Age specific questions from about 13 years to about 19 years. Younger: pre-teen. Older: adult-child.

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81
votes
14answers
41k views

My 13-year-old son made a foolish and wasteful donation. How can I teach him he was wrong?

My son is a 13-year-old honor roll student. He comes home and has all his chores done by the time I get home. He is a great kid. He was hanging out with his friends; this group has been friends ...
47
votes
15answers
15k views

How can I prevent my parents' divorce?

I am a young teenager, younger than 16. (I do not want to give my age online) My dad told me he wants a divorce, but I don't want my parents divorced. My dad says he can't stand my mom anymore. My ...
38
votes
11answers
108k views

Just found out my 13 year old girl is Bi and dating a 17 year old girl in an “open” relationship. Huh? Now what?

A little background- my daughter has never had a boyfriend/girlfriend or relationship and is in 8th grade. She has always been young for her age and had a tough time identifying with other girls and ...
38
votes
15answers
10k views

How should a stepfather respond to “You are not my Father!”?

So the situation is that I'm not the real father of my son. I call him my son since I love him very much, but he is my girlfriends son from her previous relationship. I'm afraid though... He does ...
35
votes
13answers
37k views

What should we do when our 15 year old wants sex with his 13 year old girlfriend?

So the other day I walked in on our teenager and caught his girlfriend with her pants down. It is quite clear what they were intending to do. Now he claims he had no intention of having sex with ...
30
votes
15answers
16k views

Why does my 16-year-old hate me?

My 16-year-old son says the most awful things to me. I feel he is deliberately trying to upset/provoke me constantly. For example, last night at the dinner table he said, "I am not going to try to ...
29
votes
21answers
16k views

Should I expect my 20 year old son to get a job while at University?

My son is now 20 years old, still living with us at home and goes to University three days a week. He has never had a job. Since he was a child I have tried to encourage him to do tasks for pocket ...
28
votes
19answers
19k views

Why does my daughter smile and start to laugh at me when I am noticeably really angry at her?

My daughter is 11 years old and has been diagnosed with high functioning austism along with sensory processing disorder. I am a single father and have raised her alone since she was two years old. We ...
27
votes
8answers
4k views

What should I teach my teenager about condoms?

Let me preface the question by saying that I'm not asking this question in order to endorse or promote teenage sex. Even if my child wants to wait until he is married to have sex, as a parent, I still ...
27
votes
4answers
2k views

How to handle disclosing a parent's suicide to friends and their parents

I have three children 12, 13 and 19 and their father committed suicide 10 years ago (when they were 1, 3 and 9). They have suffered through many childhood taunts, at times, including: "Your father ...
25
votes
8answers
4k views

Should 18+ kids still have a tight schema for bed and PC-usage?

I'm not a parent, or in any parenting position. I am however kind of worried because of some rules in the house. I've been 18 for a few months now. And I still have quite a tight schema for bed and ...
23
votes
3answers
6k views

14 yr old lesbian/bi daughter

My 14 year old daughter recently broke up with a boy she was dating for 7 months because she fell in love with a girl. I totally support her as I had a similar experience when I was in my 30's. My ...
20
votes
14answers
11k views

Do parents of teens need a locked liquor cabinet?

I had this debate with some friends who have older children. We keep our liquor in the cupboard above the fridge. When they get a bit older (still just 8 and 10) and could potentially be tempted ...
19
votes
5answers
847 views

When (if ever) is it appropriate to spy on your teenager's texts?

I'm an active member of Android Enthusiasts Stack Exchange and recently came across this question by a parent, asking for advice on spying on his teenage (I'm assuming) son's texts without getting ...
18
votes
6answers
8k views

How do I approach my 13-year-old daughter's confusion regarding her sexuality?

My 13-year-old daughter is fascinated and obsessed with another girl. She is not able to do her normal routine things. She has not even talked to the girl yet the girl occupies her full mental space. ...
18
votes
3answers
3k views

How should a parent react when their child comes out of the closet to them?

Several of my good friends, including my best friend, are gay/lesbian/queer. All of them have told me that coming out was one of the most emotional and difficult things they've ever had to do. Their ...
17
votes
11answers
3k views

I am 24 years old. I found marijuana and ecstasy my 17 year old sister's room. What should I do?

