Questions about why children act the way they do. See the tag [discipline] about enforcing your rules.

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28
votes
8answers
123k views

How can we discipline a strong-willed, misbehaving 5 year-old?

My 5 year old son receives and fears punishment but repeatedly exhibits the same unacceptable behaviors. He's always been strong-willed, and is usually the kind to view a statement like "Don't do ...
20
votes
12answers
2k views

How do you feed a picky eater?

Dinner with my 5-year-old is an ordeal. I do not want to cook separate meals. How do I stop the fighting at dinner and get them to eat?
10
votes
6answers
216k views

What to do when my 3-year-old holds poop in and won't go in diaper or on potty?

My son is almost 3 (33 months) and for the past few months, he has been holding his poop in, to the point that he won't go for many days a time. When this started, the doctor advised us to give him ...
31
votes
11answers
5k views

Should I really be insisting that my daughter finish eating her meal?

Like many young children, my 4.5 year old daughter will often stop eating her supper (6 PMish - she has breakfast and lunch at daycare) and say she's not hungry. My instinctive initial response is to ...
53
votes
16answers
3k views

Is bribing children with cash incentives a good idea?

I pay my 5.5yo $1 if she sleeps in her own bed and take $1 in rent when she sleeps in our bed. I've also taken to offering her $1 to pick up her 2.5 year old brother's Lego messes. Good or bad? ...
15
votes
9answers
7k views

How can I get my son to stay in bed at bedtime?

Lately my 4.5 year old son has started getting back up after bed time. Frequently we will go through the entire bedtime ritual, including a bath, pajamas, brushing teeth, books, and then being tucked ...
3
votes
2answers
14k views

How can we get our 5 year old son to control his temper and behave

Our youngest of 2 sons is 5 years old and demonstrating really bad behaviour. This has been on going for 2 years. He has just started primary one and is a march birthday so one of the oldest in his ...
31
votes
8answers
2k views

What are some suggestions for punishing a child?

My daughters are clearly pushing the boundaries lately. They are trying to find out what is possible. I am really looking into ways to setting the boundaries. A friend recently suggested creating a ...
18
votes
10answers
59k views

My 5 year- old daughter is constantly defiant!

My 5-year old daughter is very defiant. It started getting bad about 6 months ago. She doesn't do what she is told, and any time she hears the word no she throws terribly over dramatic fits screaming ...
5
votes
1answer
3k views

Suggestions for a 5 year old who can't sit still in her chair?

I have a 5 year old daughter and she has a real struggle to: Sit in the middle of her chair Stay there without fidgetting In terms of #1, she often falls off her chair as she sits on the edge. ...
16
votes
8answers
4k views

Why should children be rewarded for good behaviour?

I have been reading about star charts and other reward systems for children, and wonder whether rewarding what I would call normal behaviour (e.g. do your chores, don't hit your little brother, etc) ...
13
votes
7answers
20k views

How can I motivate my child who doesn't care about rewards?

My son is 8 and has always been argumentative and basically lazy with doing ANYTHING since he could talk. If he has homework that takes ten minutes, he will take two hours due to just leaving the ...
29
votes
3answers
5k views

How do you handle poor behavior by other people's children?

I believe that interacting with a variety of other children at social functions is an important part of childhood development. However, there seem to be a lot of children who are... how shall I ...
16
votes
7answers
5k views

When should a child stop using a pacifier, and how can I help with this transition?

I am curious how a child can be helped to move on from his/her pacifier, and what age is a good age to do this?
12
votes
7answers
30k views

Why does my child eat so slowly?

When we have a family meal, the middle daughter will always take her time. I mean up to 2 hours, to finish a meal, especially if its not her kind of food. She'll get very easily distracted, sing to ...
12
votes
5answers
37k views

When should an infant stop sucking on her hands?

My little girl about 3 months old and she already mouths quite frequently on her hands. Should we try to discourage this behavior now (by pulling her hand away when we find her doing it), or wait ...
11
votes
4answers
6k views

What constitutes verbal abuse of one's child?

