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34

I'm an autistic adult, the parent of an autistic adult, and a teacher of autistic children. The reason your daughter laughs when you're really angry with her is because your anger is frightening her. This might seem counter-intuitive to the neurotypical mind, until one considers that neurotypical laughter is frequently in response to someone being hurt, ...


24

A hobby is something you like. How do you force someone to like something? Additionally, at the choice of hobbies there is an extra agenda: You want him to socialize. I think you have a good point. The time he has now, as a kid, will not come back. Social skills he could be picking up now, will be harder to learn when he realises he's missing something. ...


24

From what you're writing, you don't really want him to get any hobby, but a hobby where he can socialize. If he's slightly autistic, socializing is the hardest thing for him to do. And it will be even harder if the socializing is in a context where he has nothing to talk about or isn't interested in the things people talk about. You said he likes to use ...


14

Stephen King wrote a description about this once. "You're one of those people that, when King Laugh knocks, you can't keep the door closed." I'm the same way: laughter overwhelms me at sometimes very inappropriate times, and especially when I'm emotionally overwrought or very fatigued. It's apparently fairly common with folks on the autism spectrum. And ...


14

I am not so sure this is an answer, and I am not a medical practitioner, but you are drawing conclusions based on tiny bits of information, much of which is conflicting. Sometimes your daughter displays behaviors that are possibly indicative of a behavioral condition, and sometimes she behaves in ways that are absolutely "normal." The only real issues you ...


11

I was just extremely socially awkward as a kid, not autistic, but here's what I would suggest: In Scouts (talk with the Scoutmaster and try to figure out what would be best), there are many different routes for him to take. I had my own tent that I would bring on all outings so I didn't have to share, and knot-tying was the hobby I worked on there. By ...


10

Laughter is a big emotional response. My son does this to me too. (And my body is also wired to laugh inappropriately in extremely high-tension situations, so I can relate on that level too.) Now the weird part and the part I don't understand is that she claims she cannot control the laughter. She says that she doesn't want to laugh but she can't help ...


10

His classmates are rewarded by the spectacle of his tantrums as well as the group feeling of having a common target. Unless he can control the tantrums and ignore all taunts, I fear the only option is to change his environment to a more welcoming one. That may mean changing schools or getting ALL the parents to make sure their children behave.


9

Even with neurotypical kids, it can be challenging to find a hobby or sport that they like well enough to stick with and really develop. Some kids find their niche right away, others have to try lots of different things to figure out what works for them and what doesn't. I think you have two choices: build off of the hobbies he does have or try to help him ...


8

but I was wondering how normal it is to go through several years of school before a "problem" is noticed by parents and/or teachers or other professionals. Is this possible? Autism is strange beast. It is extremely varied from person to person, and other psychological disorders (and several genetic ones) can look like Autism and not be it. ...


7

I don't know what the "official" age is where one can be diagnosed with Aspergers with certainty. I'm sorry I can't answer that question for you. Regarding the second aspect of your question: assuming our suspicion doesn't fade, at which age is it worth it given that there is not much that can be done about it? My answer to that is as soon as ...


7

I think you're saying something different than you really mean. You say "he needs a hobby" but what you mean is "he needs a different hobby". There are plenty of people without mental health issues who love nothing more than to spend their time on a computer, and plenty of people who do. It isn't a "problem" - instead, it's just another avenue that has its ...


6

Selecting schools without the issue of Autism can be difficult. With ASD or Asperger's you will need to consider the impact on your elder son and how that will impact the family. Another issue to consider is the impact on your younger son of making this decision based on your elder son's needs. Also, please reach out to local autism resources, public ...


6

As DA01 mentions in his comments, autism is a gigantic spectrum. Strategies for how to deal with it vary widely - the person who could best answer this question would likely be the child's mother. It may be an uncomfortable question, but it's likely one that the child's mother is familiar with answering by now. If you're worried about coming across as ...


