About the parents themselves, and not (only) about the children.

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31
votes
8answers
2k views

How can a dad be both a mother and father

I'm a dad and I've unexpectedly found myself raising my son effectively alone. I'm in an atypical single-parent situation, but more general single-dad advice would probably be better for other ...
28
votes
16answers
15k views

Just found out my daughter might be gay. Now what?

I recently came across a photo on my 14 year old daughter's iPod of a letter from a girl friend of hers that expressed her feelings for my daughter. Words like "I do melt in your eyes" and "I can't ...
24
votes
7answers
4k views

How to persuade my father to stop physically abusing my mother?

I know this is an SE site for parents dealing with kids... but I am desperate enough for answers, so here it goes. In summary: I am the daughter. My mother is being domestically abused by my father. ...
23
votes
5answers
4k views

The noise of his children playing makes a parent tired and glad to leave for work

I spoke on the phone to an old acquaintance, and he confessed the following: His second child was born half a year ago, the first child is now three. He goes to work, while his wife stays home with ...
17
votes
4answers
2k views

How can I tell parents of a 1-year-old that they're doing it wrong?

Without getting into the circumstances, my wife's step sister and her husband are living with us while he's between orders with the US army. She's 28 and he's 42. While they're living with us, it's ...
17
votes
5answers
1k views

What to do when parents disagree regarding their parenting

My husband and I often find that we parent differently. We know that up to a point that is why every child (hopefully) as two parents, so they can learn about difference in people, their approaches, ...
16
votes
4answers
1k views

For the benefit of the child: whats better - no father or bad father?

Whats best/better for the child in the long/short run - to have no father in his life or to have a "no-good" father in his life? And by "no-good" I mean - mentally and financially unstable, ...
15
votes
5answers
6k views

How do I approach my 13-year-old daughter's confusion regarding her sexuality?

My 13-year-old daughter is fascinated and obsessed with another girl. She is not able to do her normal routine things. She has not even talked to the girl yet the girl occupies her full mental space. ...
14
votes
2answers
292 views

How to explain to your child one of you parents isn't around

Apologies for the question but I am stumped on how to approach an issue and this will be hard to discuss so excuse me for being blunt. My parents divorced when I was 10 and that was the last time I ...
13
votes
5answers
1k views

Mother in law making us feel guilty about money

We have a mother in law who always makes uncomfortable comments about things we've purchased, such as our TV. We're a single income family with two children living in an apartment. We have no debt ...
13
votes
3answers
344 views

Methods for reducing or coping with sleep deprivation

Sleep deprivation is a major problems for parents of a newborn child. Are there methods which could help young parents cope with sleep deprivation or reduce it? Have you tried any of them? What is ...
13
votes
4answers
267 views

Balancing children's needs with a parent's own needs

For me, as a new parent I found it difficult to find a balance between meeting the needs of my son and my own needs. I was inclined to view my own needs as being selfish and an inadequacy within me ...
12
votes
6answers
2k views

Is it appropriate for parents to cry in front of their children?

Sometimes a parent may be feeling sad (for whatever reason) and needs to cry. Is it harmful, or could it even be good, to cry sometimes in front of your children? What does research say?
12
votes
8answers
3k views

Can a son share a bed with his girlfriend, at 27?

Your son is 27 and due to financial problems, you've invited him to move home. His 30 year old girlfriend is coming to stay. Should you oppose them sharing his double bed during her visit? This ...
12
votes
6answers
880 views

Do we NEED to help a baby learn how to self-sooth? And how long can it take?

Before our girls were born, I told my husband that I didn't want to go through "crying it out" because I knew I wouldn't be comfortable with it. At the time he agreed with me. However, after close to ...
12
votes
7answers
2k views

How much of an effect does parenting style have on a child?

I'm not a parent and I haven't done as much research as anyone on this website. This question is motivated by looking at many of my friends. Sometimes, I find that one sibling is a high achiever, ...
11
votes
6answers
219 views

Long-term preparations for becoming a parent?

