Questions for those who are not yet in the teenage years and are beyond the first few years of schooling.

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6
votes
5answers
483 views

My 11 year old Granddaughter told her Father today shes a lesbian

My Granddaughter told her Dr. and Father she is a lesbian, and asked to talk to a counselor. I'm wondering at this age, do they really know for sure or because they hang with girls who think they are, ...
1
vote
2answers
108 views

Is there any research on pros/cons of allowing young kids to participate on social online networks?

Is there any research on pros/cons of allowing young kids (8-11) to participate on social online networks (age appropriate ones, not Facebook)? Just to be clear, I mean participation with the ...
3
votes
1answer
182 views

12 y/o daughter gives one-word answers to every question

My 12 y/o daughter used to be very open. A great communicator. Very warm and gregarious. A few months ago (right around the time her body started changing) she gradually started changing her pattern. ...
12
votes
8answers
2k views

What if my kids don't want me to speak my native language?

My children are raised multilingual; we live in Austria and they learn all their German from my wife and from the world around us. I'm Danish and I want my kids to know that language too, so since ...
3
votes
1answer
77 views

11-year-old with sleeping problems

My 11-year-old son has trouble sleeping alone, because of what he calls "nightmares". I don't think they are sleeping nightmares, but rather overactive imagination causing frightening thoughts while ...
-1
votes
2answers
251 views

What is an effective dating policy for a 12-year-old boy? [closed]

This is similar but not identical to When is it safe to start letting our children go into relationships? My 12-year-old son is precocious in terms of height and puberty, but emotionally he is out of ...
5
votes
2answers
138 views

How best to take advantage of a child's extended vacation

This is a little more complicated than it might seem, so I'll give some back-story. We have 2 kids: The oldest, 11, was born to us during my first year of college, and I was only intermittently ...
6
votes
4answers
2k views

Encopresis, I'm at my wits end? Does anybody have suggestions?

My 12 year old daughter has been dealing with retentive encopresis since age 6. She avoids going to the toilet at all. This results in soiling and the production of an amazing huge toilet-clogging ...
2
votes
2answers
185 views

Dealing with an arrogant child

My sister is about 11 years old. She listens to everyone around her except her family. She believes that we don't care about her. Since my family was extremely busy with jobs, we did not focus on her ...
6
votes
3answers
411 views

8 year old punishes himself for bad behaviour

My 8 year old step-son is still rather sensitive for his age, and sometimes takes being disciplined very hard. When he genuinely feels bad about something he's done wrong and we tell him off, he will ...
10
votes
4answers
33k views

How can I deal with my 12-year old son's rebellious behaviour?

My son is a very loving child and fun to be with usually....ever since he turned 12 he is suddenly the resident expert in the house on anything from how to drive a car to how become president. You ...
2
votes
3answers
164 views

10 year old refuses to go to bed

Our 10 year old stepdaughter has trouble going to bed at night. She refuses to go to bed, and fights us very hard, to the point where our only hope of her going to bed is to physically pick her up and ...
4
votes
2answers
114 views

How to mediate between my spouse and stepchild and help our family develop a healthier relationship?

I have been with my wife for about six years. She has a daughter, currently age 11, from her first marriage who has lived with us during almost all of that time (sometimes stays with her father, but ...
1
vote
2answers
199 views

How to provide the most support to children as an 'uncle' with only monthly visits

As a side effect of some volunteering I do, I find myself playing something of an 'uncle' like relationship for some of the children of women I've volunteering with. I love children and am more then ...
28
votes
19answers
19k views

Why does my daughter smile and start to laugh at me when I am noticeably really angry at her?

My daughter is 11 years old and has been diagnosed with high functioning austism along with sensory processing disorder. I am a single father and have raised her alone since she was two years old. We ...
18
votes
12answers
1k views

Email and social media for pre-teens

My daughter is 11 and I discovered that she had a Facebook account and a personal email account. These were two things my wife and I had told her she wasn't allowed to have. I felt she was still too ...
2
votes
4answers
3k views

11 year old stubborn boy

My 11 year son is an intelligent and extrovert boy . He does not want to study and take care of his belongings. I have to continuously tell him to do his routine work like bathing , brushing teeth ...
11
votes
4answers
4k views

How to deal with my 12 year old's rebellious behavior?

