89
votes
16answers
10k views

How can you deal with tantrums without spanking?

My son just turned 2, and he started throwing more tantrums on us. He doesn't eat well or drink enough milk ... and he is becoming more adamant and says "No" more often. If we force him to drink ...
88
votes
14answers
42k views

My 13-year-old son made a foolish and wasteful donation. How can I teach him he was wrong?

My son is a 13-year-old honor roll student. He comes home and has all his chores done by the time I get home. He is a great kid. He was hanging out with his friends; this group has been friends ...
79
votes
13answers
25k views

How can I prevent my 8-year-old from spending time with his bad friend?

Backstory: My 8 yr old son is a bright, gentle, etc, kid who attends public school. My wife and I have no TV, we disallow violent games (simulated killing is not allowed), we don't have video games, ...
73
votes
20answers
12k views

Why would you lie to your children about Santa?

Christmas is an awesome event for children with lots of presents, but I've been thinking: Aren't the negative things it brings (telling them the truth eventually) worse than the good things? You can ...
66
votes
12answers
13k views

Impact on kids NOT having TV?

My question is, could it be bad, in some way, for a child to not have cable/satellite television? My husband and I are thinking about children soon. We haven't had cable hooked up in 6 or 7 years and ...
65
votes
18answers
18k views

Is having a sibling better for a child?

We have several friends who have two or more children, while myself and my wife only have one. Often when we visit them, it seems that the conversation always turns to, "When are you having your ...
65
votes
12answers
5k views

Should you let a toddler win?

We've started playing some simple games with my 2-year-old son, including a simple age-appropriate matching game. He enjoys playing, but seems (to me, at least) more focused on playing over winning. ...
64
votes
10answers
15k views

My 2.5 years old daughter asks to learn to read

My daughter is a big fan of books. She can spend one hour in a row looking at her books, and often asks my wife and me to read her a story. We are a french family. For 2 weeks, she's been looking at ...
63
votes
17answers
21k views

How should I handle a little boy who likes girls' toys?

I have a 5-year-old boy who likes to play with girl stuff. He doesn't like to dress up or anything like that, he just loves to dress up the Barbies, and he will even help me with my clothes by telling ...
62
votes
12answers
4k views

What are some strategies for raising a bilingual child?

We are planning on raising our child bi-lingual. The plan is for my husband to only speak English to her and I would only speak Tagalog (a dialect of the Philippines). I have asked my parents to also ...
59
votes
16answers
4k views

Is bribing children with cash incentives a good idea?

I pay my 5.5yo $1 if she sleeps in her own bed and take $1 in rent when she sleeps in our bed. I've also taken to offering her $1 to pick up her 2.5 year old brother's Lego messes. Good or bad? ...
54
votes
11answers
3k views

Programming with a baby

I'm wondering what parents programmers (or really any working-at-a-computer job) have to say about staying at home with an infant while trying to get some work done; is it at all feasible? How much ...
54
votes
8answers
12k views

Can “The Giving Tree” be explained in a way that isn't an unhealthy lesson?

My son loves "The Giving Tree," by Shel Silverstein. And I also remember it being a favorite of mine as a kid. I vaguely remember it from childhood as having some mildly sad themes, and most people ...
53
votes
11answers
13k views

What's wrong with Dr Seuss?

Our toddler is about the right age to start enjoying Dr Seuss books, and I don't see anything wrong with them (I had one as a child which I loved). But my own mother (despite this) hates them, and so ...
53
votes
4answers
13k views

My 4-year-old refers to himself as me

Literally. Sometimes he will ascribe himself properties I have, and make me the child--he'll say "I'm a grown-up", "You can't sit in the front seat [in our car], it's not safe, I have to sit in the ...
52
votes
9answers
9k views

Is it ok to disagree in front of the kids?

We have this little discussion here: Should I let my baby play with oranges? I believe that it is always better for parents to avoid disagreeing, arguing, etc., in front of the kids, especially when ...
52
votes
16answers
8k views

Should I allow or forbid my son to visit the education of a religion that I do not share?

I'm an Agnostic. When the topic comes to religion, I try to explain to my seven year old son what religious persons believe and why I don't share that belief. Until recently, he shared my scepticism. ...
51
votes
17answers
24k views

How do you raise an intelligent and happy daughter in a sexist world?

