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4

Most children who are older and have bad feeling towards their parents have it due to malformed boundaries. It's likely that the issues with finance and moving house etc are actually surface symptoms. The real issues are more likely to be around the personal relationship he has with his family, since I know that if I have a close and positive relationship ...


4

Well, you're an adult now, seems time to act like one and confront your parents. That's assuming it's possible to have a reasonable discussion with them on some subjects without too much of a negative impact...or be ready to deal with those negative impacts. IMHO, the main advantages to you "coming clean" would be : That's an indicator of how mature you ...


3

If you can't risk the chance you will have more restrictions, you just continue as you have been until graduate and live on your own. But if you want to break the pattern, of course you will risk have more restrictions (though it's hard to happen because you don't tell them about your prior misdeeds so your parents don't know you are hiding things from ...


2

I'm not sure you can find a way to interest them in visiting you. Perhaps you could focusing on finding ways to show your interest in them. Call them on holidays or other times, ask how they are doing, if they have plans for the occasion, how education or work is going (depending on their ages) and other easy to talk about items. Maybe, if you can, ...


2

I would leave the past out of it. However, it would be fine to pick a couple of areas in which to set up some boundaries. This means taking a stance that something is your decision, that you will be handling with autonomy. Be prepared for anxiety on their part. When there is something that causes anxiety, it is helpful to prepare them ahead of time, so ...


2

It sounds like he is struggling with addiction issues. Stealing liquor is a huge red flag. With addiction, things like values, ethics and planning for the future go out the window. This is not a reflection of the person underneath but a symptom of the problem. If you can help him work through that problem, you will get the person back. Unfortunately, ...


1

A lot of this is obviously opinion based; although he has done much, he should not forget that without them he would not be here in the first place. They have been there for 3 months, what is that in a life time? Yes, it is inconvenient that he has to help them, and it is hard. But now that they may have found another place he doesn't want to move them? ...


1

I understand how you are feeling. I had an absent mother and father who divorced when I was young, and left me with my grandmother. I was not clothed, fed, helped with homework, or supported in any way by them. My grandma did the best she could, but she was poor and had cancer. I worked and put myself through college and graduate school. I now have my ...



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