Hot answers tagged

118

You are 21. You are an adult under Egyptian law. If you need missing papers, you can apply for them without having a guardian. You only need someone to vouch that you live with them, which brings us to: Do you have any person you trust you can talk to? Can this person shelter you or provide you with shelter elsewhere? Don't go to Churches: You surely know ...


57

Babies/children build up their immune systems by being exposed to germs and dirt. Keeping them away from germs and dirt actually gives them a weaker immune system. (http://www.webmd.com/parenting/d2n-stopping-germs-12/kids-and-dirt-germs) This is not to say that you should bring your baby hang out with plague victims. Some germs (mold etc) can make baby ...


53

You are the victim of abuse. You do not deserve to live in fear. You do not deserve to be hit, or to be shouted at. You father's behaviour is not acceptable. You might want to look for organisations in your country that can provide help and advice to women in your situation. I don't speak Arabic, and so I can't do a search for organisations.


29

Simple answer - these feelings are normal and not necessarily an indication of her sexuality, just a child's confusion and anxiety over physical intimacy. There is nothing to be concerned about, nothing special you or your daughter needs to do. Just let time reveal her sexuality. When it happens, she'll know it and if she believes that there's nothing ...


27

Take him to a psychologist. Not because he has a disorder, but because he is highly intelligent and both you and he need to learn how to deal with this gift. Your son needs peers who share his intelligence. I don't know where you live, but any psychologist worth the name knows of local organizations that help highly intelligent children socialize with other ...


23

(Disclaimer: I am not a doctor, your doctor or your girlfriend's doctor) It is possible that your girlfriend is experiencing postpartum obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). The hormonal changes during and after pregnancy are associated with multiple mental health issues, most prominent postpartum depression, but also the lesser known postpartum anxiety and ...


21

sorry to hear about your situation. It is for sure a very difficult situation. The fact you are feeling anxiety is natural and very understandable, so don't be down on yourself for that. The fact you have survived shows your strength. I think you are seeing the situation with great clarity. Living with ongoing anxiety is definitely best avoided if at all ...


18

Ask her why she is afraid of turning out to be lesbian, and address that.


14

Small traumas are a part of life, and learning to accept that is part of growing up. Some thoughts: Talk about it. When discussing the incident use calming language: It was an accident, and sometimes accidents happen. One time I had an accident (describe briefly) and I hurt my leg (or whatever). It scared me, but then after a while I didn't really think ...


13

I think her reaction is not unusual. Her safe space was violated, and it takes a while for it to start feeling safe again. My parents had similar reactions when their home was broken into: startling at shadows and sudden sounds, fitful sleep, and some apprehension when entering the house. It goes away slowly. My gut reaction is to offer as much comfort as ...


13

This is not a sexual orientation issue. It is an anxiety problem that happens to have sexual orientation as its focus. The issue here is that she is having intense anxiety about this idea, and it is interrupting her ability to cope with life. While reassurance often works as a first line treatment, it can also make things worse. If she's having to be ...


13

Sounds scary. I would advise you to join the army. The army in Egypt has a two year term of service which will go by in no time - as a woman, administrative and medical jobs are the only available role. If you join as a volunteer, you will get much better treatment than if you were conscripted and you might even become an officer. Working in this type of ...


12

Without a thought, to protect my daughter, I would happily and honorably sacrifice my life. I have actually kidnapped her from her mother (legally, yes), denied legal visitation after being asked what to do when her mother went into a bar and she had to sleep in a plastic bag behind a bush outside, and rescued her when my ex-father in-law remanded her to my ...


11

One of my daughters has seizures and neurologically-caused muscle tremors. Trust me, they are very distinct from a baby's excited quivering. Babies are still learning how to control their bodies. Something like keeping your arm from shaking seems easy, but is actually quite complicated from a control systems point of view. Especially if a doctor has ...


11

Poor little guy. Try searching for information on "childhood fears" and "night terrors", those are the usual terms used. Here's one set of basic recommendations: General Guidelines for Any Age When your child is afraid -- whether at age 5 or 15 -- remember to approach the fears with respect. Chansky suggests following these basic guidelines: ...


