How to enforce the rules you set for the child, and consequences when those rules are broken. See the tag [behavior] about why children act the way they do.

learn more… | top users | synonyms (1)

79
votes
17answers
7k views

How can you deal with tantrums without spanking?

My son just turned 2, and he started throwing more tantrums on us. He doesn't eat well or drink enough milk ... and he is becoming more adamant and says "No" more often. If we force him to drink ...
47
votes
14answers
6k views

How should I handle an 8 year old lawyering and quibbling?

How should I handle an 8 year old lawyering and quibbling? E.g., anytime he has a rule, or a task, or is told what to do, his FIRST impulse is nearly 100% to find some fault with the technicality or ...
42
votes
16answers
12k views

Should I stop my mother in law visiting when she doesn't respect me as the father figure?

Sadly these are her words, not mine. Why is this posted in this QA site? Because I can't see how it is good for the children that she (when my wife is not around) shouts at me in front of them; cuts ...
32
votes
10answers
5k views

My child is ignoring my timeouts and walking away from them. What are some options for handling this?

I have a two and a half year old daughter. Recently she's been acting up generally, and ignoring timeouts by getting up and walking away. I would pick her up and plant her down again, but I know ...
30
votes
9answers
2k views

What are some suggestions for punishing a child?

My daughters are clearly pushing the boundaries lately. They are trying to find out what is possible. I am really looking into ways to setting the boundaries. A friend recently suggested creating a ...
28
votes
10answers
6k views

Is there a benefit or harm in letting a 3 year old control her own bedtime routine?

I'm a bit exhausted getting my 3 year old daughter through the evening. Getting home, washing hands, sitting at the dinner table, eating dinner, eating fruit, taking a bath, towel drying, drying ...
27
votes
9answers
1k views

Reasoning vs “because I say so”

Raising our two-year-old, my wife and I have slightly different views on how to get our child to obey instructions, such as "get in the car seat" and "put on your shirt." One of us feels that it is ...
26
votes
8answers
85k views

How can we discipline a strong-willed, misbehaving 5 year-old?

My 5 year old son receives and fears punishment but repeatedly exhibits the same unacceptable behaviors. He's always been strong-willed, and is usually the kind to view a statement like "Don't do ...
25
votes
6answers
5k views

What is the best way to respond if my child is picked on by other children?

What can I do if other children pick on my children? Obviously I can't perform any disciplinary actions. Reprimanding might make my child look like a "mama's boy" and doing nothing might look like a ...
23
votes
8answers
2k views

Is punishment necessary?

I'm a young parent, and still have a lot to learn, but I have been wondering a lot about whether punishment needs to be a part of parenting. Maybe I'm being too optimistic here, but are there any ...
21
votes
8answers
2k views

Why do kids always do things which we tell them NOT to do?

This is the kind of behaviour which I have seen in lot of kids including mine (2 year old). When I tell him NOT to hold a knife, he will make sure he does it. If I tell him not to spill milk on the ...
20
votes
7answers
2k views

How to avoid corporal punishment?

I know that beating and spanking is no good, but there are situations sometimes when I'm unable to maintain control over myself. We have two boys, one's five and the other's two. Due to their age ...
20
votes
6answers
1k views

How do you stop a child from talking back without discouraging them from asserting themselves?

Our 3.5 yo is starting to talk back to us in the typical futile yes/no/yes/no pattern of opposites. The other day it was hooking his straps on his car seat; I asked him to put his arms in (like we ...
20
votes
6answers
1k views

How do you discipline someone else's child?

We have friend who is living with us and he has a 5-year old boy. The child has been disrespectful and distructive. He tore a ceiling fan down, and has been breaking stuff and writing on the walls. ...
20
votes
3answers
3k views

How do you handle poor behavior by other people's children?

I believe that interacting with a variety of other children at social functions is an important part of childhood development. However, there seem to be a lot of children who are... how shall I ...
19
votes
5answers
4k views

Does good cop/bad cop work with children?

My wife and I have descended into the toddler years with our first. Along with that, she is getting that classic toddler attitude. We understand it's a growing phase and tantrums and outbursts are ...
19
votes
5answers
569 views

When (if ever) is it appropriate to spy on your teenager's texts?

