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2

Part of raising a healthy (behavior-wise) child is finding that happy medium between allowing them assert some independence, but at the same time teaching them that they must operate within a particular boundary. Just like I can't pick my start time for work, they can't pick their bedtime. But I can choose things like my route, what I wear, the color of my ...


2

You can't let children do whatever they want to do because they don't know what needs to be done...that's why they are children. That you even ask the question suggest that you think of the child as just a small adult, able to balance conflicting desires, understand long term consequences and make decisions leading to an optimal outcome. Well, they can't, ...


3

We've considered this for my three year old (and will probably think more about this for my 18 month old, as he's just lost his crib rail). We had all sorts of problems with his bedtimes, probably as bad as what you describe, even back at 18-24 months. What we realized over time was that his schedule wasn't centered on the times that we'd like. It seems ...


28

3 years old is a prime time for children to assert their independence, developmentally they understand they are separate entities from everyone else. With some kids, choices are key. Many are extremely motivated to do something as long as it is in their own way. I would recommend that you don't allow her to decide for herself, but give her meaningful ...


4

Children are generally able to handle much more freedom than modern parents give them credit for. Usually a bad result when you first try granting more freedom is due to a lack of practice, out of rebellion more than anything else. Just because a child wants control over her own body doesn't mean she won't tend to make similar choices to the ones you would ...


11

The only harm that might come of allowing your child to choose when to get ready for bed is that they might not get enough sleep, and they might develop poor sleep habits. As long as you place a reasonable limit to how late she can choose so she gets plenty of sleep at night, then there's no reason you can't let her choose. In my experience, however, ...


5

Some people hate the idea of having to follow a structured routine. I'm not sure how you present the breakdown of the evening to her, but if it's at all an ordered sequence of events, she may simply not care about it or she might want to break out of it. Either way, I'd say the root of the problem is you don't have her 'buy in'. She likely doesn't quite ...


3

I personally don't think there is any harm. There may even be benefits, especially when she is older. It starts the idea of respect and independence, generally not something you work on with a three year old, but I don't think there is nothing wrong with that. I would take on the advice of others allow leeway as long as she understands the repercussions. ...


5

Agreeing on a routine together is important. We have used sticker charts to great effect in our house when if, for example, they go to bed nicely 5 days they get a treat. Then you can focus on the "Next we will do the and let's see if we can do that well too as you might get a sticker tonight" so it's a positive thing. We have found that battling with our ...


23

Giving some freedom won't hurt. But make sure you are confortable with whatever she comes up. Preferably it shouldn't be her deciding, you should come up with an "evening plan" together. A good trick is to discuss the problem, reach a consensus, and write down what you decided together on a sheet of paper, then hang the sheet somewhere visible. She can't ...


0

As a music teacher, I give the following hints: 1: Make sure that your Ideas about what and how he/she should practice are in line with your teachers. 2: if the child is younger than 8, he/she may just not be old enough to be deeply engaged. Ease up, until about 8 years old. 3: If you push too hard (how much that is is decided by the child, sorry) the ...


2

I motivated my daughter to practice clarinet by playing with her. We got some duets and played together. Even now (20 years later) when she comes home we'll go in the cellar and do those duets again, loving every minute. I suppose this is a bit tricky with a piano, but... there are tunes for four hands, right? And maybe he could accompany you (or his mates) ...



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