I went to borrow bus fair from my sister this morning and found a small clear bottle with a small amount of marijuana and four mysteriously labeled, handmade pills in her change box. I don't know what ...
17
votes
8answers
3k views

How to deal with a teenager who wants his parents to buy him everything his friends have?

How do I teach my son the value of money and to differentiate between a need and a want? The problem I am facing is that he is 19 years old, not 5 years old. He is my youngest son and to be honest I ...
16
votes
11answers
5k views

How can I motivate my 16 yo daughter to do something valuable with her life?

I have a 16 year old daughter who, whenever she has free time wastes it on things that I think are futile like Facebook, Tumblr, etc. She's also performing poorly at school. I've talked to her about ...
15
votes
6answers
486 views

Coping and overcoming a rational fear

On Friday my daughter was hit by a car while crossing the crosswalk to school. (Side note: she was released from the hospital and appears to be doing OK, but taking her to a Dr for a full eval ...
14
votes
3answers
3k views

Teenage daughter and stepfather

I have a 16 year old who has no respect for her stepfather. They hardly communicate and each time he says something she snaps or makes a stroppy or contradictory comment. He sometimes loses his temper ...
14
votes
2answers
2k views

How to restrain my 13-year-old pubescent sister?

Just to understand my position: I, as her older brother (she is without father, 13 and I'm 24), have to sometimes act like her parent, because mom just can't restrain her, when she starts yelling or ...
13
votes
4answers
3k views

How young is too young to start wearing makeup?

A couple of us in the office today were talking about young girls and makeup. One mentioned that his daughter is thirteen and already wearing makeup, another mentioned her niece wears makeup as well ...
12
votes
14answers
15k views

How to deal with a teenage daughter who refuses to dress modestly

My husband and I and are the parents of three wonderful children, but we've been having some issues lately with our 15 year old, our middle child. She continues to wear skirts that are much too short ...
12
votes
8answers
2k views

What if my kids don't want me to speak my native language?

My children are raised multilingual; we live in Austria and they learn all their German from my wife and from the world around us. I'm Danish and I want my kids to know that language too, so since ...
12
votes
5answers
3k views

My 15-year-old daughter is having sex with her boyfriend

My daughter is 15 and her boyfriend is 17. They are having sex and I'm not sure if I want her to. On top of that, her boyfriend is a drug dealer, but she thinks that he is cool because he makes a ...
12
votes
5answers
13k views

12 year old with major tantrums that I have no idea how to control help needed

I have a 12 year old daughter who is having screaming, door slamming, hour-long rages at the slightest thing. I also have 2 older daughters, aged 17 and 18, who never did this after they were 2 and ...
11
votes
6answers
2k views

I suspect my teenager is using illegal drugs; what should I do?

Beyond the usual teenage mood-swings, my teen's behavior has become unusually erratic. He stays out late, and seems to go out of his way to avoid me when he comes home. His sleep patterns seem ...
11
votes
3answers
491 views

Too many variables at play — troubled “son”

So, here's the story. My ex-girlfriend, whom I have an 11 year old son with, had a son before ours with a man who has never seen his son past the age of one. He's now 16. He grew up a generally happy ...
10
votes
10answers
11k views

teenage child with severe daily temper tantrums and whining

My 13 year old daughter has severe and daily outbursts - sometimes as many as 10 a day - from time she gets up till time she goes to bed. This has been going on since she was of walking and talking ...
10
votes
7answers
2k views

Monitoring a computer-literate teen

I would like to monitor my 16 year old boy's web activities, but I have been struggling to do so. Since he started his interest in computer programming, it's become an arms race. I've tried setting up ...
10
votes
6answers
3k views

How do I convince my daughter to agree that I want to quit my job and not strain our mother-daughter relationship?

I want to leave and start something on my own. But my husband is not working as well and I fear my daughter will feel bad to say that both her parents are not working. What should I do? I have enough ...
10
votes
4answers
33k views

How can I deal with my 12-year old son's rebellious behaviour?

