmas traditions (some outlined below) that will play into how long a child continues to believe.
I wouldn't ...
2
This may be a hit-or-miss suggestion, as it really depends on what your 10 year old likes. But, since you say he likes the outdoors, and you want an adventure....
Australia is known world-wide as the producer of some of the best opals. Some of the mines offer tours, and you can look for your own opals. There is even underground camping available at some ...
2
As a child I loved climbing and scrambling. There are these safe climbing activities, which are near me in the UK:
http://www.cotswoldcountrypark.co.uk/head4heights.shtml
You climb poles, and can jump off.
http://goape.co.uk/
This is a bigger activity set in woodland, with treetop walks and so on.
Perhaps there are some things similar near you?
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