My son just turned 12 a few months ago, and boy is he a handful! He does not obey anything I say, curses at me, calls me names, throws tantrums, and hesitates to go to school every single day. I ...
7
votes
4answers
593 views

How to make my 11-year-old boy more responsible?

My 11-year-old boy seems irresponsible. I understand that he is still young, but I would like to have some advice on how I need to deal with him when he makes a mistake. For example, he damaged his ...
25
votes
8answers
16k views

Should I tell my 10-year old son, how screwed-up Cinderella is?

My 10-year old boy recently told me that he likes the Cinderella fairy tale. Some fairy tales including this one, have several layers of meaning and sometimes they guide people's life decisions. ...
15
votes
8answers
13k views

How to handle a 11y/o son who act like a girl?

I have an 11 y/o son who is showing a tendency towards becoming gay. People have seen him walking like a girl but I haven't. I'm thinking that they are just judgmental. On his computer games he ...
8
votes
12answers
5k views

How can I get my 12-year old physically active or into sports when he's never been?

My son is 12-years old, and he has never been into traditional competitive sports. I'm fine with this - not all kids are. He played baseball for a short period when he was 8, but he didn't really ...
9
votes
7answers
2k views

How do I convince my eleven-year-old to practice her dancing?

My eleven-year-old daughter who has been in dance classes since she was four. She loves ballet, and she loves to perform. However, she does not care for the stretching and practicing that are part ...
3
votes
3answers
132 views

Adjusting to boarding school

We have sent our 12 year old daughter to a boarding school. How can i help her not to miss her mother to an extent that she is upset the whole day, has bouts of crying? She has been away for a week, ...
0
votes
3answers
178 views

Explain Pre-Teens and Teens the problems of a surveillance state and internet privacy [closed]

I want to present an audience, consisting of mostly teens and pre-teens, the problems of a surveillance state, e.g. if everything is recorded what you are doing. That leads to an internal scissor in ...
5
votes
3answers
221 views

Should a precocious child be prevented from devoting too much time to their primary interest?

I know a couple of children in their early or pre-teen years who have already accomplished more than many adults accomplish in their entire careers. These accomplishments seem to be a combination of ...
6
votes
1answer
123 views

How should screen time be treated to balance the pro of education resources on the internet and con of decreased involvement in other activities?

Screen time is a tricky subject. Around middle school age there are very good uses of technology that emerge where can child can develop healthy hobbies fueled by self-motivation (which may later turn ...
3
votes
3answers
341 views

Should I allow my child to participate in dangerous sports?

When should a child be allowed to take part in "dangerous" sports or activities? I'm thinking of letting my son try motocross when he's "old enough" - but when is that (when is a child old enough to ...
2
votes
2answers
399 views

How to help an 8 year old with short attention span and obsessive character?

I need some advice on how to motivate my 8 year old daughter to pay attention more at school and achieve higher grades. She seems to have a short attention span and seems more interested in break ...
3
votes
2answers
225 views

How to deal with extreme misbehavior of younger siblings?

I have a 3yr old a 5 year old and an 11 yr old who have just been the most exceptionally worst behaved children on this planet, between the 3&5 yr olds, they backchat, break things, have drawn on ...
35
votes
21answers
4k views

How can I help a child stay motivated in learning to program?

How could I help a smart preteen child (pre-teen) learn programming? He does well in school, and he has skipped 2 grades and is an introverted stereotypical nerd. He is very interested in web ...
47
votes
15answers
6k views

How can I help my child who is advanced in programming to meet others at the same skill level?

My child just turned 14 years old, and one of his hobbies is programming. He knows JavaScript, HTML, CSS, jQuery, Ruby, Python, some Java, and a bit of C++, Bash, and PHP. He also uses Git, Vim, and ...
8
votes
4answers
406 views

Building self-esteem while encouraging a tidy, acceptable appearance

My daughter is currently 10. I have always tried to encourage her to not be overly concerned with other people's opinion of her, and I think that this has largely succeeded. Like any kid, she gets ...
6
votes
2answers
671 views

How to deal with my 12 year old son's behaviour?