I don’t have any immediate plans for a child. At the earliest (probably), I’ll become father in 3 years. I can imagine that the time will become stressful as soon as the child is on the way, not to ...
11
votes
9answers
566 views

How can I find time to relax during my maternity leave?

I'll be home on pregnancy leave for 4 months. We can't plan outdoor trips. I'll be staying at home with only two people around (during day time) - me and the baby. How can I find time during this ...
11
votes
8answers
3k views

How to deal with parent's (grandparent's) extreme political views?

Problem Space: My mother holds an extremely polarized political view that I do not agree with. My Specific Issue: My mother has recently gotten to the point where she literally personally blames ...
10
votes
4answers
1k views

Is it okay to leave a 3 year old alone to nap for 1 hour and 45 minutes if she isn't napping?

My wife and I disagree about this. I think it's a bit selfish and neglectful to leave her alone, especially when for the first 20 minutes she just cried and screamed. After that she was pretending her ...
10
votes
5answers
369 views

Relatives' son is awful. What is another option?

Background: While my wife and I provide an independent, creative and supporting environment for our kids, we also work very to hard to demonstrate "predictable consequences" for any behavior be it ...
9
votes
5answers
419 views

Restricting infant on almost every move

Most of the times I restrict my 10 month old on doing things which I feel would have a negative impact on him. For example, I say NO in a louder tone when he makes a desperate attempt to put his hand ...
9
votes
4answers
288 views

How to help my wife cope w/ being a stay-at-home mom

My wife stays at home with our 4yo and I work full time. We moved to our current city a year ago and do not have many friends or family in the area. She feels isolated and depressed, and also guilty ...
8
votes
6answers
459 views

Is it considered harmful in the longer run to frighten the child so that he behaves the way we want?

Not sure if there is a cultural difference. In our family it is considered normal to frighten the child so that he behaves the way we want. Example- Parent: Eat that quickly or the God will punish ...
8
votes
5answers
2k views

Any suggestions on how to control yelling and negativity on our part, and also teach my 8 yr old son to not feel so helpless and cry so easily?

This is about my 8-year old son, who cries easily and helplessly, mostly in response to our enforcing discipline and routine or refusing things he wants. I understand that he should not expect to be ...
8
votes
6answers
392 views

How do you keep up with a toddler?

My son is 2, and is seemingly a perpetual motion machine. He constantly wants me to "play cars" (we stand at a window sill and smash matchbox cars into each other), play "tag" or "chase me" around ...
8
votes
6answers
354 views

Loud Screaming to attract attention

Our 6 month baby screams at top of her throat to get attention , as soon as we resume playing with her she smiles and plays and she wants to play all day along which is not possible , so how to deal ...
8
votes
2answers
221 views

What is the minimum amount of structure and rules that a child needs?

My wife and I have very different ways of handling our children (almost 3 and 5 years old). We agree about the rules we want to set, but we are complete opposite when it comes to implementing the ...
8
votes
2answers
217 views

Should I keep giving toys back to my infant when he's deliberately dropping them?

After some reading, I understand that dropping stuff is a natural part of baby's development. What I couldn't find after some research, was whether or not I should keep giving the objects that he ...
8
votes
2answers
168 views

Caring for three under three: In what ways can the father help?

I have a full-time job, while my wife is a full-time homemaker. Our oldest has just turned three, our second is nearly two, and our third is a newborn. Not exactly three under three, but close. I am ...
7
votes
4answers
1k views

How do I tell my parents I'm no longer Christian?

Okay, I saw where someone else asked this question, but I had something else to add to it. I have been going to church my whole life and faithfully following the Christian religion for 18 or so years. ...
7
votes
3answers
366 views

Why do my parents start ridiculing me in front of my friends?

I don't know if this is in the right place to ask this question. I am 27 years old and I live with my fiance. Everytime I happen to meet my friends and my parents are around, or whenever my fiance ...
7
votes
2answers
429 views

What kind of impact have parental quarrels on children?

What kind of impact (permanent or temporary) can parental quarrels have over a child on the short-term and on the long-term? I wish to know if some studies have been done on the matter. Answers with ...
6
votes
7answers
3k views

How do I tell my parents that my wife and I are pregnant?