6

While unemployment stress may be contributing, don't blame a rebellious phase entirely on that- your daughter is in the prime rebellion years, you would probably be facing some of these challenges anyway. My suggestion is to drop the angry face and immediately put on a sad face, and say seriously, it's not nice to laugh at people who are having problems. ...


6

Just a short answer to make an additional suggestion to the ones already given, which I'm kind of surprised hasn't come up already: board, dice, card or other tabletop games. Games of this kind often go down well with people on the Autism spectrum because they offer an activity with clearly-defined, easily understood boundaries. And it's obviously a pretty ...


5

And then when I start to look noticeably angry and start to raise my voice, she laughs at me. I have Asperger's, and this is something I have dealt with all my life. I initially noticed this when I was young: I would find myself involuntarily laughing when in situations where I was either subjected to physical pain (such as burns or blunt trauma), ...


5

I can't speak to much of your post, but I have a step-nephews (8 and 11 now) who have sensory integration issues and I want to offer what little I know that might be helpful there. It is good to make eye contact when you are speaking, but it makes your son uncomfortable. The reason you want to make eye contact is to make sure he is listening to you. You can ...


5

No. The only well known study showing a link (Wakefield) was subsequently exposed as fraudulent. This is discussed in more detail at Skeptics SE: http://skeptics.stackexchange.com/questions/607/are-there-any-other-studies-besides-the-discredited-wakefield-studies-that-have


5

Children with autism are each very different but communication tends to be difficult for most of them. Getting a child with autism is speak is usually a great challenge even for a trained speech therapist, so know that there is usually no quick fix. Observe carefully your child's communication. Encourage eye contact by holding object he desires near your ...


5

The first step to adopting is to make the decision that it's what you want to do. No one can really do that.A few things to consider about this first step. Realize that you will be taking another kid into your home. Adoption has it's own joys, and it's own pitfalls, it's different than giving birth to children. Still, it can be a very rewarding thing. ...


5

I thought I might share our experience with our son, now just gone aged 5 and mildly ASD (so more or less Aspergers as was). An astute creche worker spotted the signs when he was three and he was referred for assessment (this is in the UK). He had two visits from a health team to his nursery when he was aged three or just gone four, and from there was ...


4

I suspect your 7 year old is extremely shy, very uncomfortable around new people, has difficulty adjusting to changing situations, does not pick up social cues that seem obvious to everyone else, and is not nearly as verbally expressive as other children. Here's the thing .. whether your child has enough symptoms or severe enough symptoms to formally be ...


4

If he is only slightly autistic, then it is a good idea to try to find a hobby for him and even push him a little (not forcefully, more like guidance and example). After all everyone needs some free time to relax, not only to idle, but the brain actually demands it. With autism sometimes there is a lack of understanding for the needs of others and even ...


3

My daughter has some autistic characteristics, although she hasn't been officially diagnosed because her cerebral palsy symptoms are overwhelming. Observing anger and violence makes her laugh, the same as watching slapstick humor. My theory is that this is due to her difficulty empathizing. If you take the emotions out of the picture, someone being angry ...


3

Very difficult subject... Tackle the Problem from the Inside It's the most effective, and the point you have the most impact on. It sounds possible zen and overreaching, but the child need inner-strength, and, above all, inner-peace. It's going to be very difficult, but someone would need to help the child to be more passive about the assaults and not ...


3

At this point a speech therapy is your best choice. And don't worry, you are doing good in talking to him a lot. Just be careful of one thing... Don't make him feel any less, or discouraged or don't pressure him to talk. Be very very patient with him. This isn't an easy disorder. He will eventually talk, just be really patient with him and make him ...


3

This is a very difficult question to answer, for the following reasons: Autism spectrum disorders are incredibly varied. The medical definition of autism is changing: the DSM IV definition is quite different from the soon-to-be-adopted DSM V definition. The legal definition of autism (at least in the US) is completely different from the medical definition ...


3

While you have sign language, have you tried sign supported speech? My eldest son is hard of hearing. For his first couple of years of school, he went to a special school for children with severe speech and language difficulties. He was one of the few children there with a 'technical' hearing problem; most had problems somewhere on the autistic spectrum. ...



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