I don't have enough space to explain my reasoning. I just don't want my daughter to be influenced by the media or the general opinions of "society". My daughter is a baby in my womb. I've decided no ...
51
votes
14answers
7k views

How should I handle an 8 year old lawyering and quibbling?

How should I handle an 8 year old lawyering and quibbling? E.g., anytime he has a rule, or a task, or is told what to do, his FIRST impulse is nearly 100% to find some fault with the technicality or ...
51
votes
9answers
20k views

How do you cope in the first few months?

How do you cope with the sleeplessness, the stress, the fear in the first few months? Our baby just came home yesterday. He was five weeks premature, so he was in the NICU for two weeks. The stress ...
50
votes
6answers
5k views

Is it safer to install a back seat car seat behind the driver or behind the passenger?

I have a car seat installed for my baby girl. At the behest of my wife, we installed the car seat directly behind the driver, rather than behind the passenger. She claims that this is because the ...
49
votes
18answers
5k views

How do you teach a child religious views?

Since a few weeks my 2yo son refuses to pray for his food. His refusal probably has nothing to do with religion; being a 2yo he simply refuses to do anything we don't force him to. Nevertheless, this ...
49
votes
17answers
20k views

How can I prevent my parents' divorce?

I am a young teenager, younger than 16. (I do not want to give my age online) My dad told me he wants a divorce, but I don't want my parents divorced. My dad says he can't stand my mom anymore. My ...
49
votes
12answers
17k views

My parents are taking over my life, I think I'm going insane

I'm 16, and I don't know what to do. My parents are controlling everything I do and watching everything I do. I think I'm going insane. I thought a counselor or psychiatrist could help me but it ...
49
votes
11answers
9k views

How can I make my kids passionate in science while being religious?

Please be considerate in your answers. We are an observant jewish family, although I was educated in secular institutions. I feel that I have a wealth of knowledge that I want to pass to my kids ...
49
votes
15answers
6k views

How can I help my child who is advanced in programming to meet others at the same skill level?

My child just turned 14 years old, and one of his hobbies is programming. He knows JavaScript, HTML, CSS, jQuery, Ruby, Python, some Java, and a bit of C++, Bash, and PHP. He also uses Git, Vim, and ...
47
votes
8answers
4k views

Should we circumcise our son?

My wife and I will be having a son in about a month and we are still deciding if we should have him circumcised. There does not seem to be a strong medical opinion on the matter but we are ...
47
votes
10answers
13k views

My toddler calls me “Mommy”, but I'm his father

It was cute and funny at first that both of us were being called Mommy, and I still don't really mind. My wife and I laugh and try to correct him, pointing to pictures, ourselves and repeating the ...
46
votes
16answers
14k views

Should I stop my mother in law visiting when she doesn't respect me as the father figure?

Sadly these are her words, not mine. Why is this posted in this QA site? Because I can't see how it is good for the children that she (when my wife is not around) shouts at me in front of them; cuts ...
44
votes
16answers
12k views

How should a jobless father advise his son when he refuses to study because of his educated jobless dad?

Suppose father XXX holds a college degree, usually comes home late and suddenly one fine day, stays at home. He lost his job. His son sees this happening. The father is a hard-working man, always ...
44
votes
13answers
27k views

What is a positive way to handle a boy who acts like a girl?

My 3yo regularly plays and acts like a girl. For example, he likes to take his arm out of one sleeve on his shirt and pretend he's a princess. He loves to dress up in his mom and sister's clothes. He ...
42
votes
14answers
12k views

How should I inform parents if their children are bothering me?

Today, on the bus, I was seated a row behind a mother and her young daughter (I guess about 5-6 years old), and the child just couldn't stay quiet: she was singing constantly, saying "byebye, please ...
42
votes
14answers
4k views

How does one formally educate a gifted child without wrecking childhood?