My son believes I don't do anything for him - I do everything I possibly can & yes there are things I forget to do (as I'm only human). He is sly & causes arguements between his father & ...
5
votes
5answers
992 views

Abusive behavior of 12 years old son

My 12 years old son hits, pushes, and teases his 7 years old sister. When my daughter was born he would constantly disturb me while feeding her and helping her. I tried to involve him in taking care ...
9
votes
4answers
3k views

My 12 year old has been blowing off homework, and now is writing on his clothes! Is this normal?

My 12 year old has been blowing off homework, and now is writing on his clothes! He plays hockey, which he loves. I stopped letting him play for his teams when his report card came back with bad ...
8
votes
3answers
800 views

Some strategies for maintaining adult relationships separately from children?

Some background. I have always been extremely careful about taking precautions to prevent my children from ever walking in on me when engaging in sexual activity. I've had a relationship with my next ...
9
votes
3answers
321 views

How can I assuage my pre-teen's fear of flying

My parents are moving to Florida soon and have asked for my help moving their car. I thought it would be nice to take my pre-teen daughter (almost 12 yo) with me on the ride down for a short visit. ...
2
votes
1answer
350 views

My 13 year old son has a friend whom he brushes off but yet my 11 year old son really likes

I have two sons. My older son has a friend whom he brushes off but yet my 11 year old son really likes. This friend is a good kid. My older son is upset that his friend is playing with his younger ...
4
votes
3answers
446 views

How can I explain “adult beverages” to my preteen?

We don't tend to drink much alcohol in our household; I occasionally drink a beer in the evening after the children are in bed or when my wife and I have a date night. So my preteen son doesn't have a ...
1
vote
2answers
382 views

Is jogging an appropriate activity for a pre-adolescent child?

This question was motivated by seeing a 6 or 7 year old girl jogging with her mom today. I was in slow moving traffic so I know she ran at least 2.5 miles (the distance between the lights causing said ...
4
votes
3answers
773 views

What should I do about my pre-teen son messaging older girls he's never met?

My 12 year son seems to be growing up way too soon.. He went from playing with his Legos one day to next texting girls the next. He goes back and forth. One day he is in the shower playing with his ...
5
votes
4answers
515 views

How do I get my pre-teen to stop asking to watch a TV show/movie?

Our 11-year-old daughter has become obsessed with a TV series that we won't let her watch. We have explained the reasoning as calmly as we could (without giving her all the details of course), and are ...
6
votes
4answers
9k views

At what age do teenagers begin to masturbate?

This is a delicate question. It is not a subject that I can ask my children about. At what age can a parent expect this activity to start?
3
votes
1answer
438 views

I can't motivate my 13 year old twins to get school work turned in

We have tried grounding them, taking all their privledges away, we have tried reward systems and nothing works. They have started lying about getting the work done and turned in when they know we ...
4
votes
2answers
165 views

A child accustomed to sleeping with the tv on

The tv is outside my 12 year old daughter's bedroom. She likes me to sit up until she falls asleep (which is not difficult). I pull the door to and we agree on a maximum volume that makes her feel ...
1
vote
1answer
2k views

My daughter is having sex with guys 10 years older than her; what do I do?

Hey everyone I have a huge issue I need to talk about.. My 12 year old daughter has been going around having sex with MULTIPLE guys 8 to 10 years older than her and has gotten a STD. I'm worried she ...
20
votes
14answers
11k views

Do parents of teens need a locked liquor cabinet?

I had this debate with some friends who have older children. We keep our liquor in the cupboard above the fridge. When they get a bit older (still just 8 and 10) and could potentially be tempted ...
18
votes
3answers
4k views

How do you respond when a child catches his parents having sex?

I ask this Question on behalf of my neighbor. Their 12 year old son saw his parents having sex. As there is only one room in their home we can't say its the parents' mistake... but now the question ...
35
votes
6answers
4k views

The school has assigned reading I feel is inappropriate for my son to read. How do I approach this problem with the school and with my son?

The school has assigned The Hunger Games as a literature reading assignment for my 11 year old. I read the books and enjoyed the ride, but feel the brutality is too much for this age group, in this ...