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9

I have three kids. The way we handle this is that if it is in your room, it's off limits and the others have to ask before they can come in your room and play with it. If it is in a common area, then it is fair game and it's strictly first come first server. We also have a "new toy" rule. The first two days you have a toy, you get first priority of ...


8

Just speaking from our experiences: One step we took when our 2nd daughter was born, was to buy a present from her for her sister. I know it will be a huge time commitment raising twins, but try to make sure that your 2yo gets her one on one time. Additionally if you can get her to help in looking after the twins, simple things like getting toys for them, ...


8

Well, since you know she's having a sister, I'm guessing your wife is pretty far along in her pregnancy. Obviously, the sooner you get started, the better. Discussing with your daughter that mommy is going to have a new baby and sort of figuring out what your daughter understands about babies. Some kids sort of have this idea when Daddy and Mommy say ...


7

Alone time is tough, perhaps sharing specific time for each one with another parent so both get a chance to do a task/craft with each child. My wife and I take time with the older one, I will watch the younger and she and he will do something they like to do together. I sometimes will take the older out for baseball or do some work outside and my wife will ...


6

This is a perfect chance to teach them about variation. It's important to understand that your test scores will vary based on how you're feeling on that particular day; a 93 is only about 4% lower than a 97 and it's unlikely the test is really that sensitive. There may even be the possibility of retesting if the lower-scoring twin doesn't think they did ...


6

This is a good question. We have a 5yo, 3yo, and 20 month old twins who often have toy ownership confrontations. Dealing with ownership issues is a constant task for us. Generally, in our house it is a free-for-all, meaning that anybody can play with any toy, even if it was a gift given to one child specifically. Our reason for this choice is that with four ...


5

Developmentally they're at the age where sharing is an alien thing, so what you're seeing isn't necessarily a bellweather for problems down the road. That being said, the best luck we've had teaching our 21-month-old to share is modelling the desired behavior. When he picks up something that's interesting to him but that we'd rather he didn't play with ...


5

Depending on the ages you can do different things. When my first daughter was born, her older bros were 9 and 11. That's far enough apart that I didn't have to do to much. I just told them they were getting a sister and we'd need their help with... stuff. Kids that age pretty much have a cemented personality and know their role in the parents life and here ...


5

I actually involved my Daughter in with helping me and my son when he was born. She was always wanting to the "Big Helper". It worked for quite a while until he started to walk and she could not get away from him. After that is was teaching them to play well together.


4

I have twins who are 2.5 years old. At 18 months consider having the kids take turns with a toy and not play with it at the same time (another form of sharing). First it's Sam's turn and then it's Alex's. You can use a timer so after 2 minutes they have to switch toys. Be very encouraging, thanking them for sharing and playing nicely together. At this ...


4

We have almost exactly two years between our two daughters and we did a bit before the birth (we bought books with stories about new babies) and made sure that she 'knew' (as much as she could) that there was a baby in Mummy's tummy. Then around the birth we bought her a gift from the baby - and a gift from her to the baby. So for a while after the birth ...


4

It depends on the social maturity of the child, as well as with the game. If the child is very social and will likely be playing the game with a lot of -different- people, then I would say yes. If child is able to express themselves in a very unique and personal way, then again yes. But if the child is going to be playing the game with the same couple ...


3

Spend one-on-one time with your daughter, as much as you can. Important now, while the sibling is still on his/her way, but critical once he/she gets here. Also, find ways to include her in the day-to-day care of her new sibling. Can she fetch wipes/diapers/bibs? Would she want to help feed, when bottles are appropriate? Maybe she can do some ...


2

I think it's important that you make time for the older child so they don't feel neglected. Do something that just involves her. With my older daughter, I'll take her to the store with me or out for a walk. Just the two of us. While my wife takes my other daughter (2 month old) or vise-versa. It has really helped with the jealousy for us.


2

We just had our second baby in February and we also have a two year old. It's only been a few months, but he seems to be coping well with having the baby around. The thing that is really helping us now is we try to keep his daily routine as regular as possible. For example, story times with me in the mornings, lunch together in the afternoons, dinner as ...


2

Crafts can often be done on two levels: one kid working on a different project than the other kid. That way, both children can have a reasonably challenging project. This can also help when the older kid wants to play with an 'older' toy: have one kid work on a project which challenges him, which the other would find boring; that way they will both be ...


2

My little one is only 1 year old and so doesn't do structured activities well, but when this situation arises I try to find a similar substitute for him so that his older sister can do her thing. For example, if she is painting he might be colouring with crayons.


2

Jealousy is natural tendency we find among infants and babies. You simply cannot help it and it goes with the time. Have you ever seen two grown up twins fighting over a morsel to eat first? Don't worry, this will go as they grow. As of now, if alternating spoon-feeding has not worked, for a period being, you can treat/feed them separately. You take one of ...


2

Sounds pretty normal to me, at least up to a point. 3 and 17 months here, and not that different; except the 17 month old stands up to himself a bit better. We handle it in a very straightforward manner. Any toy grabbing means immediate removal of that toy from play for the day, unless that would excessively harm the wronged party if there is a clear ...


2

In my opinion this is very common behavior. He probably wants to both be part of what B does, and maybe to retaliate. Our 3 year old does this quite common to his little brother, 13 months old. He still love his little brother, I and I bet A loves B a lot still. Does A share well with kids his own age? At 4, he is probably used to having some 'discussion' ...


1

I see no reason you can't give a game that requires multiple participants to a birthday child. Just because birthday child will have to find someone to play the game with them for it to be fun in no way takes away from the present being for them. I remember as a kid having some games that were mine (twister) and my sister had some games that were hers ...


1

I agree with Valkyrie. To add a technique, tho, you could also try sitting and playing with one or the both of them a few times. Emphasize when you're giving stuff to them. Emphasize when you don't want them taking the knives that you're playing with at that particular moment, especially when there's other knives on the floor between you just itching to be ...


1

Meg Coates knocked it out of the park. One thing I'd do is schedule some one-on-one time with her as much as you can. My 3-yr-old spent the first few weeks after her brother came home telling me "I don't love you." Translation: I'm jealous and can't really express it. Some Mommy-Daughter and Daddy-Daughter dates fixed that right up.


1

On your specific questions, what I've found works for my 3 1/2 and 1 yr old. Take the "older" activity to an unreachable place (the kitchen table the smallest one can't reach) so that the activity is "safe" and you don't frustrate the older one by having to do everything over again Have the older one teach things to the smallest one, or give her/him things ...


1

Sibling rivalry will occur, you say, but I disagree. Our second child is nearing 2 months now and his 3yo brother has been an absolute angel about it. There has not been a single incident that looked even remotely like jealousy. But we are expecting to see some of that when the little guy starts to grab toys and move around. I'm not sure if we did ...



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