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34

I take what I consider to be a pragmatic approach: if there is no toy which is obviously a gun, kids just make their own (60-80% of boys, 30% of girls, play with "aggressive toys" of some variety). Fingers, sticks, coat hangers (which double as pretty decent fighter planes and space ships, IMHO), pencils/pens, cardboard tubes (packing tubes make great ...


29

I would say that teaching children about a healthy diet is a great first step. But on the same note, some of the foods that are really healthy (whole grains, deep green vegetables) are gassy foods. As for gas sneaking out during practice. I (late 20s) take an adult (mom-grandma ages) yoga class and sometimes during those stretches gas sneaks out. I ...


13

Most important then if you should let your child play with toy A or toy B, is what you already posted in your question: What are the effects this kind of play have in the children's psichology? Remember toddlers and young children have trouble separating fantasy from reality. His nightmares and fantasies will seem as real as school to them. You have to ...


9

The first question is: when is it right to give advice? The second question is: what qualifications must you have to give advice when it's needed? In most circumstances, it's not wise to give any advice to people who have not asked for it. If the recipient doesn't think they need it, they aren't going to listen to it anyway. All the advice giver will do is ...


8

Honestly, to me this sounds like normal sibling behavior, extroverted or not. My family was all medium introverts (at different levels), and we did things like this pretty commonly - trying to get into the others' room when the other wanted us out. Some of it was simply a power game I think - being able to force your way into their room literally showed ...


8

Toddlers this age (and younger) bite. That's just a fact. Most of them outgrow it fairly unceremoniously. They bite for a number of reasons, three of which are 1) reaction, 2) attention, and 3) frustration. Usually this frustration stems from not being able to "use their words" to adequately express their frustration. To combat this, show him all the time ...


8

From what you've typed, you're clearly overwhelmed at the moment. Step 1: Day without Child Arrange for a day where your child is either at their grandparent's, at the father's, at a nursery/creche, anywhere safe, when you can relax, get some sleep and move on to the further steps. Until you get a bare minimum of distance for a day, it's really hard to ...


7

Well, I suppose they're entitled to give advice, but unless they have worked with children long-term, like a nanny or a teacher, or are highly credentialed, like a child psychologist, no one will pay them any attention. The reason is kids have a sort of "honeymoon period," that a babysitting experience isn't long enough to trigger. They manage to behave ...


7

So this doesn't seem too unusual to me. Many babies prefer to be held, and some more than others. A few suggestions: Have you tried swaddling? The feeling of being wrapped mimics the feeling in the womb, and my babies would not sleep without being swaddled. have you tried a swing? Some babies really like the gentle rocking motion (again, this mimics the ...


6

Pointing is really the first way kids start to express their wants other than crying, so this is exciting for them. They also sometimes just want to know what something is. I find that the most important thing you can do is to communicate that you understood her. I find it useful to communicate back with words to my 15 months old, such as : Yes, that ...


6

When your child rebuts you that his statement is true, you simply need to point out that's not all that's required. The usual guideline for adults is: Is it true? Is it necessary? Is it kind? Gossip about a classmate fails the second two tests. Tattling can be considered ok under certain circumstances (are you telling me to get someone into trouble, or ...


6

It sounds like fairly normal behavior to me, but I think you're doing the right thing. At an early age, children might not yet understand when certain things aren't okay to say (That age is anywhere between 1 and 100, incidentally). The best way to address this is on a case-by-case basis, letting them know why it's rude to say what they've said, and to ...


5

Here's my attempt: You messed up your relationship (I'm not criticizing it, BTW, I'm just stating a fact) and that obviously troubles your daughter. If you feel like you cannot fix your relationship, all you can do is to try to minimize the negative effects this has on your daughter. If I was in your place, I'd start out by asking myself why she behaves ...


5

It may not be the answer you want and it will probably get down voted but the best thing you can do is to move back in together and try a lot harder to make your marriage work.


5

Consider you answered your own question, you turned out okay, rationally recognizing the inherent dangers. There are important, legitimate, appropriate, responsible uses of weapons for defense, hunting to provide food, and sports. Its not just about violence, or playing cops & robbers. Water, essential for life, is inherently dangerous. A child can ...