I'm an active member of Android Enthusiasts Stack Exchange and recently came across this question by a parent, asking for advice on spying on his teenage (I'm assuming) son's texts without getting ...
18
votes
5answers
2k views

How do you handle unsupervised, poorly behaved children in public play areas?

This is closely related to this question. However, that primarily deals with interactions at relatively controlled, private functions. This question is more focused on the feeding-frenzy style chaos ...
17
votes
7answers
2k views

How to approach my little brother's addiction to TV and computer?

I'm 26, my younger brother is 13. He is spending almost all of his day on TV and computer. Common problem, but I am really worried about him. I came back to live in my parents' house since it's ...
17
votes
9answers
901 views

What do we do when timeouts are not effective?

We have a three year old toddler, and he has just seemed to realize that timeouts are nothing more than him sitting in a corner for a few minutes. He has recently started doing a whole suite of bad ...
16
votes
6answers
3k views

Is it a good approach to have a policy of apologizing for yelling at a kid?

A couple of times I encountered situation where people had a following policy If a parent yells at a kid out of frustration with no meaningful reason (e.g. the kid just got on their nerves but ...
16
votes
11answers
7k views

How do I deal with a child that refuses to do a chore or task?

How do I deal with 7 year old kid who refuses to do a chore or task? He's not listening and ignores my request.
16
votes
5answers
2k views

My son witnessed a friend receiving corporal punishment; how do I prevent this from sending the wrong message?

As I was picking my son up from daycare the other day, another boy's "Nanny" (grandmother, I presume) was picking him up at the same time. The boy was playing, and grabbing on to other children's ...
16
votes
8answers
2k views

How do I put my child in time-out when we're in public?

What is the recommended thing to do when my kids are misbehaving in public? For instance, I have had situations where they are yelling and throwing stuff in a restaurant, or the other day they one ...
15
votes
12answers
5k views

How can I get my 4 year old to clean up toys without a battle?

Multiple times during the day, we have our 4 year old take a break from playing to clean up her toys. It's a huge battle every time. Usually, she ends up on the ground saying that there are too many ...
15
votes
7answers
1k views

How can I negotiate with a toddler successfully?

Recently our 2.5 daughter started being really annoying about doing simple daily things, like brushing her teeth, dressing, undressing, putting on shoes to go out, etc. Often we need to negotiate up ...
15
votes
3answers
2k views

How can we discipline our toddler?

TL;DR version: Toddler doesn't understand disciplining. Help needed. At 22 months, our toddler is incredibly active and always has been. He's also mostly very well-behaved, especially when being ...
14
votes
7answers
900 views

How to react to “cruelty” of a toddler?

My son is two and a half years old and is not in general of the violent type. However he regularly enjoys showing "cruelty". By that I mean that regularly when he "by accident" (let's stay positive) ...
13
votes
12answers
35k views

Is the “1 2 3 Magic” strategy for disciplining effective?

Has anyone had experience with the discipline strategies put forth in the book "1 2 3 Magic" by Thomas W Phelan? "1-2-3 Magic" involves counting your child for bad behavior. For example, your ...
13
votes
4answers
719 views

How to get a child to stop pretending to choke on foods he doesn't want to eat?

I have a 4 1/2 yr old. We're at the stage where he's definitely finicky over foods. The issue is not so much that he's finicky, but that he expresses it by taking a bite and then mock choking. I am ...
13
votes
9answers
3k views

How can I motivate my 16 yo daughter to do something valuable with her life?

I have a 16 year old daughter who, whenever she has free time wastes it on things that I think are futile like Facebook, Tumblr, etc. She's also performing poorly at school. I've talked to her about ...
13
votes
8answers
20k views

How do you stop a child from using bad language and profanity?

My child has started to use swear words. This is shocking because he is using words that we don't use. I'm not sure how to react! How do I get this to stop?
13
votes
4answers
3k views

What consequences are appropriate for pre-teens?