My son is a very loving child and fun to be with usually....ever since he turned 12 he is suddenly the resident expert in the house on anything from how to drive a car to how become president. You ...
10
votes
3answers
895 views

How to deal with a bedwetting teenager?

My 13 year old still wets the bed. Over the years we have tried alarms, medication, waking him up at various times, controlling his drinking, charts (behaviour modification). He hates it and wants ...
10
votes
6answers
852 views

How do you respond to a teenager who has started to smoke?

How can you best handle this? Coming off as too strong and authoritative might invite "rebellion". Too lenient makes it seem okay. What is the best response for driving home the dangers and risks ...
10
votes
1answer
223 views

Relevant research to support father custody for children?

I have a friend who has children who are suffering an abusive situation with his ex-wife where she is physically, emotionally and verbally abusing their children. The situation is such that the ...
9
votes
7answers
9k views

How do you get a teenager to take shorter showers?

It's great that they think hygiene is important. It's a hassle that the bathroom is tied up. How do you get a teenager to be faster in the shower?
9
votes
4answers
3k views

My 12 year old has been blowing off homework, and now is writing on his clothes! Is this normal?

My 12 year old has been blowing off homework, and now is writing on his clothes! He plays hockey, which he loves. I stopped letting him play for his teams when his report card came back with bad ...
9
votes
5answers
586 views

How can we help our son deal with his girlfriend's emotional issues?

So our son is only 15, but he has fallen pretty heavily for a girl who apparently comes with a lot of "baggage". She comes from a broken home and is constantly having issues. Our son spend a lot of ...
9
votes
2answers
2k views

How to go about regaining the trust of my child?

Having experienced parental alienation syndrome, my child is very reticent and unresponsive to my attempts in rebuilding our relationship. The condition is very much like sulking, but with an ...
9
votes
7answers
3k views

Not sure what to do about my teen daughters stealing and lying

My daughter has been lying and stealing from us as well as someone she called her BFF. We give her consequences and she continues with her stealing and lying. Recently I found out that she was cutting ...
9
votes
5answers
406 views

16yo works TOO MUCH?

We have a lovely child who is very motivated in their schoolwork. They are getting straight A's, and are loved by all their teachers. They are autistic, and it seems that schoolwork is their new ...
9
votes
4answers
2k views

How should I react when my child is being teased at school?

If I have a child who is consistently made fun of at school, what should I do to help my child learn to cope, ignore, or respond to the situation. What should I do to help prevent the situation from ...
8
votes
7answers
5k views

My stepdaughter wants to go to California to see her girlfriend

My stepdaughter came out to us that shes gay. She has been talking to her girlfriend who lives in California and asked her dad if he could take her. I said, "No she's only 14 yrs old. Would you take ...
8
votes
6answers
2k views

Is 15 years old too old to ground for bad grades?

I have a 15 year old that has been grounded 60% of the time the past two years. Most of the groundings are around his grades or forgetting to do homework. When he is grounded at first he buckles ...
8
votes
6answers
781 views

How to get my sister to use correct spelling while typing on computer?

I am sure that I am treading on eggshells here as this is a matter of opinion, but please do read on. I absolutely resent when people use incorrect spelling for 90% of their words, on purpose. My ...
8
votes
3answers
2k views

How to get a 17 year old son to realize that laundry is not that hard to do and to do it on a regular basis?

Our other kids that are now grown have pretty much always done their laundry since they were like 13 years old. This son is 17 and probably has only done his own laundry, all on his own, like 10 times ...
8
votes
2answers
692 views

Techniques for handling teenagers “playing dumb” about things

It is hard to phrase this question, as it is an psychologically oblique problem. My teenage son will often ask questions or make glib observations about things, he already knows the answer to, or ...
8
votes
4answers
408 views

Building self-esteem while encouraging a tidy, acceptable appearance

My daughter is currently 10. I have always tried to encourage her to not be overly concerned with other people's opinion of her, and I think that this has largely succeeded. Like any kid, she gets ...
8
votes
2answers
1k views

What are appropriate sexual boundaries between siblings?

I have three children, my younger two are a 13 year old boy and a 12 year old girl. They are both maturing and going through puberty. Gone are the days of my little son doing little naked dances, ...