5

You can't get a three-year-old's behavior and emotions under her control if you can't get your own under your control. That's the first thing you've got to work on. Start by thinking through the interactions you're having that cause you grief some time and place where you're calm. Make a plan on how you're going to react, what you'll do, how you'll react ...


4

Absolutely yes, 100%. Main reason being, everybody has been a child, and thus has a unique perspective on how to deal with children. Doesn't make them an expert by any means, but it's one of the few things I think everybody can have a valid opinion on. I know some very wise people who haven't had kids. Does it mean it's going to be 'good' advice? Or the ...


4

You are clearly an organized and intentional parent and have instilled discipline into your child (great!), yet your child is suddenly acting up. It sounds like you need to work on your marriage more than your parenting. I'm sorry if that sounded insensitive, or maybe even off-topic, but it's important to understand that a 3-year-old's entire universe is ...


4

In addition to some of the great advice offered here, I would recommend: don't change her home. Separating parents will often play ping pong with their kids - pass the kids back and forth between Mom and Dad's home. This can be very frustrating for a child because they don't have a place to call home anymore. I've seen parents who treat the home where they ...


4

I think the introvert/extrovert difference is a red herring in this case (and I say that as an introvert myself). Instead, I think the difficulties you are running into are from two issues which are unrelated to extroversion: Following Rules The responsible authorities (his parents) have made a rule: No entering siblings' rooms without permission. That ...


4

While I am not terribly extroverted myself, I have had to deal with a number of children (and some adults) like this. As far as your first question goes, I really don't know. The extroverts like this that I have dealt with seem like it is just part of being an extrovert and that it isn't tied to being a certain age. Don't take that to mean he won't grow ...


3

First, I wouldn't call this excessive just yet. Without knowing what it is that frightens him, it's hard to say if its a "normal" reaction or not. Is he scared of Phineas' spiky hair? Or that what they're doing is super dangerous and somebody could get hurt? To begin, I would strong encourage deep probing to really understand what it is that scares him, ...


2

I mostly agree with anongoodnurse's answer (+1 from me), and would add: Between 2 and 4 is the phase where children learn to deal with the frustration of not getting something they want, and where they can be very demanding, impulsive, and sometimes violent. However, that doesn't mean they are evil or mean. They just have to learn how to do that thing ...


2

You are doing all that you can, and it sounds like you have a pretty good handle on things. It sounds like you understand that it's impossible to completely prevent or 'fix' her behavior, and that's good. She is going through a tough time, just like you and your wife are, and there will invariably be some outbursts. I would advise redirecting her when she ...


2

Even at a young age, you can start explaining the why of your decision, e.g.: I'm not willing for you to have the knife, because I have a need for your safety and the knife is very sharp. Although it may feel a bit silly with someone so young, if you stick with it, you will be surprised at how quickly the little one's receptive language will develop ...


2

What you're doing is perfectly fine. Her pointing indicates a want, either to have it or to know the word for it. Choosing to indulge that want is a matter of common sense; if what she wants to have is delicate, valuable, inconvenient or appetite-spoiling, she probably shouldn't get it (though obviously you can still tell her what it is). Her reaction to ...


2

You probably need to accept that baby wants to be sleeping with you and learn to simplify the feeding process, such as by co-sleeping. This can last 2 years, but it does end, as @Ida says. To add to @Ida's answer, make sure that your partner is taking a fair share of the load to give you a chance to sleep for more than 20 minutes at a time. This may include ...


2

I am a 13 year old as well. I have not learnt to control myself properly yet, and I am still trying to find ways, but I do have a few things that I want my parents to do when I get angry: When I go in my room it means I don't want my parents to come in and bother me. In other word it means I need my space. Sometimes (mostly after I calm down), I try to go ...


2

Have you spoken to the parents about this? Parenting is difficult and I could imagine that they are having serious trouble dealing with this situation. You are not in a position to interfere as long as the parents are not breaking any laws, but you can still show interest and ask questions. If they're already embarrassed by her behavior, they'll probably ...


1

This does seem perfectly normal behaviour. Of my 3 kids, one would be perfectly happy on her own in the middle of a field. One of the others really wants company at all times, so being on her own is like a punishment for her. Your son may be feeling upset by the enforced lack of company - for him, being with his sister is a good thing. And at that age he ...



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