I frequently see parents engaging in behavior that I perceive to be verbal abuse. However, with so many parents falling in different places with regard to the strictness of their discipline, the ...
10
votes
7answers
11k views

How to prevent children from sucking their thumb?

My 4-years-old daughter still sucks her thumb while sleeping. How can help her stopping this habit? I have tried to give her a pacifier, but she refuses it. She does not have this habit during the ...
9
votes
7answers
3k views

How strict should we be with our 14 month old boy?

Our baby is really sweet :) Generally can be considered as a good / easy going baby. There are times though, when he gets totally out of control. I've had a discussion with a child-psychologist who ...
20
votes
5answers
53k views

Why does my baby grind her face into my shoulder?

During episodes of fussiness, my 6-week-old daughter has started grinding her face into my chest or shoulder. She shakes vigorously from side to side like she's trying to burrow out the other side. ...
11
votes
3answers
890 views

How do you operate a successful “Star Chart”?

So, one of the techniques for improving behaviour that you often hear about is the "star chart". You put the focus on good behaviour by adding stars (I nearly said "badges") for the good stuff and ...
8
votes
3answers
3k views

How do I teach my toddler not to stuff her cheeks with food?

My 20-month-old daughter, given the opportunity, will stuff her cheeks full of food she likes (especially cheese, raisins, or green beans) to the point where it's difficult for her to chew or swallow. ...
14
votes
2answers
2k views

How to restrain my 13-year-old pubescent sister?

Just to understand my position: I, as her older brother (she is without father, 13 and I'm 24), have to sometimes act like her parent, because mom just can't restrain her, when she starts yelling or ...
4
votes
3answers
275 views

Destructive when unattended

We have been having trouble with my seven year-old son when he is unattended at naptime and bedtime. When he can't sleep, he gets bored, and when he gets bored, he gets destructive. The latest was ...
41
votes
14answers
11k views

How should I inform parents if their children are bothering me?

Today, on the bus, I was seated a row behind a mother and her young daughter (I guess about 5-6 years old), and the child just couldn't stay quiet: she was singing constantly, saying "byebye, please ...
19
votes
7answers
8k views

How much should I interact with my newborn?

I have a 2 month old baby. My wife and I take care of him collectively. As he is growing, his sleep time is reducing. Sometimes, due to our schedules, we want him to sleep, but the baby is still ...
12
votes
5answers
848 views

Is complimenting children where they can hear it good or bad?

TL;DR: Is there anything wrong with praising children to their parents while the children can hear it? From R. Kipling's "The jungle book": ‘How beautiful are the noble children! How large are ...
25
votes
5answers
53k views

My son is 5 years old and sexually active

I am a 20 year old female student and I have a 5 year old son who is really sexually active. For instance, he kisses girls by force, he forces them to lick his penis, he "fingers" them, he speaks ...
15
votes
7answers
1k views

How can I negotiate with a toddler successfully?

Recently our 2.5 daughter started being really annoying about doing simple daily things, like brushing her teeth, dressing, undressing, putting on shoes to go out, etc. Often we need to negotiate up ...
24
votes
7answers
3k views

How can 7-year old defend himself when toddler is hitting?

I am a mother to a 7 year old boy and I have a friend who has a 2 years toddler. Both my friend and I try our best to use the Conscious and Peaceful Parenting Approach. Her little daughter is lovely ...
25
votes
5answers
2k views

How do you handle unsupervised, poorly behaved children in public play areas?

This is closely related to this question. However, that primarily deals with interactions at relatively controlled, private functions. This question is more focused on the feeding-frenzy style chaos ...
14
votes
2answers
1k views

Have studies shown whether toys that feature guns or other weapons prominently promote violent behavior?

Note: I am looking for referenced answers only! Answers citing one or more peer reviewed studies, or, better yet, a meta analysis of several such studies, would be ideal. Answers that reference ...
11
votes
4answers
5k views

How to deal with incessant talking?

Our 4 year-old is constantly talking. This isn't your average pestering parents on a topic until they answer or you lose interest. He never loses interest and continually switches to any random ...
7
votes
6answers
32k views

Can temper tantrums indicate a behavior problem?