There comes a time when time-outs don't cut it anymore. Normally, when my kids exercise poor judgement, I let them experience natural consequences. However, sometimes their actions go against what we ...
12
votes
6answers
4k views

What should you do after you've raised your voice at your child?

We've all lost our cool at one point or another. We all know its terrible to raise your voice at your kids, but every once in a while we slip. I've occasionally raised my voice to my teenager and to ...
12
votes
6answers
3k views

How to direct my one-year old baby not to do bad things

I have a one-year old baby, she is smart and loves to try everything and anything, including putting her fingers in the electricity and tasting every possible thing she finds :) How can I tell my ...
12
votes
8answers
1k views

How do I convince a stubborn 8 year old that the parents are supposed to be in charge?

Our daughter thinks she has an equal say in any of our decisions. She only does the things we tell her to do if she thinks they make sense, otherwise we have to threaten her, which makes her threaten ...
12
votes
7answers
2k views

How do we teach our 1 yr. old that “no” isn't a game?

We have a little girl that's almost 13 months old. She's found that when she touches a power cord or near an electrical outlet and we say "no" that it's a bit of a game. She gets a funny smirk on her ...
12
votes
3answers
917 views

How do I stop my daughter from hitting another child?

Recently my daughter started to hit another girl with whom she is currently sharing her nanny. My daughter is 2 years and 2 months now, the other child is 1 year 3 months. The nanny was our daughters ...
12
votes
4answers
263 views

How to positively teach a toddler dishonest actions are bad

While on vacation my family and I were at a store and my 4 year old daughter had picked up a toy and placed it on the checkout belt. At this time we did not notice the toy and proceeded to checkout ...
11
votes
12answers
2k views

When is physical punishment appropriate? [closed]

In what instances do you feel that striking your child is the most appropriate course of action?
11
votes
4answers
2k views

At what age can children understand and respond well to discipline?

When my daughter was 6 months old, she liked to crawl over to our floor lamp and play with it (which is dangerous). Instead of trying to correct her behavior, we simply moved the lamp behind a child ...
10
votes
11answers
4k views

How to deal with a teenage daughter who refuses to dress modestly

My husband and I and are the parents of three wonderful children, but we've been having some issues lately with our 15 year old, our middle child. She continues to wear skirts that are much too short ...
10
votes
5answers
632 views

Is complimenting children where they can hear it good or bad?

TL;DR: Is there anything wrong with praising children to their parents while the children can hear it? From R. Kipling's "The jungle book": ‘How beautiful are the noble children! How large are ...
10
votes
8answers
1k views

How can I stop repeating myself?

How can I get my child to listen to me the first time I ask for something? He pretends he didnt hear after the 4th time I ask, but it is obvious he did hear me the first time. He is two years old by ...
10
votes
4answers
17k views

How can I deal with my 12-year old son's rebellious behaviour?

My son is a very loving child and fun to be with usually....ever since he turned 12 he is suddenly the resident expert in the house on anything from how to drive a car to how become president. You ...
10
votes
5answers
555 views

Preschooler can't sing, but sings anyway - loudly!

My 3½ year old has never had any sense of music, rhythm, notes, or anything resembling the musical arts. (Motor skills is where he truly excels; he's a sports person, not a musician.) Recently, he ...
10
votes
3answers
2k views

At what age can you start giving time-outs?

Is 2 years too young? She hit her baby brother and I'm not sure she really will understand th concept of time-out yet.
10
votes
3answers
713 views

How can parents avoid their child becoming a “whiner”?

Inspired from my previous question, but distilled to be more specific: What types of parenting would cause a child to become a "whiner?" By this, I mean that the child becomes someone who tends to ...
10
votes
3answers
713 views

How do you moderate a teenager's obsessive or excessive behavior?

We're not dealing with teenagers yet but I would really like to avoid this kind of outburst. How have parents with teenagers been able to find/establish a balance for their children to not be so ...
10
votes
5answers
504 views

How do you respond to a teenager who has started to smoke?

How can you best handle this? Coming off as too strong and authoritative might invite "rebellion". Too lenient makes it seem okay. What is the best response for driving home the dangers and risks ...