9

Show him Star Trek, the original series (Kirk, Spock, McCoy & c.). From episode 1 on. Seriously, if there's a simple way to communicate optimism, inclusion, love for science and empathy for other beings, it is this sci-fi show. Brilliant as he is, he will surely appreciate the ongoing debate between rationality (Spock) and passion (McCoy), and the ...


8

Before anyone misinterprets what I say here, I have no desire to dismiss or diminish issues of sexual orientation. This is just a possibility. The validity of her orientation is not in question; her suffering is. Your daughter is suffering, regardless of her true/ultimate sexual orientation. If she is having thoughts that cause her such dismay, there may be ...


8

Life is, indeed, meaningless. There's nothing wrong with your kid. I was just like him - I had zero friends and didn't like talking to anyone. Then I gradually began to become more social, and now, in my mid-thirties, I have friends begging to hang out with me every single day of the week. Life is wonderful - but yeah, still meaningless overall. Don't ...


7

One of the key elements of a parenting course I attended was to introduce the accidents/dangers in controlled environment. (ofcourse it was with respect to fire, sharp things etc, but could be tried here). You need to understand what part of the accidents the child is remembering. The gunshot or breaking of glass with no apparent reason (to her). If it ...


7

I know this sounds strange... but instead of trying to figure out what to say, I would instead listen to her - what is going on inside her, in her head and in her heart - her fears and her longings. And then validate them. It's real for her. Telling her more information isn't going to stop her from being afraid. Daughter - mommy I'm terrified I'm going to ...


6

I'll comment on the sleep issue since the other issues seem to be addressed. Do whatever it takes to get your child the calm and sleep she needs. Focus on a very regular sleep ritual, comfort, teddy bear, flower essence, whatever, then if necessary some sleep medication (more on this later), then a song, a short story, and a goodnight kiss! talking ...


6

Oh my GOD! Your son is terrific. He is 1 in a million. Don't push him for anything(at least for now). First delve into his mind and "study" all the things he thinks. If you want to have conversation with him, you are gonna have get into his mindset. First of all, believe what he said is true then question him seriously about the statements and their ...


6

I'm across the border from you in Israel. I happen to know a Beduin girl who was in a very similar situation to you, and she claimed that it is very very common. I lost touch with her when she did the only thing that she could do to leave her father: marry. She married the first man she could, I believe she is his second wife. I realize that the suggestion ...


5

When my oldest was having trouble being dropped at daycare, I moved the decision for how long I would stick around at dropoff onto her. (She was about 3 iirc.) We didn't have a traumatic experience like yours complicating things, but I think this might help for you. I simply told her that each morning I would stay until she told me to go. The immediate ...


5

Bless her little heart; what a scary thing to go through. And bless y'all's hearts too; this sounds absolutely horrible to have gone through. Have you looked into therapy? Sounds like something that a professional who has dealt with grief and trauma issues might have some insights in handling.


5

I think your daughter is simply working incomplete information -- she has analytical ability beyond her age, but the insufficient information to base her analysis on. Ask her questions -- a lot. "Why do people need to pick a career", "How long does it take to learn". This will help you understand where the knowledge gaps are so you can fill them in. Use ...


5

Start by explaining to her that who she is and what she does are not the same thing. Just because two people are fire fighters, for example, does not mean they are the same people. They can think and act very differently, like very different things, and generally behave very differently when they aren't working. Once the concepts of "who you are" and "...


5

My little girl had a similar bout of bad dreams and was able to overcome it after we convinced her that she could control the dream, i.e. if the room was on fire she could become a super hero that could spray water out of her arms and put the fire out. It worked for her, hopefully you can find something similar for your boy. One more bit of advice we ...


5

Congratulations - your son has discovered nihilism at the age of nine. My question is - how would you react if an adult you knew and cared about made such a speech? Personally I'd find it an interesting conversation to have, to which I would probably disagree with their position thoroughly. My answer to the nihilist question is 'Life is to be enjoyed, and ...


5

Biting her nails is only a symptom, so 1, 2, and 3 are not getting to the core issue. Indeed, it is also quite possible that you drawing attention to it is increasing her anxiety. Solution 5 might save the nails, but it doesn't address the anxiety. Solution 4 or some variant of it is the only way to go, addressing the anxiety. Possibly some way of ...



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