I understand that temper tantrums are relatively normal for many children. However, some children seem to have far more temper tantrums than other children their age, and others far fewer. Can ...
6
votes
5answers
415 views

How should I deal with my toddler's difficult behavior towards food?

My daughter is almost 15 months old and has always been a small eater. She was breastfed for the first 5 months then solids were gradually introduced. It went okay for the first few weeks but soon it ...
22
votes
4answers
3k views

How do you handle grandparents who spoil your children?

Our parents suddenly don't apply their rules in our upbringing to our children. On the contrary. How should we deal with this? Do we just let it be, or should we discuss the matter. I understand ...
20
votes
7answers
8k views

What are some ways to teach a child how to spit (after brushing their teeth)?

Typically, this is something you don't want out of a child. My 4 1/2 yr old has been brushing his own teeth for about a year. The problem is that I can't convey to him to spit out the toothpaste. I ...
12
votes
7answers
4k views

How do we teach our 1 yr. old that “no” isn't a game?

We have a little girl that's almost 13 months old. She's found that when she touches a power cord or near an electrical outlet and we say "no" that it's a bit of a game. She gets a funny smirk on her ...
11
votes
2answers
486 views

Should imaginary friends be accepted or discouraged?

As a professional working with families, I am often asked about imaginary friends. I never experienced this behavior with my own son so I have little personal information to share. One child ...
7
votes
3answers
170 views

What are good ways to begin preparing a child for a new baby?

I have a 4 and a half month old, so this won't be applicable for a while, but I would like to raise my son with the idea that he won't be an only child forever. I want my children to have a good ...
12
votes
7answers
709 views

How do you address a 5 year old that has problems accepting corrections?

My 5 year old niece who is 'kind of' smart, (i.e. was playing solitaire online before her 3rd birthday and is now doing 4 digit addition/subtraction and multiplication up to 5's; and reads chapter ...
12
votes
6answers
6k views

What should you do after you've raised your voice at your child?

We've all lost our cool at one point or another. We all know its terrible to raise your voice at your kids, but every once in a while we slip. I've occasionally raised my voice to my teenager and to ...
9
votes
2answers
860 views

What kind of impact have parental quarrels on children?

What kind of impact (permanent or temporary) can parental quarrels have over a child on the short-term and on the long-term? I wish to know if some studies have been done on the matter. Answers with ...
9
votes
9answers
10k views

teenage child with severe daily temper tantrums and whining

My 13 year old daughter has severe and daily outbursts - sometimes as many as 10 a day - from time she gets up till time she goes to bed. This has been going on since she was of walking and talking ...
9
votes
2answers
2k views

How to go about regaining the trust of my child?

Having experienced parental alienation syndrome, my child is very reticent and unresponsive to my attempts in rebuilding our relationship. The condition is very much like sulking, but with an ...
9
votes
3answers
605 views

How can I handle a child that claims medical problems as a bad excuse?

I have 3 kids who seem to use medical reasons for excuses, most often to not go to bed. For instance, my 7 year old periodically "Can't move" at bed time to get to his bed, but when he gets in there, ...
9
votes
4answers
2k views

How do I teach my toddler not to abuse animals?

We have two dogs and two cats, and our son loves to interact with them, but his form of interacting is not particularly enjoyable to the animals... Some of the things he does are just annoying, like ...
9
votes
7answers
4k views

How do you deal with a 9 year old not doing their homework?

My 9 year old girl is currently going through a phase where she isn't getting her homework done by herself. I'm trying to find the right balance between encouraging her to get her homework done, yet, ...
8
votes
2answers
1k views

How can I teach my 5yo son to respect authority?

My kid is nearly 5, and damn clever but unfortunately he lacks empathy and social skills. Among other things, he does not understand that when a parent gives an order, that order is to be followed -- ...
8
votes
5answers
714 views

Is it normal for a five year-old to be put in detention repeatedly for not being able to sit still and be quiet?

My granddaughter is having trouble in school and at home, but more at school. She is 5 1/2 years old and in kindergarten. She is having trouble not being still, moving hands or feet, and humming or ...