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5

Regarding the second point, the idea is that it teaches the child to do things in an appropriate setting. Instead of spitting inside, we go outside into the garden and have a game there. It's about positive reinforcement of what you wanted to say anyway. If our kids start chucking stuff around, we tell them that they can go outside and do that which is fine ...


2

The answer, in short, is yes and no and it depends on the child & usage. Elaborating... This pertains not only to children, but to all people. When we make a statement about a behavior or a characteristic and attribute that to the person, then if it is done so repeatedly, whether by the same person or separate people individually, there are 2 ...


0

Eye contact during conversation is not an inherently human behavior. Different cultures use or avoid it under differing conditions. It's possible he hasn't learned that "eye contact is what we do when we're talking" yet. As a middle school teacher, I've run across hundreds of kids who won't look an adult in the eye when they're under emotional stress. I ...


0

Where are the patrols when your stepdaughter is out at midnight? If she is not allowed out after 7, how did she get out? Were you not at home? Who are her friends? Where did she get the money to buy another phone? Why was the second phone not removed? If she could be put in lockdown for not wearing the niqab, I am struggling to believe that she is either ...


0

Put the heat up in his and/or room and if that dose not work than tuck them in tight it worked for me when I was a kid.


2

She should certainly not be blamed for his behavior, but (speaking from personal experience) it is very possible that she does provoke him. They will both grow out of it eventually, but in the meantime, if your daughter indeed does or says things to your son that are not nice, put some blame on her as well (although obviously less blame than for hitting). I ...


1

Tell your child that abusing and hitting is not acceptable. If your son is jealous because of the attention that may be his sister recieves, then hug him and tell him how much he means to you.


11

The reason "for", generally, is grounded in a largely depression-era concern that you may not have enough nutrition/calories in the future. Literally, you need to eat it or you might starve. That was a concern in the 30s, and people raised then often took that to heart and kept it in the 50s and 60s when they were having kids. That said, there is an ...


4

We had significant battles with both of our children (still ongoing with our 2 year old) over eating more, and we've had to force the issue on occasion. A couple points to keep in mind: Our children are both built very slender, and they are considered under weight. We've been encouraged by their doctor to do what we can to get more calories into them ...


4

You will have disputes with your children. That's inevitable, so you should avoid creating them when unnecessary. I often ask myself "Is this a fight worth winning?" If the answer is no, I don't make it an issue. I think "cleaning your plate" is such a case.


28

It's quite easy to find information on this study. The gist of it is that if you force to your child to eat everything on their plate, they are more likely to become obese as an adult. That's messed up, so... please don't do this to your child. "New findings have shown that pushing children to eat everything on their plate has a direct link to obesity. ...


51

This is what my mother did with us (it wouldn't work with very young children; I can't recall what she did then): We were never served food. It came to the table in whatever pot it was cooked in, and placed on a block of wood (to avoid burning the table). We then served ourselves out of that pot (or those pots, pans, whatever, depending on what the food ...


49

Advantages.... None Disadvantages... It creates unnecessary conflict with the child, and it compromises the child's natural ability to self-regulate food intake based on nutrition requirements. As long as children are offered healthy food (no junk food) they will naturally eat what they need and no more. Forcing them to finish their plate can potentially ...


0

If you want to show a child that something like homework is important, then you need to show them it's important and not tell them. I would set aside time with him specifically for working on homework, and help him with it. The best learning most often happens at home. In this case, you're not only helping him learn his school material, but you're teaching ...


1

I firmly believe that when a parent brings their child to a shared play area or play group, then they confer to the rest of the attending guardians the right to interact with that child. (I also believe that each attending guardian has a shared responsibility to ensure the safety of the children and the surrounding property.) In this case, if another child ...


1

One of the most important concerns for a young child is to not have the things they are using taken away from them. Allowing another kid to take your child's toy is not sending the message you need to share it sends the message you cannot be confident that I will protect your right to keep using the toy. You need to take the toy back from the other child ...


2

The other parent seems to have taken a cue from you.* You didn't say anything and let the her deal with it, which sends the message that it doesn't bother you on behalf of your son. And when that happens repeatedly, the simpler path for her to take was just let her child have the toy -- that way, it doesn't get stolen anymore and she doesn't have to ...