My wife and I are pregnant with our first child, and we want to find a unique and fun way to tell our parents.
6
votes
3answers
473 views

How can I avoid ugly arguments with my wife?

I was recently playing a board game with my 12 year-old son and wife of 18 years. We reached a point in the game where it was my turn to play while my wife could win the game with her next move. ...
6
votes
1answer
2k views

How damaging is it for children to witness their parent's sexual activity?

How damaging is it for children to witness their parent's sexual activity? I asked this question here Some strategies for maintaining adult relationships separately from children? Which needed to be ...
5
votes
3answers
265 views

Should I try and prevent my child from becoming like me (in some aspects)?

As an adult I realize I am not perfect. I have my "glitches". One of them is that I am too shy and an introvert to people that I do not know well (somewhat extrovert to friends and family). Would I ...
5
votes
2answers
258 views

Some strategies for maintaining adult relationships separately from children?

Some background. I have always been extremely careful about taking precautions to prevent my children from ever walking in on me when engaging in sexual activity. I've had a relationship with my next ...
4
votes
7answers
550 views

How do you evaluate yourself as a parent?

Given the complexities of being a parent, life itself, cultural difference, etc. -- how does one begin to evaluating yourself as a parent without being bias, or getting biased feedback?
4
votes
5answers
371 views

How can I get my mother to recognize that I've matured?

I can't convey to my mother that I've grown up already. Is it possible to explain this? I think that my mom has trouble leaving me on my own, because she can't live with thought: "my child has ...
4
votes
4answers
1k views

How can I protect my ears when the baby cries?

I'm suffering from tinnitus. In my case, this is a constant, high-pitched whine. The volume is insignificant when I'm relaxed in quiet surroundings, but stress and loud noise can instantly increase ...
4
votes
2answers
143 views

Coping with gestational diabetes

I had never been diabetic, but failed the glucose tolerance test during my pregnancy and have been diagnosed with Gestational Diabetes. I am under the care of a specialist and am on insulin and ...
4
votes
3answers
258 views

Not sure what to do about my teen daughters stealing and lying

My daughter has been lying and stealing from us as well as someone she called her BFF. We give her consequences and she continues with her stealing and lying. Recently I found out that she was cutting ...
3
votes
3answers
228 views

Is it okay to listen to rap music with violence and swear words when you're with your 7 month old?

My husband and I have been together for 15 years and have always considered our relationship to be a healthy one. But parenthood has taken its toll and we cannot seem to agree on a number of parenting ...
3
votes
4answers
316 views

How do you deal with when you've had a “parenting fail”?

I suppose all parents/caregivers may feel this way from time to time, but when a child does not listen to you or you have had a "parenting fail" so to speak, how do you deal with this? Edit: ...
3
votes
1answer
102 views

Should children of incarcerated parents be told the truth?

On Saturday mornings, I visit a nearby county jail. Most of the men I talk to are fathers. Some are serving short sentences and others are awaiting trials that will likely result in lengthy ...
3
votes
1answer
138 views

Sharing parenting/custody duties with an ex-partner

My son is 1.5 years old. I am no longer with his dad but he is an active part of my son's life and I would like his dad to help parent him half of the time and he has agreed to do so (keep him Mon-Sun ...
3
votes
1answer
217 views

Don't know what I feel toward my parents

I am a little bit confused about the feelings I have toward my parents. Since my parents started to have some problems with money the peace in my family was gone. They started to blame their children ...
2
votes
3answers
165 views

Stomach damage/sickness long after pregnancy?

My wife had quite a tough time during pregnancy. She had morning sickness all the way through, vomiting regularly, although not enough to put her in hospital or require treatment. She also had severe ...
2
votes
2answers
828 views

What are some good strategies to support extended breast feeding of 2 years for new parents

Interested to know some guidelines for parents who would like to go for extended breastfeeding. One threat we see to this is reduction of breastmilk as I have heard from many mothers that their milk ...