Questions about parenting adopted children and about becoming an adoptive parent

learn more… | top users | synonyms

5
votes
2answers
142 views

Adopt before giving birth, or give birth before adopting?

I'm not a parent but I have considered children for the future. I was having a conversation with my partner about adoption / birth. Let's say we were to (choosing my words carefully not wishing to ...
4
votes
1answer
53 views

We are beginning the process to foster and adopt a second child, how do we temper our first child's expectations?

I'd like to start by saying, I've seen the question, How can we prepare our child for the arrival of adopted siblings and although I have not looked at every linked resource thoroughly, it looks like ...
3
votes
1answer
73 views

When does an adoption “sink in” for a child?

We adopted our six year-old son at age one. When he asks questions or makes comments about the first year of his life, or when he was "in momma's tummy," we have never lied to him. We tell him we ...
4
votes
2answers
302 views

Giving the baby away in New Jersey?

I am a pregnant woman: if my baby is proven mentally retarded, what's the procedure I should take to give my baby away to the state foster care? Do I have to pay the state child support if I give my ...
2
votes
1answer
37 views

What steps should be taken to prepare for and smoothly complete the home study process of adoptions?

As a part of becoming adoptive parents, a home study needs to be done for the family. What can be done to prepare all parties involved in the family (parents, siblings, etc) to smoothly get through ...
13
votes
2answers
270 views

How can we prepare our child for the arrival of adopted siblings?

We are going through the process preparing to become adoptive parents. We have an 8-year-old biological child already. What are some things things we can do to help him be prepared, A) for no longer ...
1
vote
1answer
216 views

How can a much older brother gain recognition for being a de-facto father?

I'm 26 years old and live with my mother who is a single mother. She adopted two children as newborns who are now 5 years old. My mom has recently started working outside the home so now I even get ...
11
votes
3answers
851 views

What are the pros and cons of school-aged adopted children taking their adoptive parents' name?

We are in the final stages of adopting kids ranging from ages 7-12. The question has come up a time or two about last names, namely if they should keep their last names, or if we should give them ...
9
votes
1answer
121 views

How should a child respond to peers who ask about their adoption?

Our child has always known they are free to ask about the circumstances of their adoption and we have always given open, honest, age-appropriate answers. However, this "free to talk" attitude may not ...
6
votes
1answer
355 views

What should we be considering when adopting a sibling for our 4-year-old son?

I have been wanting to adopt a child for some time now, and my wife and I are now trying to arrange things in our life to make it possible, such as trying to get out of debt so we can afford it and ...
5
votes
1answer
111 views

How should I handle my foster son saying he's not my 'real' kid?

I have a foster son, who today loudly and quite seriously proclaimed that he's not my real kid. He's lived with us for over a year, and we are most likely going to adopt him, having started the ...