6

This situation is going to recur for years. Develop a long-term strategy for dealing with it based on what is best for your son, not necessarily what is fair. At this age, he's not going to learn any significant lesson from any behavior you choose as long as it's not frightening to him. There are plenty of reasons to stop someone from snatching a toy: value ...


1

David, thanks for all the additional info. It's really helpful. Joe and sbi have already written really good answers on ways to cope with the behaviour itself, so I'll try not to duplicate too much of that. I feel for you as parents - tantrums are horrible - and even more I feel for your son, who is obviously having a hard time. Be reassured that although ...


2

Sorry to write that, but I think your wife is right. You have no right (it's impolite on your part) to demand that your daughter talk about her own flatulence (even indirectly through an excuse). There could be shame associated with that talking, especially with females. And then, your daughter could associate you with that feeling of shame. And another ...


10

She should try to leave the room or the crowd if you're trying to avoid impropriety. A toilet is unnecessary when simply away from prying olfactory senses would do. Now to the meat of the issue: Stating that it is wrong or bad for a child, teen, or adult to pass gas is the same as stating it is wrong for them to sneeze or cough in public. If society as a ...


4

I agree with the wife. Even though, Farting is very common, sadly our society does show hypocrisy in accepting it resulting in embarrasement. So the best method is to fart in toilet, but if by chance a person farts in public, unless asked why should he holler in front of everyone " Excuse Me, In case you are wondering, I just wanted to let all of you know ...


7

Miss Manners agrees with your wife: "unacceptable noises" (her term) should be "acknowledged by neither the noisemaker nor the noise recipient".


29

I think that there are some people you should be comfortable with, comfortable enough to pass gas in their general vicinity and not have to apologize. And the closest family should certainly be such people. At home, when I'm not alone, I try to do it in the toilet, though I don't feel bad or ashamed to let one go when my wife or LO is near. Seriously, ...


12

I encourage my kids to excuse themselves when they pass gas. (Obviously the best-case scenario is that they are able to release it in the bathroom instead, but things happen.) I have a few goals with this: acknowledging that there's going to be a brief bad smell in the room, accepting responsibility for it, and begging pardon for inflicting it on the other ...


0

You probably don't want to hear this, but it sounds like your expectations are too high - i.e. you probably have too many rules, so the kids can't stick to all of them, so they will fail and you have to correct them, and so they become a more and more resilient to your corrections. Give them an opportunity to succeed. Never give a child a rule that is too ...


3

If your preschooler or middle childhood kid(s) are not listening to you and you are looking for tips that doesn't include yelling louder here is are some resources: Tips Try really thinking about why the child is misbehaving Discipline in context so it's easier for kids to remember and associate Time outs or alone time help sometimes Parental Wisdom ...


1

I'd check in this order: Is there something that troubles him? Sometimes seemingly minor things can get a child very confused and helpless. Some children have surprisingly fine antennas for undercurrents. Think alonge the lines of family / parental relationship, jealousy, bullying at school, recent changes in his life... True, this is a large field, but ...


7

I saw the word "discipline" used in the context of children and I really thought I should refer you to two authors. First, please see Alice Miller. Her website is www.alice-miller.com. If it's down, you can access it using the WayBackMachine at www.archive.org. Please do read her books and/or her articles. Many of us treat children in very damaging ways, ...


8

I would suggest that you focus on separating why the child is misbehaving: Wanting to do something contraindicated Directly challenging authority/boundaries Wildness/out of control behavior The three kinds of misbehavior are very different in why the child is doing the action(s), and that drives how you discipline them. It sounds like your older child ...


6

You have an 8 yr. old and a 4 yr. old. In children these ages (esp. the younger child), removing tv for week is an ineffective way to discipline, because the discipline is not tied immediately to the action that provoked it. Response to an unacceptable behavior is most effective when it's immediate and consistent. Also, your discipline seems to have ...


0

I was exactly this way as a child. My issue was that I was bored. The work was too easy or uninteresting, and I didn't do any of it.


-2

When he whines respond 'I will talk to you when you can talk nicely and not whine'. When he cries let him know he is too old to cry because he doesn't want to do something. You do not care to listen to it so he needs to go to his room until he is finished and ready to talk like the big boy he is. then follow through! Most importantly is to stop letting ...



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