I have a very bright child (just turned 7), he is not a genius by any stretch, but he reads way past his level (really liked Hatchet, and Call of the Wild), understands somewhat complex mathematics ...
41
votes
10answers
14k views

My 4 year-old says she doesn't love her mom

My 4 year-old daughter keeps saying to her mom that she doesn't like/love her, and refuses to retract the comment or say sorry. Is this "normal"? A "phase"? It's pretty hard for mom to take. For ...
40
votes
30answers
13k views

My pre-schooler is out of control, and I feel like my parents are undermining my relationship and authority with her

Alright, I guess a little back story would help. I am a single mother and an only child, I will be 21 in a few months. I've graduated high school with honors and have been raising my daughter on my ...
40
votes
15answers
12k views

How should a stepfather respond to “You are not my Father!”?

So the situation is that I'm not the real father of my son. I call him my son since I love him very much, but he is my girlfriends son from her previous relationship. I'm afraid though... He does ...
40
votes
6answers
7k views

Should I try to protect my son from hearing that his father wants nothing to do with his two boys?

My ex husband, who was near 30 when we had our first child, and 33 when we had our second, hasn't seen his children since 2008.. We broke up when the youngest was 6 months but as his girlfriend was ...
39
votes
21answers
7k views

What are some do's and dont's for an effective bedtime ritual?

I think most parents agree that it's helpful to follow some fixed ritual when putting a child to bed. What elements in such rituals are particularly useful, and what should be avoided? There are ...
39
votes
10answers
9k views

Too many languages?

I am actually a language researcher, but when it comes to my own situation I have a hard time being objective and make some choices for my own family. My husband and I are expecting our first child, ...
39
votes
13answers
4k views

As an atheist, how should I explain theism to my children?

I have two competing interests here and I'm not entirely sure how to handle this. On one hand I feel that the short answer, to questions about gods, of "some people believe that, but it's not true" is ...
38
votes
11answers
112k views

Just found out my 13 year old girl is Bi and dating a 17 year old girl in an “open” relationship. Huh? Now what?

A little background- my daughter has never had a boyfriend/girlfriend or relationship and is in 8th grade. She has always been young for her age and had a tough time identifying with other girls and ...
38
votes
10answers
5k views

How do you respond to a toddler who endlessly says “why?”?

My wife and I had joked about expecting endless "why?" questions from our son while we were expecting, and I thought I was prepared for it. In fact, I thought the stereotypical constant flow of "why? ...
38
votes
13answers
15k views

My 4.5-year-old son has no dominant hand

We never really knew if my son was left or right-handed. He can use any most of the time. A doctor said that sometimes it takes longer time to know which hand is dominant, so we never paid attention ...
37
votes
12answers
18k views

I want to expose my 5-year-old daughter to boys and girls toys equally, but she just turned her nose up at Star Wars. What do I do?

My aspiration is to give my daughter experiences of boys and girls toys. My background is that I work as a software engineer and had experiences of LEGO, Meccano, programming and sci-fi movies. I ...
37
votes
11answers
6k views

Should I really be insisting that my daughter finish eating her meal?

Like many young children, my 4.5 year old daughter will often stop eating her supper (6 PMish - she has breakfast and lunch at daycare) and say she's not hungry. My instinctive initial response is to ...
37
votes
3answers
6k views

Should I let my child play with gun toys?

I've noticed a great many parents do everything within their power to prevent their children playing with toy guns and weapons. As a 30-something, I grew up with toy swords, bows and guns, action men ...
37
votes
4answers
3k views

How to prepare children for impending death of a parent?

My wife has been told that she has a limited amount of time left due to an illness, the average life expectancy is 7-8 years after onset, of which we have used up 7. With excellent management, and ...
36
votes
9answers
12k views

If my 4-year-old asks me “why”, what kind of “why” does he mean?

My 4-year-old asks me questions like "Why is water transparent?" What kind of "why" does he mean?: What sense does it make for water to be transparent? How is it achieved that water is transparent? ...
36
votes
6answers
9k views

3 year-old boy wants constant attention, hits and deliberately poops in underpants when he doesn't get it

I have a nearly 3-year-old boy whose energy has become near-limitless, coupled with new neediness, aggression, and defiance. He wants to run around and be played with for the entire day. He is unable ...
36
votes
9answers
57k views

Why does my infant wake crying the instant we put him in his bed?

This is probably a classic but here goes. Some time between midnight and three my 9 month old will wake crying. Often he is hungry or has gas and can be fairly easily consoled and falls asleep in our ...

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