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13

Having been bullied in more than one school, I can provide these observations from the "victim" perspective: bullies enjoy being mean more than being kind bullies enjoy the attention they get from others who think their behavior is cool (make ten people laugh by making one person sad) bullies encourage each other bullies are compensating for something ...


12

I hear a couple different things here, so I will approach them 1 at a time. First, your girl... News flash: ready? She's 3. 3 year olds don't know much about anything, let alone how to effectively defend themselves to a bully. So that's where parents come in. Most adults don't even know how to effectively handle a bully. She likely can't even remember ...


10

Your first question is what causes a child to become a bully, and there are many possible causes, most of which directly relate to low self-esteem: observing parents and siblings exhibiting bullying behavior being victimized by a bully receiving negative messages or physical punishment or experiencing controlling behaviors at home or school living in a ...


8

His classmates are rewarded by the spectacle of his tantrums as well as the group feeling of having a common target. Unless he can control the tantrums and ignore all taunts, I fear the only option is to change his environment to a more welcoming one. That may mean changing schools or getting ALL the parents to make sure their children behave.


7

When I was growing up there were times when I was troubled but I didn't tell my parents because I wanted to deal with it on my own, and I didn't want to worry them. I was also concerned that if I told them I would lose some of my freedom. So how do you know? You don't. One of the things you have to accept about being a parent is that you cannot control ...


6

I'm not an expert at this; I do help look after my partners three kids and I have a son of my own who lives with his mother. But from my experience, and from what I have read over the years, a child usually becomes a bully if there are problems at home: not enough attention, or the child is getting bullied at home. It is mostly a cry for help, or trying to ...


5

While many of the bullies I have seen in schools have come from homes with significant parenting problems, it would surprise you the number of kids who bully (at an older age) who come from loving homes. It can be very easy for the bully-ee to become the bully in a chain-reaction kind of way. At its root, bullying is about power and a lack of ...


5

There doesn't seem to be a huge body of research on the matter but a recent meta-analysis looked at the effect of parenting on the risk of children to become bullying victims or turn bully themselves. Parenting behavior and the risk of becoming a victim and a bully/victim: A meta-analysis study (Lereyaa et al., 2013) Citing from the abstract: Negative ...


5

At first you need to know which kind of bully your kid may suffer: Ability: Some kids get bullied because they're outstanding in some area, or just by being different from the average. Faction: Some just get involved in some unneeded dispute somehow, whether out of initiative or negatively. Personality: Another reason is an uninviting personality. So, ...


5

That's pretty common behavior at age three and a half. I would hesitate to call it "overly" sensitive at this point. At any rate, it's not disliking being touched on the shoulder that's the problem, it's the reaction, so teach the reaction you want him to have and make him repeat it. It also helps to ask if their natural reaction is having the desired ...


4

StopBullying.gov lists the following warning signs, although they caution not every child exhibits symptoms: Unexplainable injuries Lost or destroyed clothing, books, electronics, or jewelry Frequent headaches or stomach aches, feeling sick or faking illness Changes in eating habits, like suddenly skipping meals or binge eating. Kids may come home from ...


3

Very difficult subject... Tackle the Problem from the Inside It's the most effective, and the point you have the most impact on. It sounds possible zen and overreaching, but the child need inner-strength, and, above all, inner-peace. It's going to be very difficult, but someone would need to help the child to be more passive about the assaults and not ...


3

Without knowing anything else about your son - have a look in to "Sensory Integration". Some kids can be overloaded with sensory input, and have a hard time dealing with it. At the very least it could provide you with some insight in to his world. If it seems to fit together you might want to get help on it - here in Canada we have the Child Development ...


2

It's hard to give a definite solution. If you can subtly get on to the subject (maybe she'll bring it up) of this problem, perhaps advise your daughter to shout 'go away' when someone does something like that. I did advise my son to do that, and admittedly he got a little carried away with it, but I found it better than not doing